To tell her she’s overdoing the Botox

[Permanentlysurprised]

Just this really, do I tell my friend or do I just keep my unsolicited opinions to myself?
Just for a bit of context, we are part of a group of friends from Uni. She was a mature student and is 8/9 years older than the rest of us.
She is attractive with a great figure and hair and over the past few years, has really started making an effort with how she looks and she looks better now than she did 10 ears ago.
But recently she’s been doing more and more and has that frozen look, no expression. She’s just booked yet another appointment.
She’s a very good friend, the kind where we always promise to tell the other if they have spinach in their teeth or snot on their nose. I would want her to tell me if our positions were reversed.
YABU Don’t tell her, it’s got nowt to do with you.
YANBU Tell her, be honest, it’s what a good friend would do.

A friend went to an event recently, and saw someone whose face has been changed for the worse by fillers and botox.
It is not a good look, and just looks like someone has had way too much “Work”.
We are only young once!
Nothing can truly replicate our younger faces.

I wouldn't if she didn't ask. If she asked, then yes, but gently.

Is this one of those trying to be a bit provoking to just make a point about something recently topical issue,

Ah la Maddonna and her latest transformation look, that's not a look I think will catch on

I suppose the difference here is spinach and snot aren’t deliberate chives. If you’re going to say something I think asking what she thinks of her current look (as other PPs have suggested) and she might ask for your opinion. Then give it- gently.

I think sometimes we don’t see ourselves clearly when doing regular stuff. Do tanners realise they are orange?

Please don’t tell her. The woman has a mirror, she knows full well what she looks like. She really doesn’t need you to decide if it’s to your taste or not and then tell her.

it’s like saying should I tell an over weight person they are fat. Or an underweight person they are skinny, or someone with over bleached brittle hair it looks bad. Eh no. They have mirrors. Unless she asks, it’s not your place to comment on her appearance.

Choices not chives ffs

Or a smile that lights up a room (literally)

Madonna. Simon Cowell. They all look the same to me.

It's such a difficult one. I have a friend who looks absolutely beautiful from Botox etc in photos and in the mirror etc and that's what she sees. What she doesn't see is that when you talk to her it's really odd as her face doesn't move as it should.

You could tell her that it is best to let it fully wear off before redoing as if you let the muscles atrophy for too long you actually age faster over time (this is true). If she had a good technician they would tell her this! I had the most horrendous botox recently and looked so awful timed exactly for a trip back to see family, was very embarrassed and horrified at all the reunion photos.

Often the frozen look is actually bad technique (so maybe too much in the frown line creating a heavy alien looking brow). Maybe she just needs a better technician, a proper doctor rather than just a nurse/injectables person. Do you have any good contacts? Perhaps you could just approach it by recommending someone great, who would then naturally make her look better.

Body dysmorphia can set it at any age. What she sees in her mirror is unlikely to be grounded in reality. I’d be concerned that she’ll decide to visit Turkey and ask someone in a backstreet to go at her face with a knife next.

Maybe ask if she’s going on holiday this year. Turkey/India/Mexico = ‘Oh really! What a great country. Why did you pick it?

I told a friend she was starting to look like a cat in the eyes, she agreed and laid off the Botox a bit. Sometimes you confirm what they are already wondering themselves. Only you know your friend and the relationship, also depends how extreme it is.

I’d keep quiet. Women who have stuff done to their faces tend to be incredibly defensive about it. Let her crack on. Or not.

I wouldn't say anything. It's not really about how she objectively looks, it's about the confidence that these tweaks give her. I find people talking and moving their faces (or not moving their faces) with Botox/fillers very odd, some actresses can't act any more, but if they feel confident and like they can live their lives more positively, crack on. I don't do any of those things, I'm aware that I'd look better without my double-chin and I do use moisturiser and make-up and I'm happy with that as far as it goes. Some people don't wear make-up and think it looks artificial.

I do the things I do to make myself feel better and allow me to enjoy my life without feeling too self-conscious, I guess your friend is the same.

The only time I would weigh in is if they directly asked and even then I might tell a white lie (a friend asked me about her haircut recently and it was indeed pretty bad but it wasn't fixable at that point, so I said it looked nice and then praised it once it grew out!)

If she’s so insecure she’s getting shit pumped into her face then she’s unlikely to respond well to criticism.

All Botox looks bad imho, it’s just degrees of weirdness really.

😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I have a friend like this! She has turned into a carbon copy of some of the women on programs like TOWIE. I don't say anything because she obviously likes the way she looks and she hasn't asked for my opinion 🤷‍♀️

According to scientists the thing with Botox is that it changes your personality. It can decrease your ability to have empathy.
The lack of movement of facial muscles to the brain when something is distressing over time leads the brain to not register something is distressing at all apparently. People become immune to things which are distressing.

So she might not care one jot what anyones opinions would be at all anyway.

Just as an aside, why anyone thinks the trout pout is in any way attractive I have no idea whatsoever.

I noticed that Kate Middleton at the Baftas has now gone OTT with all that and is starting to look really Pokemon.

Id err on the side of not saying anything tbh.

if she asks you directly, maybe say you think it’s a little much.

I think she has finally pipped Meghan to the post in the waxwork stakes.

Unless she specifically asks "what do you think about my botox?" I would keep my mouth shut. Maybe she just likes the frozen look, maybe she's just very insecure about her aging body and you being younger than her puts her on a vulnerable spot so by pointing that out you may loose her as friend. Again, if she specifically asks then just nicely tell her that the botox gives her a frozen look that you personally don't fancy.

I think we go through life where something or other obsesses us for months, maybe a year - my squint teeth, big nose, rounded shoulders, fat bum, etc etc etc etc - then life gets in the way and you forget about it .............until the next thing crops up.
Perhaps it's to distract us from more serious issues???
Hopefully she will move on to something else in the not too distant future.

Botox often looks fine IMO but I keep seeing the lip filers everywhere & they look so awful! How on earth do these women delude themselves that it’s an improvement? It literally destroys the look of the face - especially the side profile