If you had the chance to move to the USA right now, would you?

[HiddenGiraffes]

Context is it's a major city we've lived in before and liked, and we're currently in London, and like the area we live too. Some family in both countries.

I'm just curious if, given the opportunity to get out of the UK right now, people would consider the US a superior alternative.

No, this is true! Bread is artificially sweetened for the most part, if you want decent bread then you need to get sourdough from a market or, unbelievably, ‘ketone’ bread which has less sugar added.

The bread thing is a bit exaggerated, there is plenty of bread in bags that isn’t full of sweeteners etc. bit it tends to be healthier brands with a lot of whole grains so isn’t your typical British style white bread. All supermarkets have plenty of fresh bread though so there are plenty of good options in most places

I'm a Brit but live in the US and love it here! The US is so vast, every state is different - it's like lumping every country in Europe into one. We live in Massachusetts, not in a city and my children are getting a great education in excellent schools. There are plenty of states I wouldn't want to live in, but they're as diverse as Poland is to Italy. We're lucky to be on good salaries with great health insurance though. Conversely, speaking to family back in the UK, everything seems to be doom and gloom over there and there's no way we'd move back!

I live in Mexico and the country is filling with digital nomads from the US. I belong to a couple of fb groups for expats and anytime someone mentions how dangerous Mexico is, they all protest that it is much safer than the US and its true. In nearly every category of crime, the USA is at twice as bad as Mexico and sometimes six times worse.

I’m British and live in the area you’re thinking about moving to. There’s a fair bit of dramatic rhetoric on this thread. But if you’ve lived here before then you know that. Ultimately there is no right answer, it depends what you prioritize as a family. We won’t ever move back to the UK, that doesn’t stop me missing some things or wishing some things here were more like the UK.

I agree with you on healthcare. Our experience here has been outstanding compared to the UK, but if you don’t have good insurance / can’t afford it then it’s a scary system. Abortion isn’t inaccessible in Maryland at all. I had multiple MMC that required surgical intervention. Both done by a Dr who performs abortions, both done within days and in as supportive, calm environments as can be in the situation.

Guns in schools / anywhere are scary, no pretending otherwise. But my kids aren’t traumatized by active shooter drills, I don’t know any parents who’d say that (I have 2 kids in elementary school). I absolutely wish they didn’t experience that, and every time another shooting happens, everyone I know feels nothing but frustration and anger.

We choose to stay here because our kids have a better life, better opportunities. I like the optimism, positivity and drive of the American psyche. We have a beautiful home in a lovely, safe area. We are surrounded by interesting, educated people from a wide range of countries.

I wish the US generally was a more equal society, that the politics were less crazy and corrupt and that there were fewer (no!) guns. Nothing is perfect, worth weighing up what really matters to you and what your experience has been. And maybe a quick visit to see how you feel?

If you're rich and white then maybe. Otherwise definitely not.

I’ve heard so much on these threads about active shooter drills it’s nice to read a reasoned appraisal
of what actually happens. Also note that all states have different approaches to guns and women’s rights. Just choose carefully!

I’ll be very honest with you, if I was still living in the uk I would be VERY concerned about my teenagers ‘out and about’ in our old market town. Every week I hear of kids being mugged, attacked or harassed. Teen culture here (at least where I live is much more focused on sport, working in the community and academics. There is - of course concern over drinking and drugs but it’s much less prolific than it was in the uk.

Or baguette or Italian or sourdough or rustic or any other varieties from the in house bakery in the supermarket.

Not this again

No! For any and all reasons stated.

Yes, I would. It would be very dependant on what area of the US and also dependant on having a job with good benefits and healthcare.
One thing I would be wary of is university status if you have kids who will want to go to British unis or you return home, you will lose your home status and access to student loans if you are away for long enough. We have been away (not America) and whilst we still have home status, we can't access student loans.

American countryside is breathtaking and huge, and so varied, so many different experiences in one country. Yes, there are downsides, the gap between rich and poor is extreme (but the UK is catching up there). Healthcare costs are an issue, but I would take the US over the NHS if I had decent insurance, the NHS is shocking, I don't think people realise how much better the care is in other countries. Our families experiences have been really, really terrible lately.

I haven't RTFT, but I'll guess there are rants about junk food, chocolate and cheese. Like any country, you pay your money and make your choice. There is a lot of fresh good food available, artisan cheese and chocolate makers etc. If you are eating orange plastic cheese and supersize McDs then that's your choice.

So yes, I'd consider moving. Especially as you have family there. Having family nearby is a huge plus (assuming you like them!). We have family there too.

I like the optimism, positivity and drive of the American psyche.

Going back and RTFT now...But I should also have mentioned this. There are cultural differences, but yes, the optimism and the lack of false modesty. I find British self loathing so tedious. My cousin's kids are American, ask them how school is going and they will say what their strengths are, not boasting, just honest, they will also say what's not going well.

Gosh there is so much hyperbole on this thread… I’m another Brit in the US (in a place that sounds very close to where @missmonstermunch is) and my life is nothing like some of you seem to describe.

For example, medical care is better here than I experienced in the UK - importantly we have options. In addition, here in MA we have mass health, which is pretty good as a safety net. In terms of cost, (as somebody up thread said) with health and dental insurance we are paying similar to what we both paid in the UK for NI (people in the UK seem to forget that they pay for their health care via national insurance). Also, has anybody read the NHS dentist thread on here? As someone in the US that blew my mind…

In terms of time off, my vacation time is 22 days, plus public holidays, and (in my experience) there is a bigger culture of workplace trust here, with less presenteeism.

My kids are getting an amazing education, in an amazing school and are not traumatised by school lockdown practice (although that doesn’t mean shootings are not a concern for us, but similarly they are not part of our daily life).

Also as @Notinhampshirenow said I’d be very worried about my teenage kids right now if they were back in the UK, both in terms of future opportunities and the teenage culture. Teenage culture where I am is simply much more healthy.

Of course it isn’t perfect here, but it isn’t what folks on this thread seem to think. We have a beautiful life here that we simply couldn’t have in the UK. Do I want to denigrate the UK on this thread? No, I love the UK too and miss it on a daily basis, but this is definitely the better choice for us.

Also, it is a big, big country. Life in a blue state, with an international community (colleges, business, NGOs etc) is probably the only part of the US I could live in.

@QuizzlyBears
My closest supermarket (part of a local chain) offers multiple eastern European rye breads (Latvian, Lithuanian, Polish, Russian), Italian breads, French, middle eastern pita and other flatbreads, sourdough (white and whole wheat), multi grain bread, multi seed bread, and much more. This isn't a hoity toity supermarket by any stretch.

@giroux
YY to your comments, especially on healthy teen culture.

Nope.

Although I've never lived in the US, I travel there a lot for work (NY and Chicago) and it's fun, but no.

I've lived in London, Paris, Tokyo, Seoul and Singapore, but the US feels far more dangerous to me (a straight white woman) than anywhere else (politics and general culture aside).

In saying that, obviously the US is a big place and my experience of NY and Chicago may differ from others' experience of, I dunno, Boston or Missouri or San Francisco.

@mathanxiety
chuffed to get a shout out from you, I read many of your posts on the Living in the US thread years ago :)

Oh, that part of the country is really lovely. DC is a great city if a slightly insufferable company town. You spend a lot of time, if you hang out with the wrong people, talking about who got invited to what ambitious senator/morally dubious elder statesman/ up and coming young journalist's cocktail party. But if you can handle that, you can handle the area.

The property taxes will be insane; in return you have some of the finest state schools in the country. There is a bit of a smug bubble that doesn't always recognize the world of people outside of it, but that's true in tony suburbs everywhere.

Maryland is on the whole a very sensible state politically. Interestingly, it's one of those northern liberal states that still elects republican governors, but they're so far to the left of a conservative democrat in the south, for instance. But culturally it's fairly progressive and has some really good laws.

It's also near lots of good stuff: a pretty close ride/drive to NYC, Philly, the shore, even some very mediocre skiing.

The gun issue is real. But I'd feel safer in that area than most.

Since you've lived here you know: America is a spectacular place to live if you're rich. It's dreadful if you're poor. If you're living in those suburbs, I assume you're comfortable (not to be crass). You'll be near some of the best culture, hospitals, universities in the world. There is wilderness within an hour's drive. And lovely big old rambling 1920s houses everywhere.

I'd do it.

Since you've lived here you know: America is a spectacular place to live if you're rich. It's dreadful if you're poor.

I would add to this, if you're not white. The teen culture stuff a few posters have spoken about reminds me of this. If you're a black teen, the US often doesn't seem so safe or inclusive.

I think child marriage is a thing in some US states, no? Though I’m sure those are probably not the same areas you’re looking at OP.

I think there certainly is a problem with teen culture in the UK. However, I don’t see or hear anything at all about attacks on teens where I live - but in my part of the UK teenagers appear to have an intense focus on appearance, social media, being on the mobile as much as possible, and often a sense of lethargy which I find a bit disturbing. These things stand out for me because apart from the appearances element - it’s totally different to growing up here in the 80s!

Absolutely not.

My husband is American. I’ve also spent quite a lot of time there with work/hobby but absolutely no way would I live there. We go occasionally to see his family but he says wild horses counts drag him back either.

LOL - yeah, that sounds like Idaho. Some wealthy areas near Coeur d'Alene but a LOT of places people move to 'be left alone from the government' and do the survivalist thing. They drive around with all that 'protection' from what or who I dont know, there isnt anyone up there and these folks never leave Idaho. Some areas of the (western) US you would indeed carry a rifle on your truck due to wild animals. But the OP is looking to move to suburban DC where I highly doubt anyone other than an interested hobbyist keeps gunsmithing equipment in their basement.

@OP

Does the move have to be permanent? If not, could you set things up so that you have a five-year stretch, and then see where you're at? A lot can change, for worse and for better, within five years.

It sounds like you're very keen to move and looking for reasons why, rather than reasons why not.

To be fair, and to balance my previous post, there is a lot that I do miss.

I miss the range of classes and opportunities for activities that were offered at my high school, and that are still offered at a lot of schools. My cousin's kids still get to star in school productions and play on school soccer teams. My own high-schooler in Scotland has nothing but exams. I miss the broad general education: I think my own high-schooler is missing out with the way subject exams and university entrance is set up here. If I could afford to send her to uni in the States, I would consider one in a good state.

I miss being able to get annual checkups at the doctor's office and I never understood why the NHS won't do these. I miss children being able to see a pediatrician, rather than a GP who may or may not have an interest in children's health.

The range of food (including fresh) that my parents get at their local grocery stores is so much broader than what I can access. I miss store bakery Italian bread. If there's a Winn Dixie near your new neighbourhood, the cakes are amazing.

I miss being able to swim in the sea, in ponds, in outdoor pools. The spring, summer, and autumn climate should allow you to do more outdoors.

Having family close by sounds like you'll have help getting to grips with everything.

Big things like time off, abortion rights, health care expenses, the risk from guns ... all of those things are real and haven't gone away. Thinking of those risks as just a "hick state" problem isn't wise. The Newtown primary school massacre took place in Connecticut. The people who want abortion banned in the hick states want it banned everywhere.

I would also advise caution about knowing your employment rights. If the working parent ever gets laid off, you may not be entitled to a notice period or severance. Depends on state law and company policy, IIRC. Something you can think about and prepare for, in any case.

My niece and nephew, and most of their friends, now have bullet proof backpacks for school. Not just for school shooters but as a safety thing for going to and from school, or activities etc.
So for everyone saying, guns aren't really and issue, and a school shooting is unlikely to happen, and that their kids aren't bothered by shooter drills there are thousands of US parents who are having to adapt their lives and those of their kids to their increasing violent world.

But I agree that if you're well off, have good insurance through work, are white, MC, then the quality of life when it comes to the cars you drive, the size of your house, your kids sports, their education can be much better than here. If that's what's important to you.

Yes, but for reasons that we are both nearish retirement, would like a change, and could rent our house out in the UK very easily so still had a base to return to.

Not for reasons that the UK future is bleak (though economically it is going to be tough) or that the US is some kind of nirvana. But it would be interesting to live somewhere new for a bit.

There's a very slight possibility that DH could get a job in his field in the states and yes, we'd take it. I'd have to do some kind of consultancy.

The biggest thing stopping us is the dog!