To refuse to stay at work late?

[Onlyyours]

I’m a teacher. Due to strikes a parents evening has been rearranged, but I had plans for that evening.

Am I within my rights to refuse to do it, given the circumstances?

How is the train driver a better example? Parents evening has to happen, and happen within a reasonable timeframe.

Nobody missing their train journey yesterday feels the need to make two journeys today to make up for it?

Why does parents evening have to happen?

Had the school gone ahead with the original date, then parents evening would have happened but with many members of staff unavailable.

But a gabbled three minute chat with a handful of parents is really not the same as an operation!

Why do you think parents evening doesn't have to happen?

@ReadersD1gest - there is a saying along the lines that nothing should come as a surprise at parents evening. In other words, if there are problems, the parents will know about it beforehand.

Contact with parents is important, but this doesn’t have to be done at a parents evening. But we are straying away here. I do parents evenings, but the world won’t end if I miss one. Comparing it to a missed operation - even for a relatively minor op - really isn’t the same.

Surely if you want parents to support the school and engage with their children's learning, it's helpful occasionally to engage with them and keep them up-to-date. Respect is a two-way process.

It isn’t disrespectful to go to a concert on the night of a parents evening when the parents evening was changed!

Surely the onus should be on the parents themselves to engage with the school about their child's learning? I mean, to be honest, at the end of this academic year I will never teach my current class again. It's not going to adversely affect my life one jot whether Bob's parents turned up to speak to me or not. However, Bob's parents, and of course Bob himself, are going to be dealing with his attitude for many years to come.

No it's not - I agree with you there. If a teacher can't make it (which you can't), then that's just one of those things.

But that doesn't mean parents evening is pointless... it's important to create engagement between parents and the school so they're on the same page. Especially at secondary level, it's often the only chance to meet the people teaching your child. For instance, it's much easier for parents to understand that you're a sensible and caring human being trying your best to get their child to learn if they meet you in person rather than listening to whatever nonsense their child might be feeding them!

Isn't turning up at parents evening one of the key ways for parents to engage 😄?

I mean, unless your child is having obvious problems or you have an issue with the school, you're probably not going to demand a meeting with the headmaster and teachers to have a cosy chat about how they're doing. Parents evening, cursory as it is, is one of the few opportunities to check in on how they're doing.

@Sleepless1096 i don’t think it’s pointless, but equally, if a teacher can’t make one because of illness or in this case prior engagement I don’t think it’s the end of the world either.

This is bonkers. Having had 3 DCs go through school (and out the other side) I think at least one teacher was unavailable for every single parents evening I ever attended, sometimes more. I didn't think twice about it, I just assumed they had a prior engagement – which you do @Onlyyours. Honestly, parents won't mind as long as they are given an alternative opportunity to speak to you if they want to.

It sounds like you have a rather dictatorial HT, so my approach would be to be quite unequivocal and not allow any room for further debate. Just say 'I'm sorry but I'm not free on that rearranged date as I have a commitment elsewhere. I am happy to make myself available on xx date instead.'

No, I don't either. And I don't think you should have to miss your event.

But equally I don't think the head is unreasonable to reschedule because parents' evening is an unimportant extra, which is what some posters seem to have suggested. If schools want parental engagement, they need to give parents opportunities to engage. And there aren't all that many at secondary level as, understandably, schools don't have time to be constantly feeding back to parents.

I haven’t read all the thread, so not sure if it’s primary or secondary but I have had several parents evenings at secondary school where a teacher wasn’t available. I was a little annoyed BUT we were invited to email the teacher and that teacher sent an email back with a written report, which I felt was more helpful than a 5 minute face to face with the teacher.

Right, so we are agreed that the teacher's job is very important. Therefore it's not going to be eliminated so it's a moot point.

Not at all - that's very strange logic. Just because a teacher's job is very important doesn't mean that individual teachers set the curriculum or plan the running of the school and the budget.

Just suppose the next important thing to be jettisoned were marking, exams or PSHE, with teachers declaring them not deliverable, so tough: they don't really matter anyway. Don't you think that schools would then start looking whether they need as many teachers, if the workload is less, and/or questioning whether the existing pay grades are still justified, if the tasks and responsibility are reduced - especially if they now find themselves having to find alternative providers to make up the difference.

I'm not saying they would be necessarily right to do so; but that kind of action by professionals/employees can turn into a bit like turkeys voting for Christmas.

Not just speak to HT to change your night?

Our school are still doing online parents evenings, which we prefer. When the notification goes out to ask parents to book their appointments, there are always around 4 or 5 teachers who aren't going to be available on that day, so parents are asked to contact them directly if they have any particular queries.

I can't help with the "official rules", but personally feel that your specific circumstances for this occasion do warrant understanding from your SLT and I really hope they are.

Op, ask nicely first and then if the HT comes back with a demand for you to attend the parents evening, then you can say something like:

‘Thank you for your fast response, however, just to reiterate, I am unable to attend the rearranged parents evening on that particular date.

As I explained, I have already made plans for that evening that unfortunately cannot be rearranged.

I made these plans in good faith, back in November, after checking the original school calendar for 2022-2023.

I have since also checked with my union, who have informed me that I am not obligated to attend the new date, as no consultation of this date change has occurred and the original calendar was set to protect my work life balance and allow me to make such appointments.

I want to reiterate however, that I do intend to mitigate any inconvenience this will cause, by ensuring I contact all parents in the lead up to the parents evening, and I will endeavour to feedback to my line manager in a timely manner. Alternatively, I am happy to make myself available to meet parents on the following dates:…’

Just be polite, straightforward and leave no room for misinterpretation that you are asking for permission. Equally, give your regional rep a ring, to get advice in writing via email.

HR Lady? Did you just assume their gender??? 🤣🤣🤣

Your head teacher sounds like he/she is a bully?!?
I honestly wouldn’t be asking permission for the evening off… I would be sending an email simply saying
That you have prior arrangements which are paid for and we’re scheduled after receiving your yearly plan, and due to the short notice given for the reschedule you can not change amend or be refunded for this prior engagement so you will not be attending parents evening. Make it very clear this isn’t negotiable. You simply will not be there…. You’re not asking permission but telling them you will not be there. State you are however happy to call anyone who desperately wants to chat with you on XY or Z after school.
He can insist as much as he likes, you just need to say ‘I’m very sorry but it isn’t my fault the evening was changed, I didn’t even strike!!’
Email as much as possible so you have a paper trail and if you’re called in the office state that you will be recording the meeting encase you need legal advice over it…. I bet he won’t say no on record!

State in email that your husband has booked annual leave, transport, etc… and you’re sorry but the evening is not negotiable as was booked in November with great consideration for work commitments. These changes sadly aren’t convenient and you will not be able to attend.

The union must have a position on this surely?

We've had a similar change. Was supposed to be a parents evening on the first strike day. This has been rearranged. Before the date of the rearranged one was announced I asked my union rep what would happen if I had tickets booked for the rearranged date. I have a few gigs coming up later on this school year, all of which were booked after the school calendar was produced, so was worried I would have a similar situation to what you have described. Union rep said I would have backing of union to not attend. It might be worth a call to your union (if you are in one?) to ask the official position on this, I've called them before with a question and they have been helpful.

I understand why you would want to know where you stand in this legally before speaking to the headteacher. I would feel the same before approaching my headteacher.

ds was generally a "low maintenance" (for want of a better expression) pupil at school. There was nothing exceptional that I would have went through the rigmarole needed to contact a teacher, or want to "bother" the teacher with a chat between parents evenings.

His once a year parents evening was invaluable to me to ask questions and receive advice beyond his report, especially in secondary in the exams years and the years before.

It might not seem a big deal to you as the pupils move on and you are not interested in doing it at all, but it really is to many parents as it the only way they get to engage with the school to get insights into their child's education and how to support them throughout secondary.

I absolutely think your prior personal arrangements should be kept. But also think something should be done to plug the gap (offer a night of phone calls on a date suitable to you instead).

If the school is rearranging work not done because of a strike, surely they could rearrange all the missed lessons on an evening too, totally defeating the object of a strike. Workers should not “make up” work hours lost to striking. The parents’ evening really should not go ahead and if op booked an evening in accordance with the calendar, then they should go to it.

Another question - did the Head ask for preferences of rearranged date /ask if you had any prior commitments before rearranging?

If my contract stated I was expected to do evening or weekend work x number of times a year and those dates would be set in September, I would expect to be consulted as to my availability before it was rearranged, particularly given there was no requirement for it to be this specific date.