Not much diversity at son's school putting me off

[agagahag]

AIBU ? My local area is quite diverse. However the preschool my son attends is not diverse at all.

It's part of a prep school. I feel a bit put off by it.

Would it put you off ? Ideally the school should reflect the local culture, but in this case it does not at all.

Then don’t enrol your child in a private prep primary school. Your arms aren’t tied in this scenario.
Or do you only want diversity of ethnicity but not socioeconomically?

Then you would have more chance of that in a state school ,unless you live in a very non diverse area .

Private schools are never diverse. At most they may be ethnically diverse but not economically, socially or in terms of SEN.

But if the education aspects are the main importance then why would other candidates make any difference ?

I just wondered whether it's unreasonable to want your child to be in a school where there are kids from different places, rather than 80-90 percent of kids from just one background. Is that a normal thing to feel ? I don't want them to be the odd one out.

This is a perfectly reasonable worry and with it comes some difficult choices.

My sons prep school is very ethnically diverse. I have no idea about the sen ratio (although my eldest has sen needs). I would have to agree about the economically diverse bit but both my sons attend out of school clubs as I don't want them surrounded by the same, privileged kids the whole of their lives.

I can understand your perspectives, but even in a mixed diverse school, is still no certainy that they will fit in

What is that one group - Indians, Chinese, white, too posh, not posh, too many foreign students etc. etc.? Hard to judge if YABU unless you care to elaborate.

You keep saying "background". What do you mean?

A lack of diversity is a huge red flag that needs to be alerted with the relevant authorities. Is there someone in your local council you can have a word with to bring it to their attention?

I mean ethnic background.

I think you realise and probably will need to opt for state education then.

It's a shame it's this way as it shows true equality in communities isn't there yet but I understand what you mean about wanting your ds's educational experience to reflect community experience.

It's really a decision on what you're willing to compromise on. If the state education isn't as good academically wise (many are) then are you willing to compromise on that for a more rounded cultural experience?

I was never in the place to decide between state and private but sadly as well we aren't really a diverse area either although we are becoming more so.

Which ethnic background do you have a problem with?

If it was actually on merit it would be diverse. The fact it isn't shows that other factors are coming into play.

Well.obviously not but again your child has more chance ( depending on where you live of course ) of mixing with children from different ethnicities in a state school.,obviously there will be certain areas that are predominantly white British for example but it depends on the local community.

There is more diversity in my kid's independent school than the local state infant. They have attended both and there are two children of colour in his year in his independent school and I think there were two in his whole state school. There are three in my daughter's class. Etc etc

I'm guessing that OP is white and the majority ethnic group is Asian.

Agree with others that if she wants a school that reflects the makeup of her local community, she needs to go with her local community school.

However, you do realise that it's very common for people from non-white backgrounds to have this situation?

There is also a mix of backgrounds and nationalities

We live in a very diverse area and DD does to the local nursery (privately run but not attached to a private school iyswim). It's weirdly non diverse. I have no idea why 🤷🏼‍♀️

If you wanted a school whose pupil mix reflects the local population, you would send your child to the local state primary school.

The main purpose of private school is to ensure that your child only goes to school with the "right" children. Not the poor ones, not the ones who don't speak English, not the ones who struggle academically or have unemployed parents. Specifically not very diverse, is what you are choosing and paying for.

Although, because you're being somewhat coy with the specifics, if your kid is Black and the prep school is mainly white British then you can't shield them from the fact that they're in the minority and the hurdles that come with that forever but you can do a lot in way of building self-esteem and having open discussions. You can always see how your kid gets on and if it's not working remove him - you could that for reasons of much less significance than his ethnicity.

@redskylight Probably why the OP is skirting around the specifics.

Our local prep is more ethnically diverse than our local state school by far. Our state school is practically all white. We moved to our local prep and albeit not financially diverse - children of all ethnicities and I’d say 2/3 are ‘of colour’ and about 1/3 white.