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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel ashamed, embarrassed and not know how to fix this?

468 replies

Avatarthewayofwater · 25/03/2023 18:51

I've taken the image from Google as I'm far to embarrassed to take a picture of myself.

Any weight I gain goes on my stomach and due to emotional binge eating I find myself here.

I did have ultrasound scans to check nothing underlying was going on, but no its visceral fat and only I can get rid if it.

The problem is I've changed my diet completely and calorie counting and eating healthy along with exercise. Yet nothing has changed stomach wise.

I'm so self conscious and I can't wear normal clothes because I constantly look pregnant.

Even at the gym I hide in a big hoodie so no one can see.

It's making me depressed and I don't know how to get rid of the stomach fat.

Has anyone else been like this and managed? I had a c section years ago and have an underactive thyroid if that makes any difference.

Please be kind...

To feel ashamed, embarrassed and not know how to fix this?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
Itstillgoeson · 26/03/2023 18:35

Are you drinking enough water/have you cut out all sugar traps like fruit juice?Can you do pilates - start with a few minutes a day and build up - as this will strengthen your core.Don't give up, as it will improve if you are exercising and eating healthily.

Cantonet · 26/03/2023 18:36

Do you have artificial sweeteners?
They caused massive stomach bloat for me. They wipe out all the healthy bacteria in the stomach. Also have you had an episode of severe food positioning? That can really upset your stomach bacteria & cause long term conseqyences. Have you tried probiotics? Maybe fermented foods can help too? I follow the Zoe programme on instagram & there's lots of tips & recipes for healthy eating posted on there.

Soapyspuds · 26/03/2023 18:41

I would swap the breakfast out. Fruit and yoghurt is just a shit load of simple sugars. Go for porridge and perhaps a small sprinkling of fruit. It will result in less of an insulin spike and keep you going longer.

When training try and do HIIT and free weights.

Soapyspuds · 26/03/2023 18:41

And please please do not do any intermittent fasting. It is not a long term solution. Trust me on this.

mandlerparr · 26/03/2023 18:44

Is your stomach hard or soft? Because I have a hard part of my stomach that I will only ever be able to get rid of with surgery because it is a lipoma. Looking it up, it says they can be soft as well. Mine just happens to be hard. It can't be seen on ultrasound (I did mine as well) because it is basically just fat that is now encased in it is own little home. They will not go away with diet or exercise. It looks like surgery or liposuction is the only way to get rid of them. Not saying this is what you have, and they are generally cosmetic only.

tracylamont13 · 26/03/2023 18:46

Hello, Do you drink? Giving up alcohol made a difference for me.

HazelBite · 26/03/2023 18:48

When was your underactive Thyroid diagnosed?(takes a long time to get your levels right)
I can sympathise with you as after a twin birth and Csection and an underactive thyroid, I suffered for years with the very fat tum.
During lockdown my weight soared (again) but early 2021 I was in a lot of pain and the DR decided that it was gallbladder problems and to have a totally fat free diet until it could be treated. It was not easy but the weight and especially the belly fat went. I now hate eating anything remotely oily or fatty and the weight has stayed off.
When I think of all the sustained dieting and excercising I have done over the years and it was going completely fat free that got rid of the belly fat.
I don't know OP it may work for you but it is very hard initially to do.

AmIEnough · 26/03/2023 18:49

Try cutting carbs and sugar. You can eat so much veg and it will make a world of difference

Ellieeyeballs · 26/03/2023 19:17

Hi op, I hope this helps as it did for me, however this was about 9 years ago and the system may have changed…
I went to GP and got a referral for this healthy eating programme, which involves group meetings. I didn’t think I would be comfortable with this, but literally everyone felt the same and I made some good friends. This referral also included me being able to go to the gym for something like £1 a session and a personal trainer helped to set me up with a routine, which I was able to discuss with him each week. Every session he took my weight, waist size etc and then could adjust the routine if necessary to what I felt able and comfortable to do. I had also given birth via c-section around 6 months before this and was at my absolute heaviest, but this really helped me. I think it was called the healthy living programme, but again this may have changed or may have only been in my area, but it’s worth asking your GP again if there is anything like that you can be referred for.
Good luck with your journey, I know it’s so tiresome and depressing at times, but I have come a long way now and so there is hope and a light at the end of the tunnel 😘

mini1275 · 26/03/2023 19:17

I had a tummy like that I now have cancer and a flat stomach wouldn’t recommend it

Thinking2022 · 26/03/2023 19:19

this is what I have been told - reduce carbs, increase protein and do planks and weight training. This has some tips (although you may be too young for menopause it may help) www.saga.co.uk/magazine/health-wellbeing/diet-nutrition/weight-loss/lose-the-meno-pot

Purpl · 26/03/2023 19:26

I also similar shape but can lose it through good food and excercise. I suffer from food intolerances and I think you may too. Also it’s possible if u ever have bad food poisoning u still have parasites in yiur stomach. I strongly suggest that you Google health angels Bexley Kent. Rejuotox. They really sorted me out. If that’s not your area ask for Vanessa to see if she knows a qualified person in yiur area.
def look into food intolerance. Good luck x

YDBear · 26/03/2023 19:31

5/2. On the two fast days be really hard on yourself. You might feel hungry but just remember this is natural and has been how most people have felt throughout history. Hunger is not something you must do something about. DO NOT SNACK, ever. It took about two years but I lost three stone this way. Still do 5/2 now, not so much to lose weight but to stop putting it back on (both DP and I seriously love eating and hate faff. So instead of counting calories and the like we eat whatever we like for 5 days and just have a bit of fruit on the other 2.)

Ozzie2020 · 26/03/2023 19:34

Hey, I was in the same situation, tried calorie counting, exercised loads and nothing worked, literally didn’t shift a pound. And then I went low carb, ditched sugar plus I only eat in an 8 hour window. It has worked wonders, I’m down a stone since Oct. I’m 42 and it was suggested to me that as we age our bodies tolerate carbs and sugar less. It’s a very doable way of eating.

BrummiMummi · 26/03/2023 19:40

If you can afford it, invest in a good Personal Trainer to show you the basics of weightlifting- it really is a game changer! If not check out Emily Skye fitness for some good body weight home workouts to get you started. She is very inspiring as she is very real and has posted her pregnancy journey

Original poster
Avatarthewayofwater · 26/03/2023 19:41

I miss read the price of the PT at my local gym, it is £120 for 4 sessions not £220.
So I have booked in to start next Sunday.

In the meantime I'm going to try and get up early tomorrow and go to the gym before work. Might try spinning to start with.

Will have grapes and yoghurt for breakfast. Then for lunch 2 eggs for scrambled eggs, steamed mixed veg and a tin of tuna.
Then for tea 2 pork chops with mixed veg.

Does that sound healthy enough?

I also have plain cashew nuts to snack on.

OP posts:
Original poster
Avatarthewayofwater · 26/03/2023 19:42

mini1275 · 26/03/2023 19:17

I had a tummy like that I now have cancer and a flat stomach wouldn’t recommend it

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you are doing okay x

OP posts:
NIparty · 26/03/2023 19:43

I would try to add in more protein. It helps keep you fuller for longer, has a higher thermic effect so you burn calories while digesting it, it will stop you losing muscle mass while you're in a deficit and will help you gain muscle if you're weightlifting

Original poster
Avatarthewayofwater · 26/03/2023 19:43

tracylamont13 · 26/03/2023 18:46

Hello, Do you drink? Giving up alcohol made a difference for me.

I rarely drink at all. Maybe 10 drinks per year.

OP posts:
ladymaiasura · 26/03/2023 19:43

Haven’t rtft but have you looked at Lucy Wyndham Read’s standing abs exercises on YouTube? They are all free, quick to do, and really do make a difference. She has a challenge on this month focussing on reducing visceral belly fat. Have a look at her website and her social media pages. She also has lots of advice on healthy eating (focusing on real food instead of supplements which really aren’t needed - with the exception of vitamin d if you are in the UK). I would advise trying one of her ab routines every day plus 10k steps. Do it for a week. Measure your waist at the start and finish and see if it works for you.

Original poster
Avatarthewayofwater · 26/03/2023 19:44

HazelBite · 26/03/2023 18:48

When was your underactive Thyroid diagnosed?(takes a long time to get your levels right)
I can sympathise with you as after a twin birth and Csection and an underactive thyroid, I suffered for years with the very fat tum.
During lockdown my weight soared (again) but early 2021 I was in a lot of pain and the DR decided that it was gallbladder problems and to have a totally fat free diet until it could be treated. It was not easy but the weight and especially the belly fat went. I now hate eating anything remotely oily or fatty and the weight has stayed off.
When I think of all the sustained dieting and excercising I have done over the years and it was going completely fat free that got rid of the belly fat.
I don't know OP it may work for you but it is very hard initially to do.

I was diagnosed about 6 year ago so have been on a steady dose now for quite a while.

OP posts:
NIparty · 26/03/2023 19:44

Lidl do amazing high protein yoghurts. I have the vanilla quark one with 30g of the lidl high protein granola and some fruit and its only 330 calories total while having 33g of protein

ladymaiasura · 26/03/2023 19:49

Avatarthewayofwater · 26/03/2023 19:41

I miss read the price of the PT at my local gym, it is £120 for 4 sessions not £220.
So I have booked in to start next Sunday.

In the meantime I'm going to try and get up early tomorrow and go to the gym before work. Might try spinning to start with.

Will have grapes and yoghurt for breakfast. Then for lunch 2 eggs for scrambled eggs, steamed mixed veg and a tin of tuna.
Then for tea 2 pork chops with mixed veg.

Does that sound healthy enough?

I also have plain cashew nuts to snack on.

This does not sound like enough food. Also, there is no need to cut out an entire food group unless there is a medical need. Eat some carbs! This diet is not sustainable.

DaughterofZion · 26/03/2023 20:02

FASTING DIET/INTERMITTENT FASTING
Stop alcohol and fizzy drinks
reduce carbs
stop added sugars and artificial sweeteners
weight / resistant training classes instead of cardio

the weight will fall off your tummy

Cosyblankets · 26/03/2023 20:04

I couldn't go to the gym on grapes and yoghurt for breakfast