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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"Baby" as a petname for my kids

114 replies

ourflagmeansdeath · 18/03/2023 22:23

I feel as if I'm not being unreasonable but I just wanted to check.

I call all 3 of my children the pet term "baby" - 19 year old son, 14 year old daughter and 5 year old daughter.

I met an old friend recently and when I referred to my 14 year old as this she looked me horrified. And asked if I said this to all my children. I said yes, it's just a habit really and they don't mind/don't notice me doing it at all.

She said I should have stopped for my teens ages ago, and should be considering stopping for the 5 year old as none of them are "babies" and this is a term used with relationships.

I don't agree personally because of course I know they're not babies but they'll always be MY babies. And if her argument is that surely it makes no sense to use this term in a relationship because your partner is not your baby??

Please tell me if I'm wrong though and I've missed something.

OP posts:
Paperexcelandpens · 18/03/2023 22:26

I hate the name baby for anyone - kids or your partner.

Pepsiiscrap · 18/03/2023 22:30

I call my teenage girls baby. As in, 'hello my baby' when they come home from school and stuff.

If they objected I wouldn't. My teen son hated being spoken to like that so I don't.

Oh and obviously I don't do it in front of their friends.

I don't really give a shit what anyone else thinks. I'm not calling them baby so it's not their problem.

SquigglePigs · 18/03/2023 22:30

As long as they don't mind I don't see the problem. I still use it on my 4yr old. No idea if I will when she's older but we'll see.

Yayasisterhood · 18/03/2023 22:31

I use “baby” and activates force shield and “bubba”. Mumsnet believes I should burn in hell for the latter.

mynameiscalypso · 18/03/2023 22:32

Yayasisterhood · 18/03/2023 22:31

I use “baby” and activates force shield and “bubba”. Mumsnet believes I should burn in hell for the latter.

I use babykins which is probably equally terrible in the opinion of MN!

cocksstrideintheevening · 18/03/2023 22:32

They'll always be 'my baby' but I'd never use it in front of anyone else.

IhearyouClemFandango · 18/03/2023 22:32

I call all mine that, 12, 10 and 5.

TrianglePlayer · 18/03/2023 22:33

As above I say “hiya baby” sometimes to my teens when they come in. They don’t mind and I don’t care if anyone thinks I’m weird.

Ponoka7 · 18/03/2023 22:34

Here in Liverpool the youngest in the family is the 'baby'. I think I called my DD that until she was in her teens.

Mermaidparades · 18/03/2023 22:34

I still refer to my 12 year old as my baby (when at home, not in public). I also call my cat my baby! It’s just a sweet term of endearment

steff13 · 18/03/2023 22:34

I call all my kids baby. Two of them are adults!

FunnysInLaJardin · 18/03/2023 22:34

I call my DS's baby, treasure, chicken and my love. They are 13 and 17

AhoyThereShipmates · 18/03/2023 22:34

Mine is my baby. She’s an actual baby though, but I think it’s here to stay.

pbdr · 18/03/2023 22:34

I always struggle to see how people can get themselves so worked up about the most trivial issues. Call them whatever you like, as long as they are not bothered by it then what harm could it possibly do.

Willowtre1 · 18/03/2023 22:35

I often call mine babes. Like come on babes time to go. It just happened and I never really thought much of it!

Mama05070704 · 18/03/2023 22:36

My mum still calls me and my sisters bubs…and I’m approaching 40 😂

Albiboba · 18/03/2023 22:37

I met an old friend recently and when I referred to my 14 year old as this she looked me horrified.

I can’t really work out how you said this or in what context. Sure, they will always be YOUR babies and even as a pet name to them is one thing but are you referring to your 14 year old as ‘a baby/the baby’ to your friend?

As in ‘remember Karen, I have to leave by 3pm to pick the baby up’?

Ponoka7 · 18/03/2023 22:37

Yy to the cat, he's my only baby boy. Before him I had female cats and a male dog, so could quite legitimately call him my only baby boy and them my little girls.

TidyDancer · 18/03/2023 22:37

How was it phrased in front of your friend? I guess it could've come across as a bit cringey depending on what was actually said. I would refer to mine as that as a pet name but I wouldn't do that in conversation with others I don't think because they're not babies.

LolaSmiles · 18/03/2023 22:37

I'd think it was unusual to call an older child baby as a nickname as in "Hiya baby", but it wouldn't seem unusual for someone to call their children of any age "my babies" as in "I miss my babies".

It's not something I'd mention to a friend though because it isn't a big deal.

Luredbyapomegranate · 18/03/2023 22:38

I think it’s fine as a term of endearment like honey or whatever

But I find people who say ‘my babies’ when they mean ‘my kids’ really bizarre.

Luredbyapomegranate · 18/03/2023 22:39

LolaSmiles · 18/03/2023 22:37

I'd think it was unusual to call an older child baby as a nickname as in "Hiya baby", but it wouldn't seem unusual for someone to call their children of any age "my babies" as in "I miss my babies".

It's not something I'd mention to a friend though because it isn't a big deal.

Ha. I just posted to say exactly the opposite. it’s a funny world..

Apollonia1 · 18/03/2023 22:40

My twins are 3, and I call them baby. Eg if they ask me for something, I say "yes, my baby". I also call them "baby angel".

pointythings · 18/03/2023 22:40

As long as they're OK with it, it's no one's business but yours.

I don't call any of mine baby because their late dad called them that and he was not a good person, but I use other names - mostly 'chops' and 'fiend'.

iwontforgetyoumyfriendwhathappened · 18/03/2023 22:41

Yayasisterhood · 18/03/2023 22:31

I use “baby” and activates force shield and “bubba”. Mumsnet believes I should burn in hell for the latter.

😄 I use baby and bubba too! My kids are fine with it.
Mumsnetters will want me lynched cos I use the term "hubby" daily too. Tsk tsk tsk!