Is masturbation a life skill?

[MaggieMagpie357]

Please help settle a mass debate (ha ha) that is currently raging in the school FB group.

Year 11s have weekly Life Skills lessons at school, these are a mix of things like money management, apprenticeships, higher education information etc, and what used to be called PSHE, ie sex education, healthy relationships, mental health and well-being etc.

One parent in particular is disgusted by some of topics our 15/16 year olds are being taught in these lessons. Last week she posted in the parents FB group because they had been discussing pornography in the lesson which she thought was inappropriate. Another parent then commented that she was appalled by this, and that they had also discussed FGM - she actually said that her child would never move in circles where this could happen to her, so why should she have to learn about it?

A full list of topics covered in Life Skills is available on the school website, and all children are told by teachers that they can leave the classroom if they feel uncomfortable. Yet these parents insist on these pearl clutching FB posts every time their child has a life skills lesson that they deem to be inappropriate!

So - is masturbation a life skill?!

(To clarify, teachers were not demonstrating this, and it was taught during a lesson on healthy relationships!)

🤣🤣🤣

Maybe not a lifeskill - but important nevertheless.

To dispel myths, old wives tales, sex and dirtyness etc.

I saw sex education in schools as a combination of….
adding to what parents said (if anything)
removing what had been learnt behind the bike sheds (and now online porn)
and answering questions that couldn’t be asked of parents and of what they’d heard from others.

masturbation fits into the above.

Why is it grim? Its important sex education gives a full picture of a healthy relationship. Pleasure is a part of sex. If it isn’t taught as part of sex education you will have many children being taught at home or through abusive relationships that sex is dirty, shameful, to be endured not enjoyed etc, masturbation is sinful or dirty. They need factual education so they grow up with healthy attitudes to sec and their bodies.

I teach it via a Facts and Myths activity - the emphasis is that masturbation is normal/harmless.

In the same unit we cover the menstrual cycle, wet dreams, naming of body parts. Kids can ask factual questions and can submit anonymous questions which I may or may not answer.

The bit that causes most discussion is period products. However, I don't see why 11 and 12 year old boys should be shielded from what a wrapped tampon looks like.

I am pleased my kids will learn about masturbation. Self care is important and they would cringe if I spoke to them about it. My own mother didn't know what the clitoris was while she was married to my dad and I feel sad for her.

Being taught how to masturbate is grim. Mentioning it's normal and why people do it is fine.

@Flegm no one said they were being taught how to masturbate!!!!!! I did mention that in my OP.

Ok, I said what I said!!!!!!

Yes. I have it straight after my contact details on my CV.

Teaching 16yo about masturbation??? They will know more than the teacher! Jokingvaside on the physical side they likely will but on how it has to be kept in moderation, its place in relationships, issues with excessive and extreme porm are things that should be covered??

It's not a life skill but it's important that it is discussed and that it is explained it is normal and not wrong. Likewise with FGM; awareness is critical, children may hear about something happening to a friend of theirs and need to report it.

School is not there to solely teach children about what will impact on them.

I think having healthy relationships and a good consenting, shame-free sex life is a life skill. Certainly contributes hugely to happiness, wellbeing, mental health etc.

FGM should be covered earlier than Y11. Girls at risk are much younger than this. DDs school taught it at the end of year 7, informing the kids of the potential risk over the summer holiday. To be aware for younger sisters, cousins, family friends. Advice on who to contact if they had concerns.

Except that as teachers not only are we CRB checked, but well trained professionals who are well aware of the sensitivity of this particular area of the curriculum. It's not hey kids lets talk about wanking. In some schools the lesson will be done with two adults in the room to protect the teacher against an allegation usually from parents that they said something inappropriate....

I wish it was talked about more when I was at school.

It was fairly common knowledge that boys did this, but I didnt have a clue about it for girls.

For this reason, I spent my teens getting into relationships for sex, had a really busy sex life (almost an "addiction" at some point) because I never explored this or had a clue what I was doing.

I spent time in sexually unfulfilling relationships being very frustrated until at the grand age of 30, I researched and experimented with different toys and can now 100% say that it is a part of my routine and leaves me feeling much more balanced and takes the pressure off my partner.

I wish I had learned more about it when I was younger and I may not have been as promiscuous in my early days.