More money or more time with Dd

[Coldestyearsince2013]

Dd, is four and a half and is currently at Pre school part time. I work the hours she’s there and have been very lucky to be able to choose my hours.
We just about get by on only Dh’s wage, but don’t have any left over for proper holidays etc.
Now I’ve started working again, we’re much better off and rather than just meeting the bills and everything needed for Dd, we can now save and have some treats for ourselves.
Work have now asked if I want to work weekends too, three hours each day for a good amount. The extra money is very tempting, but my goal was always to spend as much time as possible with Dd whilst young. She’d be at home with Dh, but we’d be missing out on family time.
Pre Dd, I worked full time plus weekends as I enjoyed my job and enjoyed making money, my priorities changed when she was born and I was able to stay at home with her, but we struggled at times.
Would you go for the extra money or time at home with family?
It’s hard for me to turn down extra money of any kind 😬

10-1 one day is nothing!! Seriously, I would choose the Saturday and get her booked into swimming lessons / gymnastics type activity during that time where DH takes her every week. They'll barely notice you're gone and it's good for everyone.

One day only, on the Saturday and then your DH and DD can do something together. Sunday is family day.

I'd take the job as you'll still have quite a lot of time with her.

This is one of those examples where the twee phrases actually apply:

Don't count the hours, make the hours count.

You already have plenty time with her. Loads more than average. 3 hours with her dad on a weekend morning would be genuinely good for them both

I wouldn't want to work weekends, although I'd consider doing longer hours during the week if DD could stay longer at nursery. Family time at weekends is pretty important for us, and that can only really happen at weekends - its not just about time with my dc, but also my DH! Three hours isn't long, but it depends what time of day it is - my dcs are at their best in the mornings, which is when a lot of children's activities are scheduled, so I wouldn't want to miss out on those.

Agree with this. Few families can have no money worries & no time pressures.

I'd take at least one of the days. I'd normally say time is more important, but when you have plenty of time with her during the week and it's only 3 hours, then I think it makes sense to do at least one of the days. The second day depends how much you want/need the money.

So OP currently works 3 days a week and is proposing upping her days to 3 full days and 2 half days, meaning she will still have 2 full days with her DC during the week. This is more time than her DH has with their child as he works Mon-Fri.

@Coldestyearsince2013 ignore those who are trying to make you feel guilty, especially as they seem to think it’s only mothers who shouldn’t work full time but fathers get a guilt-free pass. Do what works best for your family. I work far more than my DH for both the money and love of my job and it works well for us. Money may not be everything but it’s a lot easier to enjoy the family time that you have together when you’re not worrying about bills, COL and able to fund a comfortable life for your family.

As you have two days with DD in the week already and during the weekend work, she'll be with her dad, I don't see a problem at all! If you enjoy the work too, then for me it's a no brainer. 😊

Exactly this. I have a lie in on Sat morning followed by a gym session while DH takes our child swimming. I don’t really see them until around 11am and still manage to live guilt free!

Absolute no brainer.

More money - which DD will inadvertently benefit from.

@Coldestyearsince2013

what does DH think?

what are your weekend mornings like now?

I think I'd do saturday, DH & DD could have a nice morning 'just the two of them' like you get in the week. Then do whatever weekend jobs you need to do & really enjoy your Sundays.

then befire you know it, it'll all change again for the summer and again when DD goes to school in September. (Or whatever. (Point being it's not a lifetime commitment!).

plus make it ckear you want the earlier start as soon as one becomes available!

More time child children , you can work when she’s older you will never get this time back again!

I think one weekend morning is fine, but 2 is too much.

I’d go half and half like a pp has said - so one weekend day.

I do still worry that I miss out on time with my (older) kids by working full time though

Go for it. You already have 2 days off. Definitely get her swimming lessons on the Saturday so DH can take her.

Sounds like you enjoy it and it's good money. What's the job?

I know how your feeling but I would never sacrifice weekend family time, can you work longer hrs in the week and put her into pre school for longer hrs? She will be starting school in September for 5 whole days a week, longer hrs at preschool would benefit her more than you working weekends. I'm also intrigued to know how much extra they are willing to pay for 6hrs over a weekend?

Whatever works best for her family is what she should do.
That was just purely my opinion.
Zero judgment from me,we all do it different.😊

Time with family. You have enough money and you are not struggling.

If the money really is that good I'd do 1 weekend day. But to never be able to do a day trip as a family would be a deal breaker for me for both days.

Don't feel guilty! Take the shift, it's a measly three hours, you enjoy your work and the money would be beneficial too.

I work every Saturday and have always had weekend shifts due to the nature of my job so I suppose it's no big deal to me. DH just gets on with it, has a usual weekend day with the kids either at home or takes them to the beach or woods.

My mum also worked weekends and evenings and whatever she had to while we were young. I harbour no resentment towards her. It's just life.

I'm sure you don't feel that guilt now (I truly hope you don't) and it's very sad you were made to feel that way. We each have the right to an opinion just like we each get to choose whether we work 80,40 hrs a week or work part time or decide to be a sahm.
I don't judge anyone,ever for what they do with their family.
I was merely stating an opinion,like everyone else.

One weekend day so DH can do an activity with DC. Really a non issue in terms of you’re missing out. Sounds like DH has no 1 on 1 time with DC now so that will do both of them good.

Ignore the ‘you’ll never get the time back’ brigade making you feel guilty if you to spend every minute with your child.

It sounds like you really like the idea of doing it so on that basis I think you should BUT what will happen when she starts school? She's already 4 1/2 so school must be soon and then you won't get the time with her during the week and will also have lost have the weekend.

I wouldn't both weekend days, or you get no time for a family day out with the three of you. One day could be good though, one on one time for her and your DH.