AIBU?
Does anyone else hate Mother’s Day?
FlatWhite2 · 19/03/2023 13:05
I have to start this by saying I have no real reason to hate Mother’s Day. My mum is still alive, I have a good relationship with her. I have 2 beautiful kids I love. But I cannot abide the endless Instagram/Facebook devotions to people’s wives. I’m probably jealous, my husband doesn’t use social media a huge amount and wouldn’t be the type to publicly declare this anyway, but I can’t help but hate them when I see them. I hate how competitive this day has become & how crap you can feel by reading how much love is heaped so publicly onto other mums. I have to say that I know I am extremely lucky not to have a real reason to hate this day so I realise how trivial and petty this sounds. Anyone else feel this way or just me?
Am I being unreasonable?
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Howtohideasausage · 19/03/2023 13:10
I find it nauseating too. I don’t think I’m jealous, but bored of seeing it. And not just on SM either.
FlatWhite2 · 19/03/2023 13:14
100% but socially media has taken it to another level. I wonder how many of the husbands posting are just scared of their wives reactions if they don’t
JackiePlace · 19/03/2023 13:15
Facebook twaddle doesn't “show love”. Love is demonstrated by what you do for someone, not what you say about them to an audience.
kessiebird · 19/03/2023 13:21
Used to annoy me when I had a bigger presence on SM and the kids were young. The notion from well wishers that I'd actually get a break never happened due to DHs job, my job and young children. There was also extreme competition in so many ways (who would start a competition over depth of snow for e.g.), I deleted my account rather than unfriend 90% of people. I seem to have mellowed now the DC are older and I have under 40 friends on Facebook - I barely check it these days.
LeilaDarling · 19/03/2023 13:21
I, too, hate Mothers Day, also have my Mum still alive and a good relationship, but the endless gushings on Facebook irritate me so much I stay off it today.
girlfriend44 · 19/03/2023 13:23
Of course other people hate mothers and fathers day. Don't look like it's going away anytime ever though.
hellswelshy · 19/03/2023 13:29
I find it hard, I lost my mum over 20 years ago, now a mum myself to two teen dc. It's generally a mixture of me feeling sad wishing I could see my own mum, entertaining my mil, and in more recent years my dc almost being coerced into showing their love for me with cards and gifts! I think maybe I wish the day just to be very very low key. Maybe I'll do exactly what I want to do next year!
DanceMonster · 19/03/2023 13:30
I hate the social media bollocks too. I’m not jealous, my husband (and kids) are fab and really make me feel special and looked after. It’s just all so performative. And dull. If you think your wife is the best mum in the world, tell her!
MrsDoylesDoily · 19/03/2023 13:30
I cringe at the whole social media fest but that's just the day and age we live in. I just scroll past and roll my eyes.
If it's making you hate Mother's Day, or anything for that matter, it's probably time you came off SM.
DinaofCloud9 · 19/03/2023 13:40
I don't hate Mothers Day but I hate all the moaning on here about it.
Londontoderby · 19/03/2023 13:43
I think public declarations of love are sweet and I do get jealous sometimes as none are ever for me. I like seeing them, each to their own I guess.
SeeYouNextTLol · 19/03/2023 13:46
It is all nonsense and OTT. The husbands are probably forced to by demanding partners and know they have to do this or get a moody partner.
gazpachosoupday · 19/03/2023 13:51
I dont celebrate it, if I could get away with it, I wouldnt celebrate Christmas or Easter either.
But I am a massive grinch about spending money that society thinks I should
Comedycook · 19/03/2023 13:53
I hate it. I also hate valentine's Day. I hate any day where I'm told what to think or do. It's the anarchist in me.
CastlesinSpain · 19/03/2023 13:53
My mother didn’t believe in it, she said the new version of mother’s day with cards etc. came over with the American Troops during WW2 and so we have never celebrated it. I feel much the same about Halloween - Guy Fawkes has a much more anarchic feel to it :) and not nearly such a commercial rip-off.
CrackedHeels2 · 19/03/2023 13:59
Also dislike Mother's Day. My mum died 30 years ago, when I was 18. It would have been her 72nd birthday today as well.
Both my children are adults and have "remembered", this year - I told my husband several weeks ago that I would be upset if they forgot - he has worked hard on reminding them.
I'm glad to see some of the social media posts are more sensitive. Part of me says, it's just another day, part of me feels envious of those people that have had their mothers in their lives for all of their lives.
PotOfTeaForOne · 19/03/2023 14:38
My mum passed away years ago, I feel indifferent about Mother's Day this year. I actually like seeing some of my friends publicly announce their love for their mums, though some posts I'm sure are just for show. They did make jealous in the past, but not really anymore. More thoughtful about what sort of relationship I could have had with my mother.
Hate is a very strong word. Maybe come off social media for a bit if it makes you feel jealous and crap.
Charles11 · 19/03/2023 15:11
I think rituals are good and you make your own rituals to suit Mother's Day. It doesn't have to involve lots of money but these events can have a positive impact on us, and especially on children.
Sadly, many people feel the lack of ritual that they desire and this has a negative impact instead.
JackGrealishsCalves · 19/03/2023 15:22
Not sure i believe anything I see on SM, especially not public showing off.
In that respect I can't get on board with hating a day because other people claim they do it better
jumperoozles · 19/03/2023 15:29
I think it can be nice to show a public appreciation of someone but should not be an expectation. I’ve written happy Mother’s Day to my mum on instagram because I think it’s nice to show her a bit of extra appreciation today but she’d never expect it! At the same time, my husband hasn’t put anything about me on social media but we’ve had a wonderful day out together with my son. If he had I’d be like aw that’s sweet but the fact he hasn’t doesn’t matter one bit to me!
electricmoccasins · 19/03/2023 15:32
Isn’t there a study that shows the happiness of a relationship is inversely proportional to how often it appears on social media?
AceofPentacles · 19/03/2023 15:35
Yes it's crap, my mum is a rubbish mum, DP lost his mum years ago, DS is autistic so doesn't see the point and DSD is a teen so doesn't care either. Makes a lot of people feel sad or disappointed.
notgivinga · 19/03/2023 15:44
I don't hate Mother's Day but I do hate the messages for mothers who have died on fb? I really can't understand it? Who is it actually for?
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