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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think my friends aren’t coming?

549 replies

UnluckyCoil · 01/04/2023 17:16

Arranged earlier in the week for a catch up round mine which is a rarity as my DH is away- both friends agreed to come.
This morning at 9am, put a message in the group chat asking what time they were coming so I can make sure my house is tidy, make sure baby is asleep etc and neither have them have replied or even opened the message.
They are the kind of people who have theirs phones with them 24/7 so can’t imagine they’ve not looked at their phones for 8hrs.
I don’t mind but I guess I just want to know either way.. and I’ve bought drinks and snacks. I’d feel embarrassed to put a chase message in the group chat.
They aren’t coming are they?

OP posts:
Red0 · 27/04/2023 12:40

*your 🙄

Phoebo · 27/04/2023 12:42

UnluckyCoil · 27/04/2023 12:35

Ha! Woah. Sorry I’m a very rare MN user and didn’t realise this had blown up how it did.
They didn’t show. The excuses came about 15 minutes after their expected arrival time and radio silence ever since.

What do you mean radio silence? You've not heard from them again??

Throwncrumbs · 27/04/2023 12:44

Mondayblues23 · 01/04/2023 19:02

Ring??? Absolutely not. If anyone has the audacity to ring me, I'll wait until it stops ringing then message 5 minutes later saying "sorry I missed your call. Are you ok?" I find calls so intrusive Grin

Sorry that your friends have let you down. It sounds like you had a nice evening planned for them, I hope you enjoy your evening with a little peace & quiet instead!

I also hate the "sounds good" vague replies. So annoying. "Ok, sounds good. I'll be there just after 7 is more appropriate".

Why is someone phoning you intrusive? I must be of an age where I use my phone as a bloody phone, otherwise it’s a texting device! Ridiculous to think that actually speaking to someone on the phone isn’t done anymore! I called my son out about this, asked to babysit, then a bloody text ‘don’t need you now’ that’s far ruder than phoning and saying it!

Original poster
UnluckyCoil · 27/04/2023 12:47

Yes so they gave their excuses, and ended with a ‘must get another date in soon’ and yeah that was that.

Hey ho. Makes you realise who your real friends are.

OP posts:
FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 27/04/2023 12:51

But what were the excuses? Were they together?

Shitsville123 · 27/04/2023 12:53

I cannot stand let downs. If I say I'm coming to something there has to be a genuine and really be reason why I don't turn up. They are just wasters OP.

Throwncrumbs · 27/04/2023 12:54

MakingTheVeganYorkshirePud · 02/04/2023 00:33

Speaking to someone on the phone is extremely personal for some people. It's totally distracting and really hard to even understand the conversation if you are unable to see their face.

The point is she communicated with her friends and asked them to come to her house. She communicated via text to see if they were still coming. As far as we know now, NO RESPONSE.

If that's the case, they've let the OP down, not the other way around.

You can’t see their face if you text either😃😂

Original poster
UnluckyCoil · 27/04/2023 12:56

One had a migraine and the other has missed the last bus

OP posts:
withlovefromlou · 27/04/2023 13:04

I’m so sorry to hear they let you down, OP. I was really hoping they’d turned up and that you’d all had a lovely evening 😔

Stardustkid · 27/04/2023 13:26

Wow! I thought you were never coming back although I wish the response was more positive. People are just awful

GeorgeGerald · 27/04/2023 13:36

That is really shit of them @UnluckyCoil

Well, they've shown you who they are. Even if their excuses were true the not telling you until 15 mins after they were supposed to be at yours...

I've had a 'friend' a bit like that a couple of years ago. Last time she arranged something I just knew she wouldn't turn up. I didn't chase her at all - just left it. Two days later she got in contact with a 'sorry' and did I want to meet up. Nope. Bumped into her fairly recently and we had a nice impromptu chat, she suggested coffee at a later date and I changed the subject. Acquaintance for a nice impromptu chat - great. Friend? Absolutely not.

321user123 · 27/04/2023 15:41

UnluckyCoil · 27/04/2023 12:47

Yes so they gave their excuses, and ended with a ‘must get another date in soon’ and yeah that was that.

Hey ho. Makes you realise who your real friends are.

Wow. Those are definitely not your friends.

Robinni · 27/04/2023 16:22

She’s here! Scrolls to read. So sorry they didn’t come OP. What a pack of bitches. We all showed though!! X

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 27/04/2023 17:28

OP I'm pleased you're ok. Your friends sound like bitches. It's hard as I know how you feel but please don't give them the headspace. Feel free to message

ThreeRingCircus · 27/04/2023 18:12

What bitches. How rude of them, I'm annoyed on your behalf! I wouldn't bother with them again, they're clearly not worth your time.

aibutohavethisusername · 27/04/2023 18:28

Sorry to read that they didn’t turn up. You’re better off without them.

ilovesushi · 27/04/2023 19:44

Those friends are shit, but if it is any comfort you had the world of MN rooting for you x

RogerTheTodger · 27/04/2023 19:49

Crap friends, OP. They'll probably let one another down in due course, while you'll be off having good times with better friends.

CambsAlways · 27/04/2023 20:12

Glad you came back to give us an update op! Sorry they didn’t show up! What awful so called friends, I would sack them both off! I actually don’t believe their excuses you are worth more

northernsunshine · 28/04/2023 04:19

Thanks for the update @UnluckyCoil that sucks but as you say, hey ho! You’re better off for knowing their true feelings.

I’ve been through this myself and it’s a horrible feeling. I’m convinced it’s becoming a societal issue where people are too self involved to be good friends.

Notbeingdismissive · 28/04/2023 09:39

UnluckyCoil · 27/04/2023 12:47

Yes so they gave their excuses, and ended with a ‘must get another date in soon’ and yeah that was that.

Hey ho. Makes you realise who your real friends are.

I'd delete their numbers. Say nothing but just be 'busy' whenever they want to do something.

Never contact them first and give low effort responses if they do.

MenoRageisReal · 28/04/2023 12:22

Sorry they were so shit OP. Move on to better friends I'd say!

Woopzies · 28/04/2023 23:53

I feel like we need to make sure that everyone in the last 20 pages of replies has now seen the update. A lot of people have waited a month for this. 😅

cannockcandy · 01/05/2023 18:08

@UnluckyCoil What absolute BS, sorry none of them came through for you. It's something that, as an adult, seems to be a regular occurrence that I deal with. It's totally crap and really sucks!
Hugs hun! Just know you had over 100 strangers behind you and we all support you and declare them the AH's! Xx

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