'Nicola Bulley's reputation 'destroyed' by police'

[MyrtIe]

Article here

The points made about victim blaming and the police disclosing this information to cover themselves are spot on imo.

The usual gutter press are having a field day with this today.

What exactly was the point of it? What's it achieved, apart from compounding the heartache of her loved ones?

YABU - the police were right to divulge this sensitive information as it was relevant to the investigation

YANBU - there was absolutely no need to do so

So what if people were saying the police were doing a shit job? The police just carry on with their job. They're not supposed to get defensive and start spewing personal details to the press to protect their honor.

Or even just "we have evidence that she was struggling with her mental health in the weeks prior to her disappearance" would have sufficed.

I still don't think she's in the water. Suicide by drowning in gentle waters is not exactly simple. While walking her dog and planning a play date and in a work call? It doesn't seem very likely. Even for someone who has in the past had alcohol problems and who is going through the menopause.

Exactly! They have been forced into releasing this info probably to protect the family and friends that are being accused of all sorts but the idiots behind their computer screens and the idiots out roaming the land harassing people because they want to play detective. Information like this always gets released anyway.

They don't read nor did they watch the press conference either, it seems.

At the press conference, when they confirmed she was regarded as 'vulnerable' and 'high risk', the journalists specifically asked about what these referred to and the police said they didn't want to divulge this. Presumably the press/media got wind of the background (presumably not difficult to find out), or as above, and so forced the police's hand.

At the press conference they also said that, although not 100% sure, it seems Nicola never left the area/fields from looking at CCTV. The dash cam footage they have so far evaluated has not had a single sighting of Nicola either so they are pretty confident that she disappeared in that area.

As for seeming organised and taking kids to school and making plans - many people who plan suicide can seem normal and in fact better in the days before, often 'very focused' which makes it very hard often for family and friends to process it when someone takes their own life. It was commented that Nicola seemed more organised than usual. Plus alcoholics don't drink all the time.

The 27th Jan was also the day that that biker disappeared (drowned) in the same river 40 years or so ago. Maybe it was planned to coincide with it, or maybe she had seen a notice or comment about the anniversary of the boy's disappearance which triggered her actions?

Speculation but the abductions etc do seem very far fetched if you actually consider the evidence and we don't even have access to the data/evidence the police have.

It was a bit odd how the family kept interacting with the media but in these circumstances, it's not unusual for families to want to retain hope; there is often a sense of 'guilt' even if it's not their fault, but perhaps because they feel they should have spotted the signs. Which is difficult as often, as mentioned above, the suicide victims often seem normal the days preceeding.

Very sad all round.

In the press conference yesterday the police revealed that she had vulnerabilities because they wanted to explain why she had been deemed high risk and the response they took. This was because they were trying to refute the speculation that has been rife on here and elsewhere

my opinion is it wasn’t that simplistic or linear . I think they did, but also wanted to refute what Paul and Emma have been saying to the media, they made it very clear it was Paul who told them about her issues and Paul knew a crisis team was called a few days before she vanished…the same Paul who has been very critical of the police and saying she’d never leave, everything was wonderful and nothing was wrong, that rhe police have messed up, and strongly insinuating criminal activity.

he didn’t need to reveal her issues, far from it, but he could have went gentler , as could Emma on the media onslaught of the perfect life and happy person description. As clearly it was far from the truth and there was a very good reason the police had rhis as their lead hypothesis, and that very good reason he was full aware of as informed them of it immediately and had daily liaison officers in placing briefing him on the magnitude of this investigation.

in hind sight, the channel 5 interview was a mistake.

I feel very uncomfortable saying I really do not know what would have been right or best. I have only seen that Nicola had menopause problems and was drinking a lot. I would hope and pray that in the world of today receiving this information would only make people more compassionate towards her. A lot has been publicly discussed, including the series about the menopause on TV, so I hope awareness that this is a difficult and distressing time for many women should growing. Women deserve support with this. The drinking, imho, would be as a result of the discomforts she was enduring. Drinking to excess is also very common and often related to anxiety or other problems.
I hope and pray her family are not finding the public revealing of her health status distressing. It makes me feel all the more heartache for her and them to hear she was going through this. It should not be hidden away, there is nothing shameful about either condition. Both are experienced by very many people and any 'normal' person would just feel compassion for her.

I sincerely hope that whenever these sad burdens Nicola was carrying are in the media, the media concerned have the grace to mention that help is available for anyone who hears these sad things about Nicola and is suffering similarly.

I think it was Paul who said afterwards "Just tell them. Perhaps the conspiracy theorists/wannabe detectives will then back off if they know there's certain sensitivities"
So they then went back and released it in a statement

Just my theory.

That’s really not how police press offices work. Trust me. They don’t release medical information to stop gutter press printing stories, they wouldn’t set that precedent and that’s not their job.

With respect, if she walked to a bridge and just jumped off it doesn't leave much to the imagination.

With this case the police seem genuinely baffled, and humans have a limitless thirst for mystery. I've barely followed the case, but I'm not going to be disingenuous enough to say that I don't get why it's struck a chord (for lack of a better term).

I don't know why they've released this information.

Well, you do.

They says why - they have had unprecedented commentary, suggestions, contacts & allegations of negligence.

They have watched Nicola's life & the case being pored over by strangers who have treated it like entertainment, producing more ghoulish speculation.

They released limited information to try & stop this. To make it clear that they have information relevant to the case that they didn't share publicly till now.

But that wasn't enough - immediately people asked - including here - what vulnerabilities? What do they mean?

And so they went further, and gave some details.

And that's still not enough for people to back off and allow the investigation proceed as it would normally, in the context of a tragic case.

Just horrific, entitled vultures, tearing apart not just Nicola's life but all the relevant actors in this, the police included.

On the Times website & the Guardian, comments are closed, MN should stop allowing these threads to be posted too.

It was fairly obvious to me from the off that the police knew more than they were saying. It seemed strange that it made headline news within hours of her disappearance when so many people go missing every day and we never hear anything about it.

If people suffer from significant issues that could be the cause of them going missing, they absolutely do release information like this.

Exactly!

You do know that “She had vulnerabilities and was drinking more” and “She’d never leave us, she’d never walk out on her girls” can both be true at the same time right?

Alcohol issues and vulnerabilities don’t always mean they’re high risk of doing a flit and it doesn’t mean family life is always unbearable

I thought I read that this information was released with permission of her family. Maybe I am wrong about that. I feel incredibly sorry for Nicola and I really hope she is safe somewhere.

What we are seeing with this case and the Brianna Ghey case is a break down of trust in the police. And yet the police themselves are drastically under resourced to handle the public reaction in parallel to progressing these cases.

That’s not wha I said.

I said their motivation wouldn’t be to ‘get there first’ ahead of the tabloids.

Well it does if there was a concern for welfare visit just 2 weeks before.

Very true, so why did you speculate otherwise?

So there's now a number of posts on here speculating on what a 'real alcoholic' looks like too.... There is a massive spectrum of alcohol dependance and a massive variation in people's ability to function with it. They haven't said she's been drinking 500 pints a week and in end stage liver failure, they've said she had problems with alcohol use which was of a significant concern to her friends and family. It would be reasonable enough to assume that it was therefore significant enough to impare her judgment at times and exacerbate and impulsive/self-harming behaviour. It's perfectly reasonable to take it into account when investigating the situation. It's easy to cry misogeny but let's be honest, if she WAS a dishevelled looking middle-age bloke with a similar background the public and the media would be much less interested. Well presented, pretty woman though and we're losing our minds and completely unable to accept that there may have been aspects of her medical history that contributed to her disappearence. I'll say it again, I don't think the police are perfect but I really don't actually get any sense that they've been especially corrupt or careless in their managment of this case. If the public think otherwise though they could always train to work for the police... Meanwhile please let's stop with the unhelpful and disrespectful speculations

@BeachBlondey i agree - but i think its also because she was a young, white, seemingly normal woman going about her business which struck a chord. Similar to Sarah Everard, this struck a chord for me purely it could have been me. However i reiterate, there were two black sisters brutally murdered randomly and locally to me and it got nowhere near the press coverage both these two murders got. If it were two, young, white professional sisters, it would be the top news.

I don't think that MN should stop allowing threads where the motives of the police are questioned, no. Particularly not in the light of recent events regarding the police and their attitude towards women, given that women are the primary users of MN.

I do think that threads poring over maps and YouTube videos should be pulled, in part for exactly the same reasons I think that the police shouldn't have released this information.

If this thread is derailed by posts like that, it too should go. I'll report any posts along those lines and I hope others will too.

The speculation yesterday after the police revealed ‘vulnerabilities’ was dreadful. I reported many of the posts and was told as long as they’re not speculating about family members involvement, they felt the posts were fine

I wasn't aware that was still up, NotMyWorld, but they're fast moving threads and I may well have missed some

IMO the PP was also right in saying censorship isn't welcome either, but the difference between this and the family-whose-name-can't-be-mentioned always intrigues me. I know, I know - the previous family are known to be highly litigious and this one isn't, but it seems unfortunate all the same

But that wasn't enough - immediately people asked - including here - what vulnerabilities? What do they mean?

christ, so you think because the police were asked an awkward question they had to answer? Of course they didn’t! If anyone had actual grounds to be concerned about their conduct they have official channels open to them - the area lead, police complaints commission, MP’s etc. The police aren’t directly answerable to the public and can point anyone with concerns in the right direction.

I have no idea what’s happened to Nichola, but I do know that painting the public as whining five year olds and the police as a feeble parent that can’t say no is just bollocks. There is zero reason for this information being in the public domain.

I don’t think anyone has said she can’t be a real alcoholic? Just that she looks good for an alcoholic. And she does - but as you rightly point out alcoholism is a huge spectrum, and this is why it’s easy for high functioning alcoholics to mask. It all feeds in to my points about lack of understanding around alcoholism. But I don’t think people meant she looks too good for an alcoholic to be suggestive or unkind

Re: alcoholic, she had enough issues for the police to be called to their home. So regardless of whether she looks like an alcoholic or not, this was a bigger issue than people presume. There are threads here where women are dealing with drinking too much but i dont really remember anyone saying the police had ever been called.

I suspect a paper had been given a tip and were going to print it, I had seen rumours about her drinking when she first went missing on social media, it's probably more favourable to release a considered statement then let speculation run wild again. This isn't accusing family and friends of leaking info by the way, I live in a similar place and I know tonnes of stuff about other people that I don't particularly have much to do with. Rumours in this instance with so much social media attention are dangerous and getting a handle on it was probably the right thing to do- but who knows. Also important to remember that people had been coming up with all kinds of hurtful theories that were going to be much more harmful to get daughters than this- that her partner did it as he looks/acts weird and evil (I don't think that btw but people have said it often, imagine reading that about your dad?), that her sister is having an affair with him, her friend stole her identity to give them time to hide the body. These are all real lives being ruined even further. The witnesses being doxxed, people attempting to ruin their businesses, searching their property. Unprecedented fuckwittery from the public does lead to unprecedented action by the police.

Let's not pretend either that many weren't salivating at this new info and calling out for more insight.