That threads starting "how do people afford....house, car, holiday, etc" are annoying

[bobbytorq]

I don't understand the purpose of the above threads. Is it because people really don't know and think there is some magic answer that eludes them? When people post about how they can afford it, they then get accused of lying or bragging. The simple answer is that people who have expensive things usually have enough money to pay for them. I'm lucky to have lots of friends whose income ranges from minimum wage up to seven figures. There is no hierachy/power/status attached to that and it's just a fact that my friend who earn more can spend more.

Or things like choosing luxury retailers (both small and big ticket items) with lifetime complimentary care and warranties. In contrast he would have to spend a fortune on replacing things over the years.

This is interesting - because job titles can often not give you a clear idea of what people earn - eg I know the IT manager where I work earns between £30-35k (from the advert last year), DH is currently helping with the recruitment for a job based in North East UK for a title IT Manager with a base of £85-100k and other “Roles in IT with Manager in the title” can be over £200k - it really can vary a lot with a similar title once you get away from public sector jobs where a certain title puts you in a set band and changing wage band requires a more fancy job title.

Being able to spend time on study and self improvement is a luxury not everyone has though.

You can have the drive to come home from your 11 hour shift and start studying but you have to be able to afford the course fees and you have to be able to set time aside, which you may not be able to if you have other responsibilities.

Plus you need to know what to study to improve your opportunities. Careers advice is woefully poor in this country especially if you are an adult looking to retrain.

Nobody is saying that the Stockbroker hasn't worked hard or made sacrifices to get where they are but there is more to it than that. That's why people get mystified, they think to themselves "I worked hard at school, I went to uni, I got a good job and I put in the hours what am I missing?".

Google, student loans (they are not just for uni), bursaries (some cover things like childcare) needs must.
From own experience, UK has actually really good options for adults to retrain or study to go up a level compared to many places.

They're interesting threads if you find the replies where people share useful information that allowed them to balance their finances to do the thing/have the thing that they value.

It's more annoying when it becomes a weird mix of "obviously it's credit" and "we are the jealousy" / " we work hard for our money so why shouldn't we".

I do wonder the opposite, though like you I'd never ask what people are spending all their money on! Our household income isn't vv good by any stretch of the imagination (though it's definitely not awful). Yet yesterday we were discussing whether to buy a brand new electric car, which we certainly could afford.
No inheritance here ever, no secret income - just our regular jobs, we didn't buy our house for a tiny amount and benefit from huge price increases and we have fairly large childcare costs still.

Yes but other people not having the knowledge of how to do things doesn't mean you didn't work hard because you did have the knowledge. It's very easy to make excuses for people but ultimately if a person wants to change something about their life, they have to do something different and they may have to endure less-than-ideal circumstances while they're making those changes.

For example, in my group of 12 friends that are now scattered worldwide only 2 (including me) have bought a house as singles and 2 as a married couple. Some of the others have commented to me about how lucky I am to be able to afford a place while they still rent. Except i've:
-done multiple professional certifications and switched professions to get a better job
-spent my last bit of money relocating to another country for better prospects which then paid off
-bought most clothes & electrics only in sales
-bought a refurbished phone and went sim only PAYG for £10 a month
-bought yellow sticker food for dinner and mystery shopped for most of my lunch meals
-mostly went out using deals & vouchers
-didn't turn on my heating until it got unbearable
-learned to cook using YouTube etc etc

I'm bummed I only just started dating my partner as we could have possibly bought together and future-proofed the house a bit more, but i'm happy I maximised my purchase with the tools I had and would never snidely bitch at my married friends being able to do so.

My friends have a mixture of benefits and disbenefits over me, but ultimately I don't doubt that all of them could have bought property by now if they had made some of the sacrifices that I did. And that same reason is why some will always look to have more than others, the sacrifices they made (along with some luck).🤷🏾‍♀️

@strivingtosucceed

I agree with what you've written. I've moved on more than one occasion to find work. I've scrimped and saved, eaten yellow sticker items for years (and had friends turn their noses up at them!). I've studied extremely hard for professional qualifications and have paid to attend training courses, with no guarantee I'd get a job at the end of it all. It's paid off and I'm now a home owner (mortgage) with a fairly well paid job.

Not everybody has the ability to attain the skills required for my job and even less have the inclination to study the subject and dedicate the time to become an expert. That's why it's well paid. But that doesn't mean there aren't other opportunities available. No matter what field you work in, there are opportunities to progress.

I think too many people are happy to 'hope' for a better life, rather than actually making it happen. There is always somebody else to blame as well, rather than asking yourself some tough questions regarding what you could do to improve things.