to still bedshare? Will anyone care?

[hekissedmybottom]

So services care if you bed share with your child? I'm sharing with my 7 year old and see no end point right now, it works for us. It's a huge bed and it's just us two, same sex.

Is this a "thing" that anyone cares about or is seen negatively by officialdom at all?

Just curious. Obviously don't care what laypeople think.

As long as they have their own bed and are choosing to do it rather than that been the only option then it’s fine.

I can’t comment on officialdom - sorry - but there is research that indicates that co-sleeping is a positive experience for young children, and it is absolutely the norm in many cultures around the world.

as long as they have their own bed, it is fine if they choose not to sleep in it

I agree, fine as long as the child also has their own bed even if they never sleep in it.

That's very true and I do see it as really positive. We both love sleeping together, I love it too, I love knowing she's safe. She would wake in the middle of the night when in her own bed and call for me, and it was annoying but also just obvious she just wanted my company. We shared up until age 2, then she spent 4 years in her own bed but honestly never ever liked it and now we're back together and she sleeps wonderfully.

Yes I see it's about having the option. Thanks :)

As long as your child has the option of their own space. Short term it's absolutely fine anyway

They need their own room, if they choose to go there but aside from that it’s fine.
DD sneaks in with us so it’s often three in a bed, DH will then get kicked out at some point by DD 😂

Maybe for a young child but I think a 7+ year old needs to be developing independence

Just be aware that you might be setting yourself up for future problems. I used to bedshare with my my mum until I was around 6. Then she met someone and it caused problems because I was NOT happy to suddenly have to start sleeping on my own.

Regardless of the 'official' position, it's best for your child that you start introducing separate beds, even if it's not every night.

Nobody will care.

I also don't agree with them 'needing' their own room of course it's nice for them to have, very nice. But it just isn't possible for plenty of families due to lack of housing or affordable housing for a child to have their own room. Very many have no choice but to share with siblings or other family members etc. Don't worry about it. Maybe your child will decide soon to want to sleep alone. Then fine too.

As others have said, as long as your child has their own bed, it’s fine.

I have a much younger one and when they wake up early and I bring them into our bed for a snuggle before we start our day, it’s my favourite.

I’m assuming you’re single…is there any chance you might meet someone and your child will end up ousted? As someone else said, that’s maybe something to keep in mind.

Do what works for you. 😃

I agree that's it's more about the fact that they have the option to sleep in their own bed if they want to.

I'm a fan of co sleeping although mine stopped when they were under 4. I must admit to being very surprised though when a friend told me that her 18yr old daughter was off to university and it would be the first time she had ever slept alone.

I agree but I don't think sharing a bed with me hinders this or I wouldn't do it. I enjoy sleeping with her and I'm 41 and my independence isn't hindered.

No chance of that no because I would never move a man into our home <3

Mine's 9 and sleeps with me most nights 🤣

I think it’s odd tbh
sute it’s just my opinion but a child should be encouraged to see their own bed and room
as a safe place imo and wanting to share with mum at 7+ I don’t think should be encouraged
but there you go

I think it’s best to teach children independence , at this age it would be better for her to be able to sleep in her own bed. I’d also be worried she feels she has to tell you she likes it. As it seems something you are heavily reliant on.

My 9yo DS still sleeps with me and DP when he gets the chance. And he sleeps in his DB bed whose 11 every Friday and Saturday night. Like a sleepover

It’s fine as others have said just ensure they have their own bed as an option too. I always wonder why people seem so bothered by others cosleeping, do you think they will get to 40 and still wanting to bedshare with their parent every night?

I would worry that - when the time comes for sleepovers - she'd struggle with them.

OP, who do you think is gonna come checking in your house to make sure your DC is sleeping on his own?

@hekissedmybottom

Weird username op 😳

I thought you sounded quite nice/reasonable, until you commented about 'never letting a man in to share your home'

How utterly patronising to all us single mums out there. Who like me, have taken a leap of faith and remarried.

I think you intended to sound smug/superior? You don't.

It is odd in our society yes.

Haha no not at all I would be happy to sleep alone again and she knows that.