To think this may be psychosis?

[doritstew]

My daughters dad started acting strangely the past few days. We are not together but the past few nights we have spent time together. He has turned up at my house the past few nights and has been...odd to say the least.

He seems kind of manic…not making much sense to me…speaking in very strange ways. He keeps speaking about ‘his shadow’ and power and trauma and things like that.

Speaking really fast, jumping from topic to topic, struggling to really grasp what he means and keep up. He says he feels great and isn’t taking drugs etc. He keeps speaking about protecting me and our daughter and that we are a family and how he is willing to give up his power and give it to me and daughter. He says that he's glad I I've realised to, but doesn't tell me or can't explain what I've realised. He says we need to teach our daughter before she starts academy, but doesn't tell me what we've to teach her. Very vague but yet very deep - doesn't really make sense.

He said his friend sent him a song that he believes is a personal attack on him. Listened to the song and there was nothing attacking about it at all.

He said someone at jizitsu called him a ‘cock’ under his breath whilst they were having a conversation. I said I’m sure he didn’t call you that but he was positive the guy did. He said that if you really listen you can hear what people are thinking.

I'm really quite worried but he swears he is the happiest he's ever been and he is all huggy and smily. But it's really been strange listening to him.

No hallucinations he says. AIBU?

He said that if you really listen you can hear what people are thinking.
He says he feels great and isn’t taking drugs etc.

Pychosis can feel amazing ... before it becomes terrifying.
If he won;t go to A&E with you, ring 999 & get him a welfare check.

Don't let him back into your house OP.

Not until he's been seen by MH professionals & has been medicated for at least several days.

i can’t see anything written by OP that would suggest that.

sadly, the bar is set very high, they do not have the funding to section everyone in this state.

There is a LOT of misinformation in this thread

@Irritateandunreasonable

I know right? Because the NHS can section everyone who is experiencing an episode of psychosis? Laughable really, particularly with the explosion of drug use in society. The wards are full of young men, a lot of them are black too, but that’s another thread entirely.

All the OP can do is keep herself safe if there is a risk to herself. Perhaps ring the crisis team but even then at this stage it’s unlikely they would just come out with no known prior history within the services. Even presenting at A&E is often useless. My friend was given a few leaflets and sent on her merry way. MH services are a mess, underfunded and in no way have the capacity to help every person.

Worth trying to get him seen via some avenue though via early intervention, but I guess if he has no insight it may be more difficult.

Nobody has suggested locking him out of his house. They have suggested OP locks him out of her house. He has his own house to go to.

Exactly, and I don't think it's 'prejudice' for op to want to keep her child and self safe, especially if as above Kept saying that he is a monster and is capable of terrible things but he has accepted that and is trying to be kind?
That's back on the #bekind wagon isn't it?
Yes someone experiencing psychosis or mentally unwell may absolutely be lovely and usually have no intent to cause harm. It's not worth the risk of op providing access at present until he's been seen by someone.

OP, YANBU.

I lack the MN ability to unerringly diagnose remotely but I strongly recommend you minimise contact with your ex-partner until this issue is sorted. Please do not allow him into the house or to have any physical contact wth your daughter until it is safe to do so.

If it was legalised and licensed, it could be regulated and the strength controlled, reducing the risk.

My (boomer) generation started smoking dope in the 60s/early 70s. I never heard of a single person getting a cannabis-induced psychosis back then, and my first recollection of hearing of it was much later, approx early-mid 90s, when hydroponically grown weed from very strong strains started to be the most common sort of cannabis available.

It now seems to be practically all you can get. I had to give it up, that stuff wipes me out and I don't find it all enjoyable.

Sorry I’ve not read the thread, I wanted to jump straight in with what I’ve seen from OP’s posts.

It is no use explaining to him that he is psychotic. If he went ‘yes, I feel really odd, you might be right’, then that would mean he is not psychotic, as he has a level of insight into his behaviour being off.

Please try to get him help. Call his GP, say you understand they can’t discuss his health with you, but you are genuinely extremely worried and need their advice. This will not be the first time they’ve heard this, they should be able to advise. Ugh, it’s the weekend, so GP likely shut. Can you call 111?

Ultimately, the police may need to get involved, as the behaviour will not go away. I’m so sorry.

A friend of my ex's believed he could scientifically prove that god didn't exist when he had a psychotic episode. He could therefore prove that the queen had no right to rule, as that is a divine right, and no god = no such thing as divine right.

This had somehow come to the attention of "the authorities", who had bugged his house and were seeking to destroy him with tiny drones that would arrive in his house via the drains. So that he could see the drones coming, he removed all the toilet and bathroom doors in his house!

It was astonishing, and accelerated really quickly.

Oh, and obviously, do not let him see your daughter. Don’t antagonise him by saying why, just say she’s unwell or something. Anything. Keep her safe.

I didn't say lock him out of his own house, no one has said that.

OP, there is a lot of misinformation and very stigmatising language being used on this thread. I don’t think it’s particularly helpful to you either.

I have worked with people experiencing psychosis for years as a healthcare professional. The vast majority of people I have worked with I would say are extremely frightened and persecuted by their experiences. I’ve worked on mental health wards 1-1 with people experiencing psychosis and never have experienced any violence from them. Mostly people are extremely frightened and vulnerable.

It is not necessarily a good thing to challenge people on their beliefs/experiences whilst they are unwell as it can cause frustration and further confusion. It is best to get the person help from early intervention services. A&E isn’t necessarily the best place to take a person who’s clearly very unwell - can you get an appointment at gp out of hours?

To keep you in for 28 days they need to put you on a section 2. It is illegal to be released on section 2 without a community care plan.

I have known people to bounce in and out of a 3 day emergency hold but never a section 2.

They were excellent with me after, had psychologist, psychiatrist, cbd, mental health nurse that visited my home all once a week. They pumped an incredible amount of resource into me and it worked.

They also pumped a lot of unasked for resource into me when I was pregnant as preventative which also worked.

I can’t fault it really. I do think they take psychosis very seriously. I was never a risk to myself or others but they managed to find a way round it once I had been handed over by the police.

Idk what your custody/access arrangements are and I have no personal experience with the legality of it, but if I think you ought to immediately report this to crisis team/police and get some sort of action going immediately for your child's sake.

Get hold of kiddo's school and anyone who provides care and tell them not let him have her.

You can't let him have access to your child until you know wtf is going on AND he has been stabilised.

Not all people having a break from reality become violent, but in this state he's not going to be able to assess risk to your child or even himself from outside sources. Some people become so trusting when they are ill, that they will allow someone they've just met to come and live with them for days when most adult's common sense would not allow it.

Is there any chance you could persuade your ex to have some basic health checks (temp, BP) and stop the cannabis? This might help thinking through causes and get him help for immediate threatening physical health issues (if there are any). Also I wanted to send hugs for you OP. This appears to be someone you care about and is important to your child and watching him suffer like this must be very difficult for you. Good luck to all of you.

All you can do is support him and speak with professionals about how you go forward with your daughter having contact in a safe way

Unfortunately things are still the same today. He text me at 3 am this morning then 4 am. He just phoned me and said he had been playing golf with his brother then going to play squash with a friend so I'm glad he's seeing people so others can see. He said he woke up at 3 am for the day, I suggested he should have a nap but he said he will 'push through tiredness and not let his emotions rule him'.

Sadly no response from his brother which is disappointing so have contacted his mum who is a retired CPN. Hopefully she'll do something but the family are very good at burying their heads in the sand and pretending certain things aren't going on.

Update from his brother -

hey, sorry my phone was on silent last night…yeh he’s going through it big time, hes been sitting thinking about his childhood and his traumas whilst on ket which is making everything so much bigger and completely getting lost in it. He’s also focusing on his faults and how he’s hurt people and been hurt by people over the years and it’s getting too much for him i think. He’s saying he’s totally fine but as you’ve seen it doesn’t look like it. He’s venting a-lot to me aswell and i’m just hoping it runs it’s course. Hes also stopped the ket so he’s obviously having withdrawals and doing intermittent fasting which will be adding to the elation and manic thoughts. I think he really is trying to change his life for the better but he’s struggling with it. He’s coming round to ours for dinner tomorrow so we will try and speak to him and see if we can put some sort of plan in place. I’m just hoping he realizes soon he’s not fine. Has daughter voiced anything?

He is in a mental health crisis. This is not something that is going to run its course and once in a crisis, he needs others to seek help for him. Someone needs to call and speak to 111 and say he is in a crisis or take him to A&E. This will likely keep getting worse until he is seen and medicated now. I'm sorry you are all going through this, the sooner someone takes him to get help the better.

He will tell you he doesn't need help. That is part of his illness. Don't expect him to take himself to the GP in this state, it's not how the illness works.

Update from mum -

Hi OP, I know that brother got back to you - my phone was updating so sorry for the delay. He FaceTimed me as he said you sent me a message with your concerns. He did come over a bit elated with lots of talk but denied when I suggested that, yes he is saying he feels well. He is trying to turn himself round but also been exploring theories about personality traits and behaviours ( that is the shadow example that he is referring to ) you know what he is like re impressionable and then buys into whatever 110 % and has become over focused. He is coming round tomorrow, just hoping and praying that things will settle. Will keep in touch xx

He text me at 3 am this morning then 4 am

Is he not sleeping? 36hrs awake and I see the shadow people. If he's having a manic or psychotic episode it can be a vicious cycle. Don't listen to the advice about treating him like an unexploded bomb which will only reinforce his conspiracy theories.

Taking it back to basics follow the NHS guide Where to get urgent help for mental health which explains what you should do in this situation. There is a dedicated phone service for those concerned about loved ones. Otherwise 111 and explain a relative is having a mental health crisis. Unfortunately if he is seen not to be a danger to himself or others and/or is able to mask the symptoms they will probably refer back to his GP as an emergency appointment or redirect to an A&E with hours-long waits.

We should all be outraged about the gutting of mental health services. The resources which were there for me many times (voluntary admissions, counselling, support workers) hardly exist now. Crisis teams are overwhelmed.

It's worrying that neither actually seem concerned about what it not "running its course" and it not "settling down" might look like.

They are both with their heads in the sand and 100% denial - and minimising - the personality spin is not proportional to the ‘monster’ stuff.

This must be very frustrating for you.

Do they know all of the highly irrational stuff? I would write his words out them in black and white and then tell them you see this as a psychotic episode which puts him (potentially others) at high risk.

Are you asking their permission to refer him?

The Ket thing alarms me as this along with cannabis use is the exact combination that spiralled my relatives MH which ended in tragedy.

Know that his family have got it wrong - in our family we also crossed our fingers and wrung our hands.