You cannot make memories

[FelicityFlops]

Just that. The human brain remembers and recalls things that cannot be programmed into it.
Why don't people understand this?
Yes, you can have or give people wonderful experiences, but you cannot dictate that these will become "memories".

Sure but a wonderful experience stands a good chance of becoming a memory, e.g. if someone paid for me to take a trip on a hot air balloon, I'd like to think I'd remember that!

Blimey, do you take everything literally while getting an irresistible urge to 'get people told'? 🙄😄

It’s a trick to market products and experiences to you. As though you need to buy something in order to “make” Disney advert style soft focus memories.

It's a silly phrase that got started during the scrapbook craze.

Pretty sure there’s a strong link between amazing experience and memory. 🙄
I think you may be taking the phrase “making memories” too literally.

Ironically, it's often said by people who drag their kids out to "experiences" every time they have a day off school - with so many things going on, there's no way those kids are going to remember anything much of it!

Lots of things affect how memories are stored in the brain, it’s not random.

So if you’ve decided that this will be a memorable experience and have assigned significance to it, and put time and effort into planning it, you’re more likely to remember it.

Like making a shopping list, even if you forget to take it to the shop, the act of making the list means you’re more likely to remember what you wanted to buy.

1. It’s a phrase, it’s not that deep, you’re overthinking it.
2. It makes perfect sense as a phrase. People tend to remember significant events. Making a memory would therefore reference doing something of significance.
3. You absolutely can programme memory. In fact, you can convince people (particularly children) to genuinely remember things that did not ever happen or that they never witnessed.
4. Stop being goady. You know exactly what the phrase means.

🙄

Of course you make memories, every day when what you’ve seen and heard gets stored into long term memory.

If you want happy memories of an amazing experience than you need to book that experience. Of course it could all go tits up and you might make bad memories…but yes humans do make memories.

Um, no - you do in fact physically make memories. This is neuroplasticity. The reorganisation of neural pathways in response to experiences, which you access later as memories. The encoding and accessing of those memories influences how easily remembered they are in future.

it’s intrinsically embedded with marketing for those sticky queuey waspy “big day out”
places with huge ticket prices in my mind.

you can also make memories hiking a hill, costs less too and there’s no queue (unless it’s Everest)

It's just a phrase, Christ sake. Don't use it if you don't like it.

I mean it's a highly irritating and cliched phrase and people who go out of their way to "make memories" sound a bit neurotic and stressy...

But actually as a parent you can have a big influence on the sorts of memories your child makes. At a most basic level you can protect your child from harm as far as possible and give them a loving and stable environment.

At a less fundamental level introducing your child to a wide range of interesting experiences is bound to create memories of some sort and, perhaps more importantly, deepen their intellectual and emotional register and help build a strong bond between you and your child. That doesn't have to mean foreign holidays and expensive days out, but a child whose parents spend quality time doing things with them is likely to be mentally healthier than one whose parents can't be arsed doing anything other than watching TV all day.

Just because a phrase is naff and over-used doesn't mean it's not truthful.

Part of making memories is reflecting back to strengthen them - “Do you remember that time on holiday when…” More seriously, after my mum died, I wanted to make sure we still talked about her and the nice things we used to do so those memories wouldn’t get lost.

But yes, you are being overly literal and picky.

Funny you mention balloon rides - you can make people believe they did this, even when they didn't.

As for me, I remember a load of old crap and often forget the stuff I'd really like to remember, so OP YANBU.

You are demonstrably wrong.

It's a phrase I see most often on Facebook posts - and every one of those Facebook posts stands a very high chance of popping back up as a memory on its anniversary...

(Yeah yeah, I know that's not what you meant - but realistically it's what's happening)

'Sunrise'. The sun doesn't rise. It doesn't really move at all really. We move around the sun. Idiots 🙄

'Moonlight'. The moon doesn't create light, 'moonlight' is just reflected sunlight. Ffs.

Just live, laugh, love hun.

Ok - I will now say 'let's make things happen which are very likely to end up as memories' 🙄

That's funny! I would like to go on a hot air balloon ride - maybe I can convince myself I've already been on one 😆

I know what you mean OP

It used to bug me, but ultimately it is just the human condition, people trying to control what their kids will remember...

It's exactly this need to control all aspects of their kids lives that will make the teen years so much harder

Do let them have the illusion

Just nod and smile and "like"

I did one in October - it was incredible, and I have photos to prove it 😀

YANBU in that you can't choose what people remember - even a kid who just watches screens all day would have special memories of a really good programme or time they completed a game. It's still worth trying, but you have to accept you can't guarantee what will stick.

I think thus far my oldest would remember Disneyland Paris (from half a lifetime ago) although youngest, who was only 4, says it's pretty blurry.

I remember a daytrip to Cambridge when my dad pushed a family friend with us in the river (it was a boiling hot day); going to a stately home with my brother when he was in his mid teens and I must have been about 5; doing family trails in the National Gallery among other things.

I think things like being on holiday are more memorable though. I remember holidays (or anything where Im in a different environment) much better than a random Tuesday.