If you had your time again, what would you have done after leaving school and up to your 30s or 40s?

[WiltingFlowerz]

Me, in my dream life, would have had great health and would have managed far better throughout education - so I'd have gone straight through university full time instead of part time successfully instead of constantly being sick. Then I'd have moved to London (I did do this) and been amazing in a brilliant job in advertising (didn't do this) and made good money during my twenties, would have had an exciting time and taken my mum away on lots of holidays. Mum died a couple of months ago so not being in a place to treat her means I can't ever do that which makes me sad. We did manage one brilliant trip to Paris.

Anyway, knowing now what you didn't know at 18, if you could go back in time what would you do? What decisions would you make that would streamline your process to get you where you are today? Or would you do something completely different? Careers, babies, travel, relationships?

Or would you change absolutely nothing?

I really need distraction from my grief so please tell me all about the amazing exciting times you have either had, or would have if you could have one more try.

Left the ‘love of my life’ and got pregnant in my 20s or early 30s! Not waited for him to come round to having kids. Sleep
with a random if that did it tbh! I was a love child myself anyhow.

Infertility from 37 onwards sucks 😪

I'd have accepted the place I got on the Phys Ed course I got after applying for it just to fill in all my Cao form. I'd have gone on to be a PE teacher and enjoyed my job nearly as much as my 20 weeks of holidays a year.

Oh, and exercise more - get more dental
cleans and have had my thyroid checked and medicated as soon as it started affecting me, not 10 years later!

No idea honestly. I was pregnant by 17 so this is all I've known.

Been more crazy with hair colours
Slept with more men and more interesting ones - not just the ones identikit all my friends would fancy too
Travelled Europe more
Saved a tiny bit right from first wage
Had my head screwed on from a career perspective from day one as a few good opportunities slipped through my fingers
Nurtured friendships more in the buzz of a new relationships. Hoes over bros and all of that
Been disciplined with keeping fit when I was young enough to have the energy to do it!
Got a tattoo

I would not have done a PhD and would have met someone other than my vile ex husband. Or maybe I would have done the PhD and have carried on with the academically high-flying career that I gave up as soon as I met him. Though I did like being a SAHM, so can't really complain. I would possibly also have had sex with more than one person (I should have taken various opportunities with good friends, as I know ONS are not for me).

I wish I'd have studied harder at university and did a different degree to get me into a decent profession.
However, I did shoot off after university to work in SE Asia where I spent 3 years. I then travelled and worked in several different countries and don't regret these experiences at all (apart from nearly dying of Malaria or being smiled at while nearly being mown down on a crossing in SK).

I got married and had kids starting at 29 and was a SAHM for a few years.
Got back to the workplace but never had a job here that pays that well.
I wish I'd have chosen a different career path so I could be more comfortable now.

Not mucked around going to uni, saved money to buy a house back when they were affordable and probably kept the job I started when my second was only 6 months as I met the lady I trained the other day and she's now the business manager! That could of been me! Oh and dumped the kids deadbeat dad the first time he cheated instead of wasting another 8 years of my life.

Get a job in the travel industry and travel the world

I think I would have just taken more risks in general. Only recently I’ve realised that I’ve always gone for the safe option even when it’s maybe not been what I’ve really wanted. I was always taught safe and secure was better than taking a risk but I feel like I’ve missed out on a lot of chances. I’m very happy with my life now, happily married, nice house, cute baby but I keep having the what if feeling and too afraid to make any changes.

I'm not really sure if I'd do anything differently and I've definitely not done things perfectly 🤣

I would agree with:

• started antidepressants much sooner. I only began them in my late 20s.

I've spent loads of life travelling and not a minute feels wasted.

Choose medicine
being a doctor
married when i was 28-29.

i’m married pretty young at 24. And I haven’t done my masters

Instead of ignoring the immense grief I felt over losing my dad at 17 and gaining double my body weight and focusing too much on work as an avoidance mechanism, I would have got some therapy,lost weight,actively looked for a relationship rather than shunning them till my mid 40s and travelled. Not much really 🤣

Well I'd not have got with my first husband for a start.

I'd have done Economics rather than Modern Languages at uni and gone straight into banking rather than wasting time working in PR and shudder teaching and done something more quantitative/numbers based.

I enjoyed my gap year but I feel like I could have done more with it - perhaps it would have been preferable to do it AFTER uni rather than before.

I would have taken geography and gone on to study environment science at Uni.
I’d’ve travelled during the long summer hols, picking up work as I went.
I would have had higher standards in my choice of men.
I’d’ve gotten a job I liked in nature and lived simply without accumulating so much stuff.
idve learned to dance sooner rather than later.
idve laid my cards on the table when trying to land gorgeous work colleague who gave me the best kiss I’ve ever had in my life.
idve played it cooler with cute German guy.
i probably wouldn’t have married or had kids :( sad that but it’s how I feel. The weight of responsibility for other lives sits hard on my and I feel trapped and tethered even though I love them very much.

Enjoyed University more. Been more confident to travel at a younger age.
Done a masters straight after my degree, when I was used to student housing and little money.
overpaid my pension when I was full time, pre children.
taken my parents on holiday abroad, so they could enjoy it.
spent more time with my parents instead of lots of weeks taken up each year with charity work - now I realise those people just wanted what they could out of my time, my abilities and money and instead spent time with family.
had another child whilst still young enough.

taken up a sport I could enjoy, so I might like fitness - like badminton or gone back to netball,. Fitness and a social life in one!

Back then (1970s) I had no idea you could get a degree in something like textiles or stage design - mind you I wasn't in this country, and my parents had no experience where we were. But it was either fine art or commercial design according to the careers guy and I picked the latter. Actually to go further back I would have worked to get the grades to go to my first choice uni (though I can't even remember what I wanted to study there, but it wasn't creative I'm sure).
Anyway I would have got a degree in that and my career may have taken a whole new direction more in line with what I eventually became passionate about, but you rarely know what you want to do at 16/17, and most likely have not had exposure to most careers anyway.

Pm

Wouldn't have bothered with a levels at all, started yts sooner, I studied part time whilst working full time with education paid for through to post grad level (very sensible!)
Would have ditched the boyfriend though. Big mistake

Bought the biggest flat I could have afforded. Worked double shifts to pay it down as fast as possible. Then re-mortgaged as soon as possible and bought another one. Rinse and repeat for ten years. Then sell up and retire to the country.

So many things!

I would have got married and had children in mid twenties instead of early thirties, and had four instead of two.

Got a dog much sooner!!

Came here to say this too. If I had my time again I’d avoid teaching like the fucking plague.

Chosen a job closer to home. Any job.

Wouldn't change anything except to have met my late DH a few years earlier, in my early, not late 30s. Not to do with having more children, more of him.