To feel ashamed, embarrassed and not know how to fix this?

[Avatarthewayofwater]

I've taken the image from Google as I'm far to embarrassed to take a picture of myself.

Any weight I gain goes on my stomach and due to emotional binge eating I find myself here.

I did have ultrasound scans to check nothing underlying was going on, but no its visceral fat and only I can get rid if it.

The problem is I've changed my diet completely and calorie counting and eating healthy along with exercise. Yet nothing has changed stomach wise.

I'm so self conscious and I can't wear normal clothes because I constantly look pregnant.

Even at the gym I hide in a big hoodie so no one can see.

It's making me depressed and I don't know how to get rid of the stomach fat.

Has anyone else been like this and managed? I had a c section years ago and have an underactive thyroid if that makes any difference.

Please be kind...

Cardio is absolutely not pointless. It has amazing benefits for weight loss, the heart, immune system, mental health, skin, muscles and basically the entire body.

However, in terms of pure weight loss it has to be in conjunction with calorie deficit if you want to lose body fat. I remember an episode of secret eaters where a woman was running an hour a day and not losing weight- she was completely baffled. Turned out every time she'd come back from a run she'd eat an entire packet of chocolate hobnobs. She believed that if you ate within an hour of vigorous cardio it "didnt count". It was all a bit silly but its true that cardio without diet changes/healthy eating wont really help with weight loss.

Somebody upthread said that using the gym for the treadmill was a waste of time and money, but I may have misunderstood and they might have meant the walking specifically wasn't enough.

The YouTube videos sound great - is there anyone in particular you could recommend, please?

Any exercise is always better than none. The most important thing, I think, is to find the ones you enjoy and feel good at, that’s when you keep at it.
sadly I can’t recommend anyone now as my journey was 10 years ago plus now.

sometines gyms do offers, half price and no joining fee and they include a few PT lessons (I signed my son up for this here recently energie they were called but sure many do this) , that could make a PT a cheaper option.
buying some kettle bells (heavy not just a kilo) makes any normal exercise harder.

Caroline Garvin is brilliant. Unfortunately she seems to have stopped uploading, I reckon she's probably developing an app, but there's loads and loads of videos on her channel to try. Most use dumbbells, so you can do it at home. If you want to follow a video in the gym but can't stream easily, I follow along to Les Mills on Demand in the gym, as I can download the videos. I just pick a quiet spot, select some dumbbells, and a step (which the trainers use as a bench) put my headphones in, and ignore everyone else. I tend to do that away from the weights area, just because there's more space elsewhere in my gym.

The thing I find with cardio, is that I'm time poor, so I don't have time for both strength training, yoga (I think some sort of mobility/stretching is important), and cardio too. So I get my cardio in whilst doing weights. My heart rate got up to 179bpm in my strength training session yesterday! It's hard work aerobically, as hard as the cross trainer. Some people like to slow it right down so they can lift heavier, but working hard getting a sweat on works for me, and I've made lots of strength gains that way. I do do a lot of walking though, if I didn't, I'd probably need to try and squeeze in some cardio sessions, just to up my activity.

I’m a size 8-10 put on weight due to having kids mainly on my stomach, my stomach was always a sort of b shape to be honest always some fat at the bottom , after my second and final child I went and got a bbl and lipo and my stomach had never been flatter I honestly think we just carry weight differently even when I was younger and a size 4-6 my stomach was never this flat! During the last trimester of pregnancy your body will create more fat cells around your stomach to protect the baby more it was the only area I had a problem with and it was due to being pregnant twice I know you said you can’t afford it but it’s either that or carry on with the exercising and accepting your new body shape after having kids.

Have you been checked for insulin resistance? I had so much trouble losing weight, I exercised 3 times a week ate well but was so hard to shift. I had a fasting test and it was discovered I was IR. Started metformin and around 3 months later the weight started shifting. I still exercise, I still eat well (healthy) I do eat chocolate occasionally and I'm 16lbs down now.

Sorry @porculime , she's Caroline Girvan, not Garvin. Thinking about it, I actually think Alice Liveing is better for beginners. Something like this is good:

I also love Laura Hoggins. I was introduced to her via the FiiT app.

This. I was put on metformin due to my pcos and struggling to conceive. The weight dropped off me. Now ive had a baby I can't take it anymore... and the weight isn't shifting.

It could be possible this is caused by a diastasis recti. It’s usually caused by pregnancy. The abdominal muscles stretch & don’t go back together which can cause a bulge & make you look pregnant. Don’t quote me as I’m not a doctor.

I had one, caused so much back ache & indigestion issues surprisingly. But there’s stomach workouts you can do that can knit the muscles back together. (Assuming it is that) & it worked for me luckily.

But I could be completely wrong btw. I’m sure there’s a way to check if you have one. By laying on your back & seeing how many fingers you can fit in between your abdominal muscles. I can’t remember precisely. But I hope you get the problem sorted.

I did a weight lifting session yesterday and at one point, my BPM was 176!! The reason I am sharing is to illustrate that weight training raises the heart rate in exactly the same way cardio does. However, and most importantly, it keeps it elevated longer and means you continue to burn fat. Also, weight training builds muscle, something that neither the cross trainer nor treadmill does, and maintaining muscle mass is so important as we age.

You don't need to use the machines, free weights are a great way to weight train (or even just stick to resistance training with bands). But free weights, particularly compound moves like deadlifts are the best as they work all the big muscle groups simultaneously. Even just one session with a PT will show you the correct form and definitely worth the investment.

I lost around 15 kilos (or perimenopause weight gain) by lifting heavy weights and eating in a calorie deficit/counting macros. The only traditional cardio I did was walking (13,000-20,000 steps per day) and I swam a few times a week, always breast stroke and at a v. v. v. leisurely pace.

Try not to think of it as dieting but you’ll have to reduce your food intake and exercise more even if it’s taking walks. Use smaller plates, cook smaller portions and shop with this in mind so no junk food purchases. Even if you try to limit your sugar intake that’ll work - so only natural sugars from fruits but not from choccies, cakes, snacks etc. Lastly if you drink then maybe sometimes try only water- not the easiest but it helps.

Few things you need to get the doctor to check (my daughter has same problem and is undergoing tests, she also is on levothyroxine ) ask for a coeliac test to see if you can't tolerate gluten, also it may seem strange question but has your face shape changed over the few months/years and/or have you developed a lot of stretch marks on your tummy? Reason i ask is Addison disease can cause belly to look like you say yours does and it can develop at anytime or can be caused by a small cyst on the adrenal gland (most are usually found incidentally on a routine ct scan). You might have answered this already but if you still have periods are they heavy or even just extremely painful? If yes you need to get endometriosis ruled out and a ultrasound can't rule out the possibility as quite often it won't show up on that, so a gynaecologist might decide to check via laproscope.
Good luck i hope you get some answers.

Have you looked into inositol or berberine? Berberine has helped me hugely as doctor won’t prescribe metaformin.

I could have written this myself.

It's truly one of life's bastard truths that, for many of us, stomach fat is the last to go.

Just keep working hard and trust that eventually it will start to reduce.

Also maybe go gluten free for a few weeks, it may be partial bloating.

Six pack revolution. It's murder for 75 days, but it works.

I'm 54 years old and just laughed out loud at 'organ meat' 🙈

An underactive thyroid and a C-section do make a difference. Exercise alone will not make your tum go away, sadly. Go to your GP and ask if he/she thinks you would be well-advised to go to a slimming group - the support and the guidance make such groups very helpful. I have joined one and have lost over a stone in weight since last August (slow and stead is recommended) and can get into clothes that did not fit at Christmas - and I have enjoyed doing it, never felt hungry, and never felt deprived of food I like. The NHS will pay for membership of such a group if your doctor prescribes one. The two major groups in the UK both advise on diet, on slow weight loss and on learning to change your eating and exercise regimes and they do this whilst showing how to cook interesting, tasty and nutritious food and making you feel good about what you are doing, with no nastiness about 'failure'. They also will take into account medical conditions. Don't be unhappy and don't despair.

I carry my fat around my middle too. The only thing that zaps my belly fat is eating whole foods with high protein, hiit classes and lifting heavier weights. Of course everyone is different and it is really hard to shift the fat around the bottom of the stomach when we have this body type! But it does slowly work.

It might be worth checking if you have diastasis recti (ab separation) following pregnancy (ies). A woman’s health physio can help with this. I would add in 3 resistance training sessions to your exercise programme. Can be body weight only if you don’t have the equipment at home (resistance bands are cheap). Or Body pump type classes if you are a gym member. Up your protein in each meal too. The resistance work is key to changing body shape.

Are you weighing your food? If not, start. It's SO easy to underestimate how much you're eating. For a short person just an extra 200 calories could mean the difference between losing and maintaining.

Also the general wisdom is not to eat back your exercise calories, it's too unreliable and inaccurate to really judge how much you've burned. See above for the lack of a defecit for just an accidental 200 extra calories.

Don't be disheartened. Slow, steady and consistent and you'll see changes. And weigh your food!!

i should add, do a full body approach if doing 3x PW. rather than split routines legs & core, etc). Means you hit the muscles several times per week. 48hrs rest in-between for muscles to repair (and grow). If you can afford to hire a PT for a few sessions for guidance that would help too.

Stop dieting and just switch one meal per day to either a sandwich, salad or a soup that is not cream based and not child friendly. So, no chicken and noodles, no ramen. Things like chicken noodle with vegetables, beef and vegetables. Something with lots of broth and veggies. (get low sodium if that is an issue or make your own and freeze portions). You will have to make sure that you don't increase snack eating of junk food, this only works if you eat as you usually do (or eat even more plant based). Another change could also be to buy frozen fruit and yogurts and when you feel the urge for a sweet frozen snack, stick the fruit and some yogurt and a bit of milk or water in a blender and make a smoothie as thick as you want. The thicker it is, the sweeter it will taste.
The sandwich should have minimal cheese or condiments, some meat, and then lettuce, tomato, sprouts, sliced cucumbers or pickles, etc. Just, try to think of cheese and meat as being the addition to your vegetable sandwich instead of as the main ingredient. For the salads, add a boiled egg or two, or some cooked chicken and less often, some cooked ham. These should be roasted or pan-fried. No coated and fried. And whatever dressing you want, just not a ton of it. I even have croutons.
This will work better if you do all three so you don't get bored. But, if you do better eating just one, make sure that if you do sandwiches you get healthier bread. Like, not white bread, at least not all the time.
Reduce eating out if that is an issue.
Get some dark chocolate (unless you cannot stand at all) for those candy cravings and hard candies for sugar cravings. Hard candy takes longer to consume than soft ones. Just don't have them next to you or you will eat without noticing.
If you have a craving for crisps, eat some. If it is still there, cook a potato in the microwave and eat it with some salt and pepper, or some salsa or other lower calorie topping. Or, if using something high calorie, use only enough for a taste.
I am sure others have great snacks as well. I like carrot sticks with a little ranch, or celery with peanut butter.
I will also take a half serving of some chocolate protein shake and put it in a blender with some ice for chocolate ice cream cravings. They have other flavors as well.
shelled nuts are good too, you can't eat as many because you have to remove the shell.
These are just things I do when I am being disciplined. I won't say it is super easy, but it is easier than dieting and I was never hungry, and I lost about 50lbs (about 23kilo) over 6 months.

Do you just need to tone your muscles? Sit ups, plank etc?