To buy a £700k house on £67k

No.

Also - you don’t know if the school is even that good unless you’ve visited, reviewed reports, got views from current parents… we’re in the catchment for a good school - appears to get good results. It’s done via private tutoring and there’s no way my kids are going there.

it would be possible to live on £1900, but there’s an art to it which you’d have to learn. Since you’re paying insurance, taxes, electric, gas, water and more out of that - how does the family feel about having zero extra curriculars? Planning meals based on the Aldi super 6? Going veggie? Walking/biking everywhere to avoid petrol costs? Only buying clothes when the old ones have too many holes you can’t fix? Not going on trips? Relying on club card points for a day out? Always taking a packed lunch?

and how will you pay family back? And do you understand what borrowing from family does to your relationship with them?

To be fair, @amiold, £1,900 pcm to live on after housing seems loads to me, but only because I’m a cheapskate!

I was very foolish with my money during my younger days

I’m afraid not much has changed if you are contemplating this. So your marriage is already strained. What happens when you are broke with a house you can’t afford? What happens when your wife gets moody because you can’t afford holidays and nice cars?

It won’t be fun on £1900 a month, what happens if something breaks and you have to replace it

In the nicest possible way, your wife needs to grow up. You would be beholden to that mortgage and paying back family could lead to increased tensions.

On your calculations, your outgoings of 1600 will likely rise if you have a bigger house. Council tax, utilities, maintenance etc. Then there's stamp duty and moving costs which would be over 20k.

You will have very little scope for emergency savings, holidays, home improvements. What if the car dies, or the boiler?

The only way I would consider it is if I had a guarantee that income would rise significantly in the next few years.

If you borrow money from family, they count as having an interest in the property and a mortgage lender won't offer you money. You have to prove all your income and savings etc and show your bank accounts so you can't hide it.

Would your wife be just as upset if she knows it isn't you, but the bank, making the decision? Is she upset because she thinks you're being unreasonable, or because she really wants the bigger house? As someone else said, is there the possibility of buying something with potential rather than having it all right now?

You need to cut your cloth to suit your purse op, you can't afford this but you probably know that really. It does seem like less of a house problem and more of a dw problem though?

The family loan would be an issue. Your solicitor would need to prove where it had come from, and you’d need either (as pp said) signed declaration that it was a gift, or mortgage company would need to account for you repaying it and so would lend less.

This. You can’t afford it at all OP.

I would have several concerns. How secure are your jobs? Do you have the ability to increase your earnings if needed (eg is one of you currently part time or able to do overtime).
Whilst on paper it might be doable, and I personally have stretched to get the biggest mortgage I can in the past, I think even for me this ratio on those salaries with the lack of stability in the economy would make me baulk especially as any change in interest rate/circumstances could really impact you.

Thats just mad, you have an amazing deposit for a reasonable house. Whats the point of having an expensive house if you would struggle to do anything else. A run of unexpected bills could leave you really vulnerable.

I definitely wouldn't do it. We have a similar joint income and originally borrowed 210. I wouldn't want to borrow anymore. Not looking forward to the end our cheap fix deal. Enjoy life rather than worrying about how you will pay a gigantic mortgage. I would assume a 700k property is potentially decently large so higher heating costs and council tax too!

Yeah but you gwo cant afford it can you?

Mortgaged up to the hilt in uncertain times isnt fun and good schools may not be good schools in 5-10 years.

Sorry but it's a stupid idea and if your partner is stropping around their have major doubts about moving forward and financially tying myself (further) with someone that wants to push me outside of my comfort zone.

Talk to a financial advisor and see what they tell you both.

Does OP's wife sound like the sort of person who will go without and scrimp and save to manage on that? I dont think so!!

Bonkers

DH and I have joint income of around £160k and I wouldn’t look at £700k houses!

“it would be possible to live on £1900, but there’s an art to it which you’d have to learn. Since you’re paying insurance, taxes, electric, gas, water and more out of that - how does the family feel about having zero extra curriculars? Planning meals based on the Aldi super 6? Going veggie? Walking/biking everywhere to avoid petrol costs? Only buying clothes when the old ones have too many holes you can’t fix? Not going on trips? Relying on club card points for a day out? Always taking a packed lunch?”

These are really good points. I’m frugal so manage to have extra curriculars for my DD this with less than £1,900 after mortgage costs, but I have no extras for me, don’t go on holiday, and live as described by the poster above. It can be tough.

Good point!!

Sorry OP but all I can think is FFS!

severe reality check needed here.

If your wife truly loves you then her happiness and your marriage shouldn’t depend on fulfilling this wish.

I actually doubt it would be able to be financially viable from a lending perspective either.

I ask my kids what the most important thing about a house is - “the people in it”

This is not necessarily true. All the lender is bothered about is that they will recoup their money. The OP will have considerable equity so unlikely the lender will be overly concerned about the other loan as long as the lender is paid back first.

You earn combined less than me and dh do and the mortgage you want would be significantly more than we pay. Plus you'll have a significant amount to pay back to relatives you borrow from. Based on experience, you cannot afford this. children get more expensive the older they get. My children's school bus passes are £1400ish in September. They also want holidays.

No, this is bonkers, I earn more than you, my mortgage has just gone up to 31% of net pay and I really think it is too much of my income to spend even though I've got 50% of my net income left after all my regular outgoings.

Don't do it, you can't afford it. You'd be mad to go from a very nice solvent position with a fantastic deposit to financial insecurity and the worry of having to service a massive debt.

Makes me wonder what your wife’s upbringing was to have this type of expectation as well, and why should all the onus be on you?! “I wasn’t careful with money when I was younger” marriage is a partnership and it sounds to me like you’re dealing with a spoilt brat here

Im surprised how little is being said about OPs wife here. If this was the other way round and a husband was being moody, stroppy etc because the poster didnt want to overstretch on borrowing, it would be LTB all round