Teams calls in cafe and toddler

[Swiftswatch]

I’m probably being unreasonable for posting here in the first place since there’s a bit of an anti kids in public sentiment here at times, but when did it become acceptable for people to think a coffee shop is the same as an office??
I was just having breakfast and a coffee with my toddler and someone was taking a teams call at a nearby table. If it’s relevant we were seated first.
Toddler was being good as gold imo, I get sometimes they can be too loud or badly behaved but they were just sat drinking their juice and having a little babble and sing, occasionally pointing out things they seen. “Cup! Cup!” Obviously louder than if I was just sat by myself but really not a disturbance and no louder than any other table of 2 chatting.

The man was sat sighing and rolling his eyes for about ten minutes until I just had to turn to him and say ‘sorry but this is actually a cafe not an office, if you’re in a meeting and need silence you’re in the wrong place’.
He did a big huff, picked up his laptop and walked off trying to find a new table but had to come back as it was too busy.

Now he’s sitting there giving me evil eyes.

AIBU to think I’m not in the wrong here?? I’m really not a confrontational person and normal wouldn’t speak up but a public cafe at breakfast time isn’t exactly the place to do a work meeting!
If people want to rave about working from home then go fucking work at home. People out in public don’t need to tiptoe around you because you want a change of scenery during the work day while you sit in meetings.

What, so we should all sit there like passive little women and not saying anything when someone is clearly rolling their eyes at us and being annoyed with our child? That's doormat behaviour. And OP wasn't rude, she just pointed out it was not the best environment for his meeting.

Good for you, he was being a total arse

Of course you and toddler had a right to be there and be making a normal amount of noise. If he wanted silence then he should have been at home/ at a library etc.

But equally, it's perfectly fine for people to sit and work on laptops in cafes if they want to. (As long as they don't expect people to change their normal cafe behaviour to accommodate it!)

She wasn’t rude. He was.

I don’t see the issue with sitting in a coffee show working in a laptop, I don’t see it being any different to sitting reading a book for example. But teams calls and interviews are ridiculous!!

I hate kids in restaurants, but I agree with this totally. He was a dick. Hope you enjoyed your coffee with your toddler 🙂

Well done for saying something! I WFH and sometimes go to a cafe for a change of scene but not when I need silence and definitely not when I have a Teams / Zoom meeting. What a dick.

Good for you. Something I often think but am not brave enough to say.

I'm not a parent, I'm easily irritated by noisy children in inappropriate places, and I think a) YA definitely NBU and b) he IBU and a selfish twat.

I've sat in my car in the past for Teams calls when I couldn't get home or to the office for some reason, or freezing in a quiet place in a park (when it wasn't raining).

Apart from me being able to hear better that way, many of my teams calls are either personal, or dealing with work related matters that are definitely NOT for public consumption e.g. talking about vulnerable young people, or in a previous career clients personal finances. Plus it's much more polite to the others on the call to see you've made an effort to be in an appropriate place rather than fitting them in where it suits you.

As someone who regularly works in coffee shops... nothing annoys me more than people who sit there on Teams calls while working. It's so rude. Extra rudeness points if they don't use headphones. It's always somehow 10x louder than any group of people sitting around laughing and chatting. The whole reason I work in coffee shops is so that I can enjoy being around other people etc. Sometimes, I might put some headphones in to concentrate for a bit but it's the low level of background noise I'm there for in the first place.

Well done for saying something.

I dont agree that as he didn't say something you weren't entitled to. He was deliberately trying to make you feel uncomfortable. I remember my mum and I taking my then toddler for lunch in a bistro. She was being really good, but making typical toddler noises. A group of loud "ladies that lunch" types were huffing and glaring each time she made a noise. My wonderful dm called them out on it and pointed out they were making more noise than she was.

Agreed.

Although I was once quietly working on a report in a cafe and my manager called me on Teams unexpectedly (she hardly ever does this).

I felt really awkward that the people around me had to listen to me doing a work call, even though it was only about 10 minutes!

He’s entitled to work in a cafe (though people are not entitled to work in cafes for hours hogging tables). He doesn’t have a right to a quiet environment because it’s a public place. It’s bonkers to do Teams calls in cafes because it’s unlikely to be quiet and it isn’t private.
I am allowed to WFH some of the time but not in public places using public Wi-Fi. He might be self employed and able to work where he wants, but even so it isn’t his office and he has to expect noise and distractions.

If someone is ostentatiously demonstrating to the whole cafe that they are irritated with you, they’re being unbelievably rude. Especially when you’re not doing anything wrong and they’re being unreasonable.

More people should challenge this shite. People who roll their eyes and sigh at perfectly normal cafe behaviours should be told they’re being arseholes. Maybe then they’ll stop doing it.

Although, if you want to entertain yourself, play "misogynist bingo" when you are surrounded by wankers men on Teams Calls... without even looking, you can almost always tell if they're talking to a man or a woman. Sometimes, you can even figure out if they're talking to a woman they think is hot or one they think is stupid (I have NEVER spotted the "you're an idiot" tone in the voice of a man talking to another man on Teams).

To check if you're right, you need to casually get into position to see their screens.

I have a 100% success rate in this game.

We once sat in a crowded museum cafe almost knee to knee with a person having an appraisal with a manager. Inevitably we heard every word. I mentioned this once before on here and was told I was being unreasonable for thinking this was not an appropriate place for a confidential employment-related meeting. That was pre-pandemic. I would hope these things would now be done on Teams if there isn't a private meeting room available in the workplace, but not in a public place! Well done to OP. You were not rude in the slightest.

No, we should carry on unashamedly with our reasonable behaviour.

People are completely entitled to be annoyed and even to clearly roll their eyes at me for as long as they fucking like and I'm only a doormat if I indulge their pass. agg. nonsense by changing what I'm doing.

If a man tried to tell me my coffee shop Teams meeting was in the wrong place, I would consider that mansplaining of the highest order.

So why didn't you a) leave or b) tell your manager you'd call her back?

Sorry, just because she called you, doesn't mean you had to take the call.

This. Good for you on speaking up OP.

It's unbelievable the things one hears on these calls when people take them in cafes and on the train. It's like there is no concept of confidentiality or GDPR.

I walk past Costa almost daily & it’s the same people sitting there on their laptops. Unless they spend a lot I’ve never understood why staff tolerate them. Next time you go in film him, it seems to be the thing to do these days. You did well to confront the cunt over this OP.

The OP has said nothing about him "ostentationously demonstrating to the whole cafe." Rolling your eyes and sighing are actions that can very easily be ignored.

Nonsense. It doesn't matter which sex the complainer is. Holding a meeting in a cafe is inappropriate. Eyerolling when other cafe users refuse to sit in silence is rude.

Yanbu

and I wish all the WFH (🤔) men who are walking their dogs down our peaceful semi rural lane would stop bloody shouting their work calls as they walk along.

no, you are not important Mr Manager, you are skiving.

Fair play to you OP.