..to feel emotional about parents offer?

[Mumofgirls89]

My mum messaged today and mentioned a discussion my dad instigated about providing money for my daughters school dinners every week. She mentioned it would be done for every grandchild but at the moment my daughter is the only one in high school. We had a conversation about how expensive the school dinners were and that she wanted to have them all the time. She has just started a new school and is trying to stay with her friend as much as possible across the day including queueing!
I instantly felt emotional, I wanted to refuse because its not their job. Its not about me and my pride, they want to do something nice for their granddaughter and I'm sure they talked about it before hand.
My parents have been pretty good to my children.
I have received nothing from my eldest daughters biological dad even from a child maintenance collect and pay case, the money my parents are offering is more than legally required by their bio-dad...how sad is that?!
What's the best thing you're parents have done as grandparents?

My parents have been our rock. Last summer they postponed their summer holiday (we didn't ask) by two months so they could do childcare for us while I got started in a new job.
That is only one example but there are many more. They have endless time (when not on holidays ) for the grandkids and are reaping the rewards for it, I'm so pleased they have each other.

My in laws are fantastic grandparents. They buy school shoes, take them for several days overnight during school holidays, give money for ice cream on holidays and have carefully decorated bedrooms in their house to suit the girls ❤️

My in-laws pay for the DC to have swimming lessons and my mum always gives them holiday spending money.

It's very much appreciated!

You are very lucky OP, mine don’t give anything emotionally or financially!

My nephew has just bought his first house at 23 thanks to his grandmother's savings plan for him. She has set up the same for my two and it's very reassuring to know that they will (one way or another) have enough money for a roof over their heads as young adults.

Absolutely nothing from my parents, despite having the means. I just don’t think it would even register. But, I plan on being very generous with my own grandchildren if I am ever fortunate enough to have them.

My parents are paying for an expensive once in a lifetime school trip for my DS. My DM cut a holiday short flew half way around the world to be with us when our DS was son intensive care and to help us with our other DS. My grandparents did similar things for me and my cousins. That sort of love and generosity (with time and live even if you don't have the money) is what family should be about, and if you show it it flows through the generations.

I made the mistake with my own grandparents, of not taking them up on their offer of financial help* when I had my own family. I thought it would be unfair of me to take from people living on their pensions.

Now I know how sad I'd be if my DD turned my offers down. It feels good to help, and times are so hard now for this generation of parents of toddlers and newborns.

So yes, I've helped with several things over the last year while my DD has been on maternity leave with my second DGC. It's given me pleasure and meant a lot to my DD.

• advice for grandparents though. Make a clear offer to do/fund a specific thing. My grandma simply said "if you ever need anything, please tell us". That's infinitely much harder to do than if someone says "you're washing machine has died? Oh no. Please let me pay for a replacement, as I know what bad timing this is for you"

My parents have always been hands on & very involved in DDs lives (dad passed away before DS was born).

If you ask the girls now that they are 21 & 23 they'll tell you the best thing they ever did as grandparents was just being there.

For me it was that but also buying a property for me & DDs to live in when I separated from ex-h, it was never my property (they had a few that they rented out so it was an addition to their portfolio) but having that security while I got back on my feet was a godsend - I'm sure it was partly for selfish reasons though as the other option was I moved in with them with then 4 & 2 year old DDs 😂

Can I just say how much I'm enjoying seeing posts that are just as delighted by and appreciative of things like ice cream money and shoes, as others are by cars and houses?
This is just a lovely thread.

This thread has really touched me OP so many kind and generous people. I am not lucky enough to have any GC. My late DM was the most fantastic DGM to my DS and her other GC. I was a single parent with no help from my useless and abusive EXH. My DM never had two halfpennies to rub together. She gave up work to look after my DS so I could go to University to retrain as a teacher. She looked after my DS for years while I built up my career. I loved being able to treat her when I finally had a little extra money. My son is the lovely man he is today as a result of her love and influence. I do everything I can to support my son and his partner. I miss my DM every day.

My MIL bought a good quality electric keyboard for my young dd when she started having keyboard lessons. I was chuffed because I know DH wouldn't have spent as much as she did.

FiL has put away £100 m/month for each of my children since they were born. No pressure, he just did it.

DM bought them both their first shoes too.

When I was suffering from HG and was bedbound/in and out of hospital with a toddler to look after, MiL cleared her diary for a week and came to look after us. She didn't say she was coming, she just arrived like Mary Poppins. She looked after DS, cooked, cleaned, filled the freezer, cleaned some more, ironed and was generally wonderful. Left FiL at home - 4 hours away - with a freezer full of meals to warm up. She was still working, so took annual leave to do this.

My mum took me and my young children in after fleeing domestic abuse. She let us live with her rent free for a year even though she doesn’t have the space. I was able to get back into a good financial position and we secured housing after a year. We live very close to her now and she always helps out in emergencies. I’ll always be grateful for her.

I could not even list all the bits and bobs my parents have paid for over the years. I very much intend to pay it forwards and support my kids as much as possible when they are grown.
When dd1 was badly injured my lovely MIL did a ten hour round drive to come and see her, and she basically arrived with a whole new wardrobe for dd1, as the clothes we had couldn't fit over the bandages.
FIL (they are divorced) meanwhile has visited twice in my kids lives. His loss IMO.

@YouWithoutEnd that made me cry. How lovely of your dad. Best of luck if you decide to go for it.

I honestly couldn't survive without my mam and dad, my husband have been suffering from severe depression for the last 18 months, and he was the sole breadwinner in this house until I've been able to get some part time work to work around the children, because I'm basically a single parent, they pay for the kids activities and slip me money for bills all the time, honestly I can't say in words how much they have helped me through this, I would not have survived without them ❤❤❤

I agree with the "being there"

We had elderly neighbours who hadn't had dc of their own, but were lovely with ours.
On their birthdays they would not only remember, but sellotape a £1 coin inside. Two of my adult dc were reminiscing about this the other day. However, the lovely thing was, they were "there" for my dc, when my dc wanted to tell someone their wobbly tooth had come out, or they scored a goal in football, or got a gold star for something at school, or a badge in Rainbows or Beavers. They were definitely extra 'Grandparents' for my dc, and mostly it was about having the time to listen to what was important to my dc on that particular day, when my dc trotted round to tell them their important 'thing'.