To think that adults are much less resilient than they used to be

[louease]

First of all I'll admit that I'm on the older side of 60 so the weight of my belt onion could be effecting my judgement on this.

I see a lot on social media including here where people say they are upset at words they read on a screen, that they've been triggered, or that it should have a warning attached.

Are we making the world harder to live in by trying to make it too comfortable do you think?

My experience of my parents generation is that they put up and shut up, let their mental health deteriorate, took that deterioration out on their children through smacking, shouting or passive aggressively neglecting or controlling. Never worked through their own shit and even now want to blame their (your?) Children's generation for not being willing to put up with their shit anymore.

I’m sorry you had such inadequate parents @Forgooodnesssakenow.

Not sure how old you are, but that was my experience too.

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.

I agree, I’m 56 and am bemused at some peoples so called problems on here. One was AIBU because my husband ate some of the leftover lasagne that I told him was for the following day, really ffs. I have some real shit to deal with, one of them being my 27 year old daughter has just been diagnosed with a brain tumour, not cancer, thank gawd. She’s also having a hysterectomy in April and has premature ovarian failure. The wait for a neurosurgeon appointment is months away, not even a date yet.

i don’t have facefuck, I don’t need to constantly drip feed my emotions and childish problems with everyone. I just put on my big girl panties and soldier on. Oh I wish I had some of the AIBU problems on here, my life would be so much easier.

Think you need to look more closely at things like car ownership, holidays, seasonal diets, local shopping, introduction of plastic carriers, central heating, chemicals, local working v commuting, clothing purchases, disposable incomes, ownership of labour saving devices.....boomers tended to have one week in Margate type holidays on a train for a start.

That was my experience also

I think a lot of the world today is very overwhelming when you're struggling as its just 24/7 constantness at times.

I am 40

Again very much an example of the generation who can't accept anyone younger than them could possibly have a problem or that any minor problem is worth talking through because look, you've a real problem unlike the rest of us.

Except I have real problems, a child with a serious health condition who has almost died several times, series discrimatoon at work because of time off for sick children, bereavements, personal illness and injury, a long history of infertility... Etc etc

However, unlike the boomer generation I can see that other people's problems are as important to them as mine are to me. You may not have Facebook but you're happy to trauma dump all over this thread to show how resilient you are compared to the eat of us.

It's just not true

unlike the boomer generation I can see that other people's problems are as important to them as mine are to me.

Let me correct that for you unlike some people older than me and some people my own age, I can see that other people's problems are as important to them as mine are to me.

I actually think in some ways there's more resilience in the younger generation in that they face living in a more hostile economy but are more likely to believe their own actions/mindset make a difference. People are a lot more likely to make the most of what they have whereas previous generations who were given more on a plate are more needy/ spoilt and more likely to compare themselves in terms of physical wealth rather than health and happiness. What a lot of people deem 'lack of resilience' is actually people having less tolerance for bigotry and needless social problems like wealth inequality. People are having less of it and it's causing those who cling to outdated mindsets to feel anxious about their daft values. The world is always changing and in another 40 years it'll be another complaint about yet more progress.

Not sure this exactly the thing but here

“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” Mark Twain.

I reckon I am a boomer & we did & my parents before me had / have problems - and still do . I think each generation has their own problems and actually things which get better . I do object to being called some one who fucked up as a generation. ( I paraphrase )

But on a lighter note a chap who was 20 years older than me ( re the onion belt thing - which I have never heard of ) once danced at his NYE party with two onions strapped to a belt under his kilt ( no gentlemanly parts were seen during this episode. ) I am tempted to say "we made our own entertainment in those days " 😊

Well said.

However, unlike the boomer generation I can see that other people's problems are as important to them as mine are to me.

The Boomer generation who pushed for civil justice, you mean? The ones who fought for women’s rights and gay rights and an end to racial discrimination? The Boomer generation who pushed the UK to stop its colonialism and campaigned to end apartheid? That Boomer generation?

Yeah. They were soooo insular.

So which generation is this that didn’t have a hostile economy? The Boomers who lived through the turmoil in the 70s, not to mention many of them being born and spending their formative years in the post war devastation when there was still rationing? The Gen-Xers who grew up and came of age in the long recession in the 80s? The Millennials who had 9/aa change their world and then, in the late 2000s, the deepest recession since quarterly data started being recorded?

None of the generations have escaped significant economic turmoil. We had an unusually long good span from the mid 90s to the late 2000s, but it didn’t serve everyone well, including many Boomers.

high five

Agree. As I always say, it's not much better to stereotype people according to when they were born than according to where they were born.

I just want to know if you have to reach 60 to get a belt onion.

Just where the hell were they to turn??? There was no support or understanding out there. And I speak as a child of the 60s who was regularly beaten for small misdemeanours.

I forgave my parents (although I never forgot) because there was no-one out there to advise and support them as to how they should parent!

I am sorry about what you and your DD are going through, but that doesn't mean that other people don't have their own shit to put up with, even if it's not in the same league.

I love that Philip Larkin poem and it is so apt, generation to generation.

I'm not sure exactly when it began, post-millenium I think - but adults no longer seem to be actual adults.

Most people seem to be stuck at an earlier developmental stage: whiny demanding toddler, for example; a particularly spiteful and narcissistic six-year-old level, or early adolescence.

It drives me bonkers when older generations harp on about how fucking wonderful is was in thier day ...Yadda this Yadda that - bollocks was it . There were more child murders in the 60s than now or possibly ever, certainly by strangers, now let's talk about the wonderful 70s, oh we had the Yorkshire ripper, blackouts, massive strikes that actually bought the country to thier knees and constant power cuts. Probably slightly off topic from the OP but I don't care - life was not better, you weren't more resilient....you just dealt with the shit Infront of you, just like everyone is doing today .

Ha!

That's a joke! Have you ever tried to access any kind of help in that area? If you can't afford to go privately, you're fucked and it's thanks to our lovely government that there's no funding for desperate people to get help.