How do people do it?!

[sameshizdiffday]

Over the last 12 months me and DH have had a combined wage increase of approximately £400 per month - lovely!

Our bills however, over the last 12 months, have increased by more than double that! - not lovely

Now at a point where we're both stuck in our overdrafts with no money to do anything, no hope of a holiday this year (or in the next decade if things continue like this) and I just feel really down.
We're both getting paid 'market rate' for what we do so I don't think a job change would help.

2 kids - 13 and 10 who keep asking if we're going on holiday in summer

I know we're not the only ones in this position so, does anyone have any tips/ advice on what to do?!

Understood re the cars. Although to explain a little:

This payment is for 2 cars and both include tyres/ maintenance package etc so fewer unexpected repair costs. DH has an EV and is the larger percentage of the cost but he commutes quite far so we did the maths and while yes charging his car accounts for approx £160 of the electric bill, he'd have been spending £400+ in petrol/ diesel so made the decision to put a bit more into the car itself rather than buying a cheap car that would cost a lot to fuel and probably then end up breaking down with the miles he does in it.

Both cars were also agreed/ signed up to before the prices went absolutely mad. I'm on a PCP so not really sure how or if we can even get out of it or what I'd then do for a vehicle.

Thanks for the suggestions though, not had time to read properly through everything but will sit and have a proper look now!

And the phone bill is for 4 phones but yes I have been thinking we can cut this cost down, all with different providers and something I keep meaning to look at.

If you’ve got an electric car are you on a tariff like OctopusGo which means cheaper charging overnight? This could really make a difference to your energy bill (plus it really doesn’t take long to get into the habit of running stuff like laundry and dishwasher overnight to take advantage).

That's a good idea I'll look into it thank you

lots of fat in that budget.

£120 for phones lol. Target should be £20.

sky - get a virgin deal for about half that.

£522 gas and leccy is ridiculous. should be
£250 at peak at most - where’s it going?

£580 for cars. £290 each on a car each is actually ok if you can afford the cars, you can’t. Sell one and buy a car with the equity that’s left over. When the other one is cleared - then you can get rid of the old one and spend the £290 a month on another. So you can half that expenditure if you live within your means.

we have 6 digit income in our household and wouldnt spend the above that you are.

Your problem isn’t costs, your problem is debt and cash flow and paying more for things than you could afford in the first place.

With a different mindset your lifestyle could cost hundreds of pounds a month less than it does, that's how people do it.

It's looking after the pennies so the pounds will look after themselves.

A few tweaks to get everything cheaper instead of just paying full price and going for the expensive option will save you loads of money over time.

Have a look at moneysavingexpert.com and make this your new way for all aspects of managing your money.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/family/money-help/

And FFS MN, stop scrambling the links to MSE. I know you probably don't want people to see how to run a massively popular website successfully without cluttering it up with adverts but it's the best resource for people like the OP.

OP you want the Money Makeover in the budgeting section.

@Bard6817
There's no equity in the cars, they're both on PCP deals.
But thanks I appreciate your honesty.

Prior to costs rising so much, we were comfortably affording things so and still had some money to have a few treats. Nothing major but we had a decent family holiday each year and the odd meal out/ takeaway etc

he'd have been spending £400+ in petrol/ diesel so made the decision to put a bit more into the car itself

If he's doing what, 2,500 miles a month then you must realize that's not an average sort of commute cost that most people would have to budget for?

If you're still paying 200 a month on fuel you also must be doing a reasonable amount of mileage.

Well yes, but that's his job I don't really know what else to say about that?! 😂
I was explaining the decision to go EV and hence a higher than average finance cost for that car.
I don't commute as far but yes I drive to work each day and also do some freelance work on top of my day job which involves driving to clients and also drive our son to football training/ matches on weekends so I'd say on average I spend approximately £200 a month on fuel.

Ditch Sky. It's a luxury. That's my piece of advice. We got rid of it last June and don't miss it. We also cancelled TV licence.

We also won't be going on a holiday this summer either - can't afford it. It will be day trips with picnics from home.

People saying cut down on car costs: that's not really manageable for lots of people. My husband and I both commute to our jobs. We spend about 300 a month on petrol between us. We are still paying off our cars but who can afford 15000 on a good second hand car outright? Where we live, you won't get a second hand car under 6000 anyway, so we got newer ones. No train where we live. Car costs aren't always tweakable.

When did you take out the PCP deals? It could be that you do have equity due to the shortages and the balloon payment was set at a time when prices weren't as high as they are now - friend of mine has just released over £5k from hers due to fortunate timing with the end of an old deal and arrival of her new car. If it's your DH who does the mileage, could the car that you use be scaled back?

On the matter of gas and electricity, do you pay according to monthly use, or equal monthly direct debit? If it's the former, it won't be anywhere near as bad in the summer, but you might find it easier to budget if you pay by equal direct debit - then you'll pay, say £250 pm all year round, instead of £500 pm in the winter and £150 pm in the summer.

@BarbaraofSeville DH car was taken out about 2 years ago and has 2 years left, mine was only last year. We did look at the idea of a 2nd hand car for me but I had no deposit or anything going into it (my previous job provided a company car but I moved jobs and had to get my own) and the interest rate against anything 2nd hand was so much higher, plus there wasn't much in my price range that didn't have over 80k miles on the clock and would probably cost £100s in repairs in 6 months time! Maybe it was a silly decision I don't know but I'll look into that thank you although.

Gas and electric is on a monthly DD

Well, you've answered your own question really.

Most people don't drive 2,500 miles a month for work. They also can't afford to spend £500 a month running two cars without taking into account fuel or charging costs.

My car costs me about an average of £150 per month and that includes insurance, fuel and annual costs like an MOT.

We don't have SKY, we just have the cheapest BT broadband package - no landline either. We pay for Prime and Netflix but otherwise it's just free streaming sites or YouTube.

@sameshizdiffday can I ask what your household income is? We're just about to move and expect similar outgoings (but no kids) and I'm worrying about the bills. It doesn't seem to me that any of your outgoings are abnormally high, we need two cars too and used cars are false economy at the moment for me.

We have cut down as much as possible, giff gaff mobiles £10 or £8pm. Virgin Media package we cut down to broadband only.We no longer have TV licence, switch in between streaming services. We have cut down to 1 old £3000 car between us. We shop at Aldi, Lidl and B&M. I try to get cashback or discounts on every purchase.

However we've lived like this for years, there's more we can cut if needed (like hair and beauty, alcohol and days out) but those things currently make life more bearable.

You are overestimating car repair costs.

I ran my 10+ year old Honda until it was over 140,000 miles. It was fine and never broke down!

He needs to get a closer job or move closer to his work.

Those kind of commuting costs are crazy and not sustainable.

If only it was that simple!

And good for you, my sister runs an older car and is constantly complaining about the unexpected repair costs that come with it!

We took out a low interest loan from the bank for our car. Monthly payments but at least at the end of the term it is ours. Something to consider for next time?

Of course her bills are high. There's loads that can be cut if necessary without much detriment to lifestyle (I understand that sometimes you're in a contract, but if you're concerned about costs, don't take out expensive contracts).

OK, your mortgage is what it is, but you can reduce uncertainty by making sure it is as affordable as possible and take a fixed rate for stability. You probably can't do much about council tax or water, but make sure it's affordable as possible when choosing where to live.

Likewise, don't buy a big old house if you're concerned about the cost of heating it. Be mindful of energy costs and don't do things like tumble dry when you could line dry, or take endless long showers.

The OP could spend a lot less than she is on mobile phones and pay TV. I don't know why people still pay for Sky when you can get 90% of what it offers for about a quarter of the cost with Now TV, and you don't even have to pay full price for that, as there's always a deal available. We've had it on and off for years and never pay more than a fiver a month for movies and less than that for the entertainment package.

You can get huge amounts of mobile data and unlimited calls and texts for under a tenner a month. I don't know why people sign up to such expensive contracts now. Madness.

Definitely need to try and break the 'car payments' cycle where possible where you're always paying monthly for a car. Easier said than done I know, but I think MN is sometimes a bit unrealistic about cars with lots of 'we bought a car for £600 and ran it for years without it ever breaking down or needing money spending on it except the odd windscreen wiper' stories that don't reflect many people's RL experiences.

Yes definitely, thank you

Well yes, but that's his job I don't really know what else to say about that?!

Your original question was how do people do it and the answer is most people don't have crazy commutes costing them grand a month unless they're on megabucks. You must realize they aren't typical costs