To give up a secure council tenancy even though I can’t really afford to

[casperz]

Due to the fact that as an autistic woman going through peri menopause and struggling massively with my mental health I cannot stand the level of noise from the neighbours and their children and the anti social behaviour. It’s sensory hell living here and I can never fully relax which is making my anxiety worse. I was on antidepressants which I only started on since moving here a couple of years back but I came off them when i started HRT. Ideally I don’t want to go back on them as they made me feel like a a zombie but at the same time I can’t cope feeling on edge from hearing the constant screams (actual screams not just kids having fun) of the feral kids running amuck in the street, banging their footballs off neighbours fences and cars including my own, neighbours getting drunk ending up fighting and smashing their house up, smelling weed in my house as the neighbours smoke inside instead of outside.

Our rent is currently £450 a months and if we were to move into private rented we’d be looking at least £1000 a month. We can’t really afford this as I can only work part time (husband is full time) as our youngest dc is autistic and needs one of us around but I’m that desperate that I’m
actual willing to work nights or get a second job working weekends, missing out on seeing my husband, so that we can afford a house in a better area. My husband whilst fully understands my frustration thinks we’d be crazy to give up an affordable and secure council house. AIBU to not care and want to move?

If you would need a second job to afford it maybe try doing that bit first, see you you feel having done that for (say) 6 months and see if it is something you can sustain long term.

Yes I totally get it.
I dream of living in a cottage in the Scottish highlands surrounded by only fields.

But that’s not real life unfortunately.

I imagine that most people telling you to log and report the noise and ASB haven’t had to deal with a council that do absolutely nothing to help.

I get what you’re saying @vivaespanaole I’m really sensitive to noise to and I have auditory processing disorder but in all the other houses I’ve lived in the noise from other people hasn’t really bothered me as it’s been minimal. Where I currently live though it actually feels painful at times. Which I know sounds daft but factor in hearing issues and autism well it’s very common to feel certain noise as pain.

Aw a house in the middle of nowhere especially in Scotland is my absolute fantasy lol. Me and my friends often chat about what we’d do if we won the lottery or came into some money. They would buy flash cars and go on fancy holidays where as me I’d be happy to just win enough for a house deposit or for a modest house in the middle of nowhere. I’d quite happily stick with my years old Nissan car as would dh and I’d still holiday in the UK, still shop at Aldi etc as long as I could buy a house I’d be ecstatic lol.

All these posters saying the same thing! Think of the worst etc.

In your position I would do everything I could to make my life the best it can be. Especially at home. The only post I did agree with is to work more first and see if it works or adds extra issues.

Once you make that move it will be extremely hard to get back probably impossible. I rented, and it financially destroyed me I was so skint, I got no enjoyment out of life as there was absolutely no money for food, outings etc, the 80% went on rent, it was a really depressing, anxious filled time. I would not recommend it

If it's a continuous nuisance stopping you being able to enjoy your property you can take this up with the landlord.

Even if you just threaten to sue that's a whole lot of money they won't want to spend.

They can and should evict those who are causing an actual civil offense of nuisance.

To prove a private nuisance has occurred (or is occurring) the following must be present:

• Continuous interference;
• Unlawful or unreasonable interference;
• Interference of the use or enjoyment of land or some right over it.

So if that's an option with any of the continuous offenders you could try putting a case together and telling the HA you've consulted a solicitor and are going to sue.

Can you speak to your HA and ask to be moved because of your autism and the fact you can't cope there?

it sounds like hell. But having a housing association home is amazing and the security you get is something private renters and home owners have less of in times like these with the massive energy hikes. The rent is also really really low and can free up money for other things.

As challenging as you may find it try a swap to another area or house? Housing a major problem UK wide and you don't want to be in a position if you opt to rent privately, and your circs change, you may find yourself in need.

Because you have a house for life where you are. A job and rentals are never guaranteed.
The market is horrendous and it's not getting better

I really sympathise.
It is possible to get rid of difficult neighbours. We had a really obnixious family in our street and the immediate neighbours went on to the council pretty relentlessly until they were rehoused.
A new, slightly less nutty family moved in. It was clear they had mayhem-potential; parked over pavement, loud, unboundaried kids, dumping removal packaging in the street. Their neighbours wasted no time welcoming them and telling them how relieved they were to see such a lovely family move in as the whole street was so relieved to have got rid of the last lot. I think this stopped them in their tracks.

Get the 2nd job for a bit and save up £ - use it to soundproof your house - evne if it’s just your bedroom to start with so you have a quiet space. Stay put 150%

Definitely agree with PP who said about getting the extra job first, I work 2 jobs (9-5 office mon-Fri and then 1/2 weekday nights plus Saturday Sunday 6-10) it's bloody hard juggling kids and 2 jobs...plus it would have the added bonus of getting you out of the house to see if you could sustain it first.

I think you would find it hard working so many hours just for the roof over your head and not have much to show for it, I do feel for you though my neighbour is a prize cock aswell

Sounds like you have made your mind up so why post?

I haven’t made my mind up. I’m
genuinely torn. Plus my dh would have to agree to a move which we the minute it’s a no and I’d also need to consider how a move would impact my ds.

What are your links to the area like? Do you have family you want to stay near to? I ask because I recall another post on here about a lady who had put herself on every council housing list she could find and been offered a nice place in Scotland. Obviously that might be a risk as you may find you move hundreds of miles away only to encounter similarly horrendous neighbours but maybe worth considering trying other areas as another option?

I’m not autistic but I live alone in social housing in a high density area. The noise from neighbours just living their lives is sometimes unbearable but I do understand that my not making much noise skews my perspective.

in summer it’s power tools, garden parties, kids in paddling pools, loud music, dogs barking, fools who only communicate with each other by shouting. In winter it’s door slamming and people shouting, kids crying, I could go on…

However, most people are genuinely ok people. We are a mixed neighbourhood of very wealthy home owners living next to council tenants and private renters. You can’t change them.

Honestly sometimes worse areas are better. Places get a bad reputation but most of the time it’s either long gone or it’s between those people not the one who live in peace around them.

Id live in a shit area as a non shit person to keep a council tenancy. Once you’re out, you’re out.

I’ve lived in a shit area and street I never had a single problem until one neighbour but even they only lasted so long. Streets had no problems since but it’s still a “shit hole” to anyone who will tell you about it. Only takes one house to give a street a label.

You could move and end up with nightmare neighbours too, and have to pay double for it.

Sorry, it sounds v difficult situation.

All of mine and dh’s family live in the area and my ds’s amazing specialist school is a ten minute drive away. Plus I have a teenage dd who starts her GCSEs next year so moving to far away isn’t an option unfortunately.

True. Although we were lucky in our previous houses and never had any problems.

My bad and good neighbours have always been private tenants.

could throw in a few none council houses smoking pot but the worst was the private tenant.

Oh I know I can’t change them that’s why I’ve been looking into other alternatives eg moving. As a family we are fairly quiet. In the almost 3 years we’ve lived here we’ve not had a party, we don’t have loud dc, we don’t have a dog, don’t smoke etc and I like to think i‘m a considerate person eg speaking like a normal person and not shouting, not running my washing machine to early in the morning, pulling my dc up if they’re being to loud which is rare etc etc. I know not everyone is the same but basic respect for other people isn’t difficult.

It depends on the area, but generally yes it is, lots of people lie !! My son has local authority 2 bed and his rents just gone up to £450 month, it's a relatively new build. Local rent in his area for the same size averages around £650 / £750 per month.

Protecting your mental health is not remotely irresponsible; just ignore that nonsense.

I did exactly this. Gave up social housing for a private rental for double the rent and more.

My neighbours were unbelievable, parties through the week, fighting in the streets, drugs, music all the time. I was the only one with a job to get up for it was horrific.

Best thing I ever did, my mental health suffered horribly, driving onto the street even gave me anxiety. No amount of complaints made a difference and police were out every other week and still nothing happened. I honestly think it's sometimes worth the sacrifice for peace of mind.