Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse to leave rented property

314 replies

Boymamabee · 20/03/2023 14:16

I’m having an ethical dilemma thanks to my husband…

I’m heavily pregnant (due a c-section next month) and we’ve been served a two month no-fault notice by our landlord (it’s all valid).

We’re struggling to find rented properties within our price range and although we’re at risk of homelessness, the council can’t guarantee temp accommodation before our notice expires. This makes my husband anxious as he says we have no right to stay in a house we don’t own and it’s unfair on the LL whose sale might fall through.

Places for the same amount of rent, or less, than we currently pay are more rural and would cost more fuel. Many of the local schools don’t have specialised facilities for kids with ASD (think rural schools with 20 students and 2 LSAs) and DS LOVES his school!

This is where it gets tricky…

We’ve been advised that if we stay with family or friends before the LL enacts a court possession order, we could be seen as making ourselves “intentionally homeless”. Likewise if we get ourselves into debt/arrears living somewhere we can’t afford.

I’ve proposed we listen to
their advice and stay put for now, but DH thinks it’s selfish and we’ll naturally find another way to make ends meet. He wants to be out before our contract ends and he feels sorry for the LL who’s going through a divorce.

AIBU?

OP posts:
lollipoprainbow · 16/04/2023 05:59

Boymamabee · 14/04/2023 19:01

Thought I’d update on here instead of starting a new thread. I managed to get hold of the LL and was extremely apologetic and explained our situation. He sounded like he couldn’t care less and started talking about bailiffs and references. Then he talked about how the mortgage has gone up by over £200 and he has kids as well. I’m due a cystectomy and c-section in 3 weeks time and right now we have nowhere to go.

I’m so annoyed with the letting agent. They assured my husband and I that the LL is only wanting to sell to an investor and it’s purely transitional so we wouldn’t be going anywhere. Then they told us we’d be safe for a further 6 months after the sale because laws are changing, etc. Two weeks later they served us notice. I told the LL and he said he had no idea why they would say this as the property was on the market for everyone. It was his other property that was sold to an investor.

That's what the estate agent told me too! I'd be fine it would be marketed to investors only, I'd have months to stay on even after a sale as they can take a while. All lies.

Original poster
Boymamabee · 16/04/2023 06:26

lollipoprainbow · 16/04/2023 05:59

That's what the estate agent told me too! I'd be fine it would be marketed to investors only, I'd have months to stay on even after a sale as they can take a while. All lies.

Show quote history

And unfortunately there’s nothing on paper to hold them accountable.

OP posts:
Greenfairydust · 16/04/2023 08:21

Doesn't that leech of a landlord realise that a pregnant woman soon to give birth should not be thrown out on the streets?

OP frankly at this stage I would stay put.

You are paying the rent and any decent landlord would have negotiated with you to give you time to have the baby and find alternate accommodation in a few months.

I also don't understand the practicalities of this: at the moment the housing market is slow. so even if the flat goes on sale it might take months to find a buyer and then a minimum of say 4 months for the conveyancing/sale to go through. So why the urgency to have you out?

Really tough situation but you have to put yourself and your family first.

Speak to shelter and get advice on the best way for you to be rehoused.

Original poster
Boymamabee · 16/04/2023 09:10

Greenfairydust · 16/04/2023 08:21

Doesn't that leech of a landlord realise that a pregnant woman soon to give birth should not be thrown out on the streets?

OP frankly at this stage I would stay put.

You are paying the rent and any decent landlord would have negotiated with you to give you time to have the baby and find alternate accommodation in a few months.

I also don't understand the practicalities of this: at the moment the housing market is slow. so even if the flat goes on sale it might take months to find a buyer and then a minimum of say 4 months for the conveyancing/sale to go through. So why the urgency to have you out?

Really tough situation but you have to put yourself and your family first.

Speak to shelter and get advice on the best way for you to be rehoused.

He already has a buyer who wants to move in by the summer.

I will contact Shelter again in the week.

OP posts:
Untitledsquatboulder · 16/04/2023 09:35

@Greenfairydust I'd have thought you'd be delighted. The leech of a landlord doesn't want to be a leech any more and now it seems there aren't enough leeches to go round so the OP can't rent privately. Rejoice, what a great outcome.

YouveGotAFastCar · 16/04/2023 09:44

and then a minimum of say 4 months for the conveyancing/sale to go through. So why the urgency to have you out?

I don’t think there’s a delay at the moment on conveyancing - a friends sale and purchase seems to be going through at record speed at the moment, it looks like they’ll be in by mid May, meaning it’ll have taken two months since offers made. Chain of three. Searches were fast, survey was back quickly.

OP I hope Shelter have some advice for you x

Charlieiscool · 16/04/2023 09:51

One of the options you considered when given your two months notice was to sit it out until the council house you somewhere. This is what is likely then. This is what you saw coming by not urgently getting on with your husband’s suggestion in the first place. You will be ok, try not to worry, because at least once the council house you there will be security of sorts so you shouldn’t have to face this during future pregnancies. The situation may not be ideal and your DC may have to change schools but you will survive.

GreenClock · 16/04/2023 10:59

The buyer may “want to be in by the summer” but that is not your problem. Take advice from Shelter.

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 16/04/2023 11:24

Doesn't that leech of a landlord realise that a pregnant woman soon to give birth should not be thrown out on the streets?

So landlords are “leeches”, but you don’t think the OP should be made to leave - meaning they can’t sell up and will have to continue to be a, you know, landlord?

Dial down the drama a bit, eh? The OP is not going to be “thrown on the streets”. She’s had plenty of time to look for somewhere else - she just doesn’t like what she can afford.

Greenfairydust · 16/04/2023 14:06

''He already has a buyer who wants to move in by the summer.

I will contact Shelter again in the week.''

Good luck with Shelter, OP. Hope they can help.

About the buyer: their solicitor won't let them exchange until the property is actually vacant.

Greenfairydust · 16/04/2023 14:10

''@WomanStanleyWoman2 · Today 11:24
Doesn't that leech of a landlord realise that a pregnant woman soon to give birth should not be thrown out on the streets?

So landlords are “leeches”, but you don’t think the OP should be made to leave - meaning they can’t sell up and will have to continue to be a, you know, landlord?

Dial down the drama a bit, eh? The OP is not going to be “thrown on the streets”. She’s had plenty of time to look for somewhere else - she just doesn’t like what she can afford.''

I guess we have different value.

To me the welfare of a pregnant woman who will give birth in a couple of weeks is more important than the need for someone to make even more money.

if that triggers you. Fair enough.

I never said that all landlords are leeches by the way. This one definitely is.

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 16/04/2023 14:46

Did you miss the bit where the landlord is getting divorced? He probably doesn’t have a choice about selling.

I’m not “triggered” at all - I just deal in facts and reality.

ProbablyBU88 · 16/04/2023 16:00

OP you created this situation for yourself. And yes, if he needs to start eviction process, you will never be able to rent from a reputable landlord again. You put all your eggs into this hope for council accommodation so stick it out.

Original poster
Boymamabee · 16/04/2023 16:13

One of the options you considered when given your two months notice was to sit it out until the council house you somewhere. This is what is likely then. This is what you saw coming by not urgently getting on with your husband’s suggestion in the first place. You will be ok, try not to worry, because at least once the council house you there will be security of sorts so you shouldn’t have to face this during future pregnancies. The situation may not be ideal and your DC may have to change schools but you will survive.

I haven’t sat it out. I applied for a 2-bed flat within the first fortnight of being given notice. We didn’t get it. Everywhere else was outside our affordability (council do an affordability test) but husband wanted to apply anyway meaning my mum would have to be our guarantor. Rural properties are cheaper but the fuel to work outweighs the benefits of slightly cheaper rent. We were advised that moving in with family before our notice would make us intentionally homeless which I didn’t want.

OP posts:
Original poster
Boymamabee · 16/04/2023 16:15

@ProbablyBU88 read my last post. I applied for a rental property within the first 2 weeks of being given notice. What I wasn’t prepared to do is make myself intentionally homeless.

OP posts:
Lockheart · 16/04/2023 21:25

Boymamabee · 16/04/2023 16:13

One of the options you considered when given your two months notice was to sit it out until the council house you somewhere. This is what is likely then. This is what you saw coming by not urgently getting on with your husband’s suggestion in the first place. You will be ok, try not to worry, because at least once the council house you there will be security of sorts so you shouldn’t have to face this during future pregnancies. The situation may not be ideal and your DC may have to change schools but you will survive.

I haven’t sat it out. I applied for a 2-bed flat within the first fortnight of being given notice. We didn’t get it. Everywhere else was outside our affordability (council do an affordability test) but husband wanted to apply anyway meaning my mum would have to be our guarantor. Rural properties are cheaper but the fuel to work outweighs the benefits of slightly cheaper rent. We were advised that moving in with family before our notice would make us intentionally homeless which I didn’t want.

You applied for one flat in two weeks?

You need to seriously look at the rural properties. You've said you're going to call the council and beg for temporary accommodation - do you have any idea what that's likely to be? Because I can tell you now you will not want to be in there with a young child, a new born, and recovering from a serious operation.

You need to take hold of this situation instead of waiting around for something to happen. Secure an affordable more rural rental ASAP, and if need be move in with relatives temporarily to bridge the gap. Believe me, this will be lightyears better than temporary council accomodation in "BnBs".

Original poster
Boymamabee · 17/04/2023 07:46

@Lockheart we don't have the option of moving in with relatives. My husband suggested it at the start but his mum (who has a small 2-bed house) made it clear it's not on the cards due to her partner's health issues (he needs the spare room).

The rural properties are too expensive with the cost of fuel to work and school (that's if we get it). My mum no longer works as she's a carer for my sibling and receives UC and carer's allowance herself. Even my husband's given up now.

OP posts:
lollipoprainbow · 25/04/2023 11:19

How's it going OP? I haven't even managed to view anything yet let alone secure something! I'm so worried it's a nightmare.

Blondeshavemorefun · 25/04/2023 11:30

How further out are the properties. How much extra petrol costs are we talking

Renting and being further away or renting a smaller property so a 2 bed if need be and kids share in months to come

Is far better then being in temp accommodation. For maybe 6/12/18mths which could be miles away from school /where you are now

Plus squeezed prob into one room

MacarenaMacarena · 25/04/2023 14:21

Boymamabee · 16/04/2023 16:13

One of the options you considered when given your two months notice was to sit it out until the council house you somewhere. This is what is likely then. This is what you saw coming by not urgently getting on with your husband’s suggestion in the first place. You will be ok, try not to worry, because at least once the council house you there will be security of sorts so you shouldn’t have to face this during future pregnancies. The situation may not be ideal and your DC may have to change schools but you will survive.

I haven’t sat it out. I applied for a 2-bed flat within the first fortnight of being given notice. We didn’t get it. Everywhere else was outside our affordability (council do an affordability test) but husband wanted to apply anyway meaning my mum would have to be our guarantor. Rural properties are cheaper but the fuel to work outweighs the benefits of slightly cheaper rent. We were advised that moving in with family before our notice would make us intentionally homeless which I didn’t want.

OP you can see staying with family in 2 different ways... A chance to save several months worth of rent and bills which will be a brilliant nest egg to start a new rental with eg £4,000 in the bank can provide an extra £300 per month to make up the increased rent for over a year... This way you'll be going forward in a property you like and are happy in. Voluntary homelessness won't come into play because you will have lifted yourself out of that situation by choosing to stay with family while it helps you. The traumatic eviction, homeless label, hostel for ages, eventual council house 100 miles away option isn't necessarily the safest one for you and your family. Please think about the stay with family for a few months option - your perspective on this tricky situation is key. Good luck xx

Original poster
Boymamabee · 26/04/2023 08:52

@lollipoprainbow same. There’s one property we’re hoping to view but the problem is we’re not appealing to landlords. DH hasn’t even been in his job for 6 months and is still on probation (he took the job for slightly higher pay and more security), and I had to leave my job before Christmas and claim UC because of pregnancy-related complications (hence the c-section). Basically it’s a small catering business and I wasn’t entitled to sick pay or maternity. We’re a low income family but previously we've always been able to rent and get by due to living in a relatively cheap area (although that’s changing).

I know people think I’m being fussy but specialist provision for my son at school is essential to us. Our housing officer has been supportive of this.

Staying with immediate family would be the last resort if we end up literally roofless. My mum is a full time carer for my sibling who has mental health and drug issues. The back room has a massive damp problem. It’s not a suitable environment.

On top of that, the landlord told us that if we’re not out by the time our notice has expired he’ll withhold references and contact his solicitor immediately for a CCP order. I don’t care at this point, I’ve given up!

OP posts:
Greenfairydust · 26/04/2023 09:04

So sorry you are going through all this while you are about to give birth.

I think you know that you will have to overstay and let your landlord go through the legal eviction process and then the council will have to rehouse you. No reason for you to make yourself homeless at this stage...

Citizen Advice should be able to help you on dealing with the landlord threats and explaining what will happen with the legal process. Continue to pay your rent in the meantime and maintain the property so at least the landlord can't claim that you failed to pay or trashed the house.

And don't feel like you have to justify yourself to people here.

None of them are in your shoes or will provide you with any help, so you have to put yourself and your family first.

People should not have to resort to ignoring notices to vacate but because of the lack of affordable housing provision and the ludicrous private system for many it is the only option. Also the silly system that the council will only help a family once they have received an eviction notice...the system itself means that people will choose to overstay.

Best of luck with whatever you choose to do.

TennisWithDeborah · 26/04/2023 10:10

Greenfairydust · 26/04/2023 09:04

So sorry you are going through all this while you are about to give birth.

I think you know that you will have to overstay and let your landlord go through the legal eviction process and then the council will have to rehouse you. No reason for you to make yourself homeless at this stage...

Citizen Advice should be able to help you on dealing with the landlord threats and explaining what will happen with the legal process. Continue to pay your rent in the meantime and maintain the property so at least the landlord can't claim that you failed to pay or trashed the house.

And don't feel like you have to justify yourself to people here.

None of them are in your shoes or will provide you with any help, so you have to put yourself and your family first.

People should not have to resort to ignoring notices to vacate but because of the lack of affordable housing provision and the ludicrous private system for many it is the only option. Also the silly system that the council will only help a family once they have received an eviction notice...the system itself means that people will choose to overstay.

Best of luck with whatever you choose to do.

Well said!

lollipoprainbow · 26/04/2023 11:48

@Boymamabee sorry to hear that, I'm on a low income too so also not appealing to landlords especially when they can pick and choose form a whole load of potential tenants! I'm hoping someone might take pity on me and choose me as a tenant but I won't hold my breath !!