Is it ever ok to steal?

[Kayem458]

Went to do my food shopping early yesterday morning to get it out of the way. Arrived at 7, left at 7.30. Checked my bank this morning, my card was used twice in the shop, I’d paid for my shopping and gone home. My amount was showing as pending and a second amount for £21.35, called the bank first thing both were contactless payments (I’ve obviously left my card accidentally on the machine it was a self serve checkout). Bank confirmed card was used at 7.39 so whoever went to that self serve after me used it. Bank we’re fine and raised it as fraud however I spoke to two advisors, both were lovely and helpful might I add, but the first one said ‘well times are hard for people with cost of living crisis’ and the second said ‘at least it was only 20 quid could have been more’.

I’m going to the store today to give them the exact time for their cctv and I’m also calling 101. Is it just me or does anyone else agree that stealing is stealing no matter the amount? I have really struggled financially in the past and not been able to afford food, heating, bills etc that ‘20 quid’ would have needed to last me a good few weeks, the nights I’ve gone to bed hungry and stealing never crossed my mind! I’m pretty annoyed that the attitude to this is quite throw away, or is this just life now and it’s me overreacting?

I think it is really annoying that the people you reported it too OP seem to just shrug it off as normal because if everyone goes that way we won’t want to trust anyone. We need some standards of honesty. Absolutely agree that we should be helping people who don’t have enough to eat, but not through condoning stealing.

Of course accidentally leaving your card behind is not equivalent to deliberating stealing money in a found card. One was a mishap, the other a choice. I do not think stealing is ever right because once you say something is an exception where do you draw the line? Thank you for story of Costa staff. Heartening.

Perfectly put.

I work in a large supermarket and there is a lot of theft. Despite the idea that people are stealing to feed their families this in the most part isn't true. People do not steal the basics they steal stuff they can sell on, booze, joints of meat, baby milk. They don't just take one or two they usually take more.
One of the favourite ways to steal is to simply cut through the self scan machines with a trolley full of shopping, or to scan it all put it in the trolley then tap a card on the reader and walk off so it looks as if you have paid contact less. These are rarely a trolley with a weeks worth of shopping, they are always over £200 rarely if ever have any budget range goods in.

To answer your question, yes, I do believe that in some cases stealing in the right thing to do. This is not your case though.

Are you joking? If I saw a bank card left at a checkout I would take it to information desk for them to try and return it. As i assume most normal people would. Not steal someone else's money.
What an utterly bizarre take on it.

It's a case by case thing I think. Your circumstances no, it was wrong for someone to use your card but I'm struggling to understand how you left your card on the machine if you did contactless. Did you just put it to the side to pack and forgot?

Anyway, I've seen people stealing food from supermarkets and I honestly just turn a blind eye.

Thank god you checked your online banking OP. I’m glad your getting it back and it (hopefully) hasn’t left you short. I don’t think stealing is ok, certainly not a bank card and money.
I’ve walked away and left my purse before at the self checkout. I had a lovely teenager chase me up Tesco car park waving my purse 😂 I did give him a tenner for his honesty, it’s a bloody shame not everyone behaves that way!

No it's not ok but they were possibly trying to keep calm rather than going OH MY GOD YOUVE BEEN ROBBED. And help you feel a bit better about the situation.

I've found bank cards. I've always handed it to the nearest person in authority.

Chances are its an opportunitist not necessarily someone in actual need.

I've also left my bank card in a shop where it has been kept safe until I've returned. So obviously other people are honest too.

Undoubtedly there are people who are struggling but unfortunately some unprincipled people can’t resist the idea of getting something for nothing.

I might be a terrible person but from some experience I wouldn't think "it's for baby" forst, but "re-sell, eh"

I think it is really annoying that the people you reported it too OP seem to just shrug it off as normal

But if they were fraud advisors at the OP's bank, then it is their normal, because that's what they spend their working day dealing with. I wouldn't expect them to sound shocked or disapproving, any more than I would need the police to tut about depravity if I'd reported a burglary. It's their day to day job. I didn't expect the credit card person I spoke to after discovering my Amazon account had been hacked and £1000 of camera equipment bought in my name and delivered to an address in south London to be as outraged as I was!

the first one said ‘well times are hard for people with cost of living crisis’

This makes no sense. If times are hard then don’t go using someone’s card!

You might well be comfortable (still not ok), but what if that was your last £20 and you now can’t feed your kids? People are so selfish and thoughtless and I have less sympathy for their struggles when they knowingly could be putting other other people in the shit.

It’s never ok but sometimes it is understandable.

leaving your bank card unattended, your car unlocked, your wallet sitting in a bench, your iPad on a cafe table, your phone at rhe bus stop,then of course you run the risk of theft. Not everyone is a good person.

the advisors weren’t excusing it. But contactless has a lot more than 20 quid available for most people so could have been worse,and yes with the col crisis more people are tempted as they are financially struggling so they could be seeing an increase in this

the poster who was heinously attacked for saying you bare some responsibility, someone even accused her of likening it to rape victims and told her to fuck off, another couple sensed a pile on and ran in to give her a kick, had a point, we do bear a responsibility to protect our valuables.

Baby milk is something you get given extra money for if you are on a low income, so really isn't something the vast majority of people need to steal to feed their child.

People steal formula to sell to feed their older children. Or a heroin habit. Or both

Ethically it’s not that black and white.

In some situations it would be the ethical thing to do. This is not one of them though.

People steal formula to sell to feed their older children. Or a heroin habit. Or both

Yes they might, most definitely do for your 2nd point, but I would hazard a guess the vast majority of people who suddenly find they have to steal to feed their family take small things that can actually feed their family rather than stuff they need to sell on. Many of them won't even know how or where to sell it on. A normally honest person is not going to rock up at school or work selling stolen goods.
Baby milk has been one of the top stolen items for a long time before any cost of living crisis

No it's not. I've seen any number of social media posts saying if you see someone stealing groceries or baby milk, you haven't seen anything. I'm sorry but stealing is stealing, it is wrong and it cannot be excused. If we just let anyone go in and help themselves, the cost of living crisis will just go on longer!

I'm not really disagreeing, but keep in mind that there were people who were struggling to/unable to feed their children long before any cost of living crisis. They have always existed.

I went into a branch of Nationwide to use the cash machine. There was a card left in the machine, mid transaction (so PIN entered) showing a balance of circa £30K!

I stood there looking round - nobody looking bothered. Randomly check floor on the off chance that they've collapsed and I'm standing on them... Surprisingly - no.

So I just clicked cancel, retrieved card and handed it in.

IF I had decided to withdraw something, I'd still be shitting myself now waiting for the karma police to rock up 🤣

This. Shades of grey.

I stole a weeks shop once. 15 years ago when I was a single parent, I had a very careful budget for bills, food shop, travel etc etc. I ordered an online ASDA shop. I had absolutely nothing in the house. Children home from school at 3.30 and at 2.30 I got a call to say my order wasn’t coming (can’t for the life of me remember why) and they’d have to refund me. Fine. Only the refund was going to take five working days!!! Even if I could find a meal that evening I wasn’t going to be able to feed my children breakfast, or any other meals for days. I begged for them to refund me quicker. They wouldn’t. So I went to ASDA and took what I needed. Really didn’t see any other option at the time.

All kids need morals instilling in them to know right from wrong, it's a basic parenting requirement. At no point should parents allow their kids to steal or condone stealing.

Maybe of those two shop lifters, one of them could have been putting a shift in at McDonald's to PAY for the goods instead of STEALING. Stealing is a very slippery slope, you soon will make your self unemployable when you get a criminal record and your offspring will, most likely, be brought up in the same mold.

The human race would be so much better if everyone practiced integrity - Doing the right thing when no one is looking.