To think a place can cause depression?

[Kittycattenklump]

I am wondering whether I might need a change of scene.

Appreciate that I am ‘lucky’ to live in a lovely place, I live and work in Windermere, Lake District, and have done for the past 6 years. I am 2 yrs single and happy with that, have some nice friends and am happily self employed, but recently I am coming to feel that the place itself makes me feel this weird depression, like a hopelessness, that I don’t feel when I visit other places or stay with my longer distance friends.

I left for a year during the pandemic, and it doesn’t feel the same since coming back. Even the people coming here seem different somehow. But I can’t explain. There was previously a kind of nature lover/alternative vibe which is now missing.
I rent and the prices seem to have flown up in the past year -although that’s an issue everywhere, there’s a sadness to it here as what’s left of the market is dated or drab for a very high price. Local friends are depressed with the housing situation as many are sold off to airB&B.

I am comfortable financially but the manic switch of quiet grey gloom then heavy tourism has begun to put me on edge, something hard to explain.
Perhaps the balance has shifted and it’s no longer the right place for me, no matter the grandeur of the landscape. It feels like a giant commodity, bland and soulless recently.

other areas of my life are great, so i do suspect I might be up for a move. Would you consider it? Would you live here? Would love some thoughts on this as I haven’t discussed it with anyone yet.

I think you’re a few miles from me in the Abbey town 😉

I’ve never liked Dorset. Lived her nearby 20 years. It was supposed to be a stop gap. We’re planning to go back to our much missed Devon, mostly due to family but also as it’s changed so much here and become very polar. You’re either rich and extremely entitled or poor and angry. Not many of us in the middle. But I think that reflects the country as a whole. The gap is getting bigger.

We're not in the Abbey Town, although I'm not keen on that either. Maybe think about what is used to build Abbeys.

Sherborne? I lived there once and didn’t like it at all.

I think a lot of places have changed post-pandemic. That heavy British tourism of 2020 seems to have shifted something permanently - most likely that the number of people moving out from the cities and also landlords investing in buy-to-lets and second homes have shot up. Brexit, too, with more people looking for second homes in the UK rather than abroad. It's destroyed local communities and turned touristy destinations into seasonal theme parks now. I'm from Devon and couldn't go back. It's all full of 'grockles' (as we used to call them) now. Where to go to escape the madding crowds and find a lovely local community without a giant price tag is the challenge now.

I'm thinking and failing. What is used to build Abbeys? Stone, wood, glass, metal. What am I missing?

We're in the Lakes at the moment for the first time in years.We often came with other families when our DCs were small and even then there was something about it that made me feel less relaxed. The Yorkshire Dales were always lovelier to me.What is so disheartening having left our very large litter strewn home town behind is the growing amount of rubbish up here too near Windermere and Ambleside. In a cafe this morning a lovely number of staff said how much ruder some people were.She got called the C word the other day when she told someone a table would be available soon when she had cleared it.Times are tough but manners and disposing of your litter costs nothing..It seems the genuine nature lovers and walkers are being replaced by a different type.

This is so sad. I know exactly what you mean. I hope you’re enjoying your time here though.

Exactly this!
There’s definitely a missing ‘middle ground’ here now.
Used to be many slightly quirky and older walkers everywhere, volunteers, people with walking shoes, backpacks, wild hair, lol. Mostly upper working and middle class, dog lovers, canoes and bikes strapped to cars.

Seeing less and less of them now. And whilst this not about social backgrounds exactly, the demand for bistro and booze breaks seems to have driven the old crowd out. Most people here are not going near the mud or hiking, it’s mostly fast fashion, sub woofers blasting from vehicles and less and less people actually on foot.

I think marketing created this, to push the safe, bland middle ground to a previously uninterested public. Possibly a huge link to overpriced airb&b’s, world heritage status and general investment cheeky fuckery.

Everyone should be welcomed to an area of beauty, but the seismic shift from nature lovers to mainstream bling here is really noticeable now.

Also, wtf happened with airb&b’s?
Once an affordable room in someone’s home for those passing through, a pleasant alternative to a hotel. How did this become stand alone properties at £1000 per week? Why not just call them holiday lets?

Our town is becoming more and more built up in common with many places, and in an astonishingly short space of time. We are overcrowded here with a desperation to “build,build,build” but it’s never enough and neither will it be. You have to wonder why our population is growing so rapidly which leads to this.

Everywhere I go (in the UK) seems over peopled. We had a beautiful botanical gardens which was an oasis of peace but the council wants to attract more people to it, and have destroyed its secluded beauty

Yes. I loved youth hostels too and camped/trekked in Europe. Some had an old hippy vibe but mostly attracted a good crowd.

Now I see them advertised and think they will have a very different demographic

Hi, don’t want to put myself but from the area. I’ve found it really, really depressing - exactly as you say, because of Airbnbs. There is no housing I can afford, even with a very well paid job (that I’m overworked in). The villages I knew are full of Airbnbs, people buy up anything, gut it and remove any niceness from a home, and then it’s a rotation of hundreds of different people in one residence all year, problems with noise and trash and rudeness. The villages feel empty and gone. There is no demographic shift I can see that will bring communities back. The communities left are usually much older people who are retirees or others who’ve been there ages and complain about the younger generations moving away. But the county generally is cash poor and we’ve got fairly shit resources, real problems with poverty rurally and in the towns….

Basically, if you’re not very rich (cash buyers minimum) you’re out. Post lockdown the Lakes has become a real “haves” and “have nots” spot, and the difference between the two is awful. It’s just depressing.

Also the rudeness in lockdown… swearing, abuse (physical too), illegal camping and trespassing, breaking into buildings, littering everywhere, that started then and has gone down a BIT but not much.

This month we’ve had increased poaching, car racing, attempted thefts of bikes and quad bikes, someone trying to steal funds from the village hall, someone’s dumped a tonne of rubbish on the fells… police don’t give a shit. There’s a real sense of vulnerability, unless you can get CCTV everywhere… it’s awful. Tbh even with CCTV the police would do sweet FA. And we’re in an unpopular bit of the Lakes no one used to go to before lockdown much (less touristy). It has been SHIT, to be honest.

Oh and with lockdown… total entitlement. Had people parking EVERYWHERE, complaining to us about everything (as if this is Centre Parcs and we’re all staff), people videoing us randomly, climbing into friends’ fields to try and catch lambs for photos (scaring all the sheep). It’s just awful and makes me tense most of the time. Oh and I nearly got hit by a mountain bike last weekend when they were shooting down the road trying to break their record set on their last holiday (literally told me that!). There is NO personal space, no quiet and no respect.

It’s hard to word but if I go to a town or city there’s some places especially on a Saturday which just make me feel all wrong and I get an overwhelming wish to go home asap even if I’m on holiday . I don’t know if it’s some kind of anti chemistry thing going on as there’s some places I’ve loved at first visit e.g Dartmouth but others which give me the worst feeling .

I grew up in Norfolk but have lived in Suffolk for far longer than I ever lived in Norfolk. It is lovely but it is not Norfolk. I still feel that Norfolk is “my” place for reasons I cannot explain.

It is interesting how many places have an atmosphere that cannot be explained. I have had many lovely holidays in Devon but much prefer the south coast to the north coast. In particular, I find Linton and Lynmouth very brooding and cannot wait to leave it. I don’t much care for Ilfracombe either. By contrast, my favourite seaside resort in Devon is Dawlish. It seems a much happier place to me.

Sorry, just to add that OP’s statement “Grasmere reminds me of an open air garden centre with a cafe, some raincoats and a London style hotel. Lovely scenery, but nothing of substance”… totally true. I love Grasmere but no one lives there… I know of two farmers outside it, no one in the town at all. The nearest actual
community would be Workington, Whitehaven, Millom, Barrow, Ulverston, Kendal, Penrith, Carlisle. All of which have lovely aspects, but can suffer real deprivation.

Plus the Lake District national park lot are run by randomers.

Plus planning is a joke… the amount of ancient woodland cut down, old windows ripped out, old barns knocked down for glass extensions… all illegally… and no repercussions.

Plus as I said no policing.

Plus NONE of this matters if you have money. There are no risks or repercussions if you have the cash to gut your home, whack CCTV everywhere, put up a drive gate etc, no one then fines you for your planning breaches… it’s working out well for the twats, to be honest.

@Ohnanawhatsyourname Gosh that paints a bleak picture, and too true, sadly.
There’s definitely a kind of cult of property in the UK, which takes precedence over all else. As I mentioned upthread, it’s a national obsession. It has certainly accelerated since the pandemic.

I wasn’t born here, but I have most definitely fallen out of love with the Lakes. I feel a strange sense of oppression around these honeypot towns, and it isn’t quite the landscape, it’s the built environment, the human distortions…. it feels hollowed out, like a designer product, even.

A few years ago I lived in a 17th century cottage that someone had seen for to chop in half to make 2 flats. It was incredibly charming, but the floorboards showed gaps into the bathroom of the holiday let below .
You could hear them stirring a cup of tea.

There’s a pretty facade to many of these buildings with emptiness hiding behind it.
I currently live in Windermere just off the Main Street down a long, quiet road. It’s quiet and lovely enough here, but I’m watching local lettings prices going through the roof. Many of these places are dives. I think the plan is to get most people shifted into shared houses, with 6 people using the same toilet 🙁

I’m definitely ready to move on.

Purely in terms of how landscapes make you feel I actually find the coast and sea views quite miserable and depressing.

Yes the sea is all very nice on a beautiful sunny day with clear blue skies, but for the (what feels like) 300+ days per year when skies are grey and overcast I find the grey sea just looks bleak, featureless and depressing, it accentuates and amplifies the drab miserable greyness!

I prefer hills, moors and mountains even on the miserable days.

I definitely think you can feel happier in certain areas. I too live in a nice place but just don't feel much of a connection to it. I've lived in quite a few different places and will eventually move somewhere else.

I think properties have "vibes" to them as well. Yes that's a bit woo woo. I lived in a house where the energy seemed very stagnant and I felt like sleeping a lot.

I thought the Simon Reeve programme was really good showing some of the flip side. I’d really like him to do a programme specifically about second homes.

I used to go on holiday to the lakes every Easter as a child and found it very hard. I could see how beautiful it was but couldn't enjoy it for some reason. I'd often cry in the evenings.

I do think the type of people coming to places like the Lakes and other traditional outdoor places has changed. We have a small camper van. We're outdoorsy people - walking, cycling, husband is a photographer, we have a dog etc etc. We don't wild camp - we pay for sites. We use our van for day trips and always abide by any local rules on camper vans and motor homes. It is smaller than a lot of modern SUVs. Yet we've seen a real different in how people are conducting themselves at places where traditionally it would be walkers, nature lovers and generally quiet and peaceful people. We're now parked up with people continually running their engines to listen to banging music, selfie takers, people leaving litter and generally disrespecting both people and the area. It's spilled into remote areas too - at the weekend we were at a woodland in the middle of nowhere and a family in a huge 4x4 screamed up, let their large, untrained dog out to run around and crap everywhere, kids screaming, litter dropped out of their boot and they just took some pictures of the kids climbing on probably ancient woodland and drove off, leaving the litter and dog poo. That's one example of many I can give over the last few years.

Another evening we pulled into a quiet car park to eat some fish and chips and found it full of 'van lifers' pretty much taking up the whole car park with tables and chairs and letting their dogs run around being a nuisance. We left.

Our county has had such a problem with people like this that now all camper vans are banned from car parks overnight. That has caused us big issues as our local parking has been a council car park where we've paid for a permit for our van as not to take up space on the road. Now we are not allowed to park it there overnight permit or not. So it's on the road, taking up precious parking space when the car park is empty overnight. The visitors don't realise their actions impact on the locals.

Why is this happening ? Why have the sort of people visiting countryside places changed? Why have people got ruder? Its a mystery.

It could be the place making you sad. About ten years ago I moved to another country about 5 years ago I decided to go home I lasted a year it's hard to go back sometimes

I don’t know about rudeness in the countryside, it cuts both ways. Since getting a lab pup, and training her well with positivity, I have been approached quite a few times by rude “country” types in Barbour jackets and red trousers telling me what I should be doing. Most if not all their advice is outdated and not asked for. I think this is rude in the extreme. Families are loud and noisy. Children shout when they’re excited. People in camper vans are entitled to get their chairs out and eat their tea in a car park, just as much as @newpeep is entitled to eat her. Live and let live?

I think people who would normally holiday abroad were forced to holiday here during the pandemic, or drive out for day trips, and discovered how beautiful it is at home. Trouble is, they treat it like a theme park as a pp said upthread and everywhere is more crowded as a consequence.

Just one theory.