AIBU to decline Exit Interview?

[chickensinthebed]

I am moving onto a new job and have been asked to attend an exit interview. I declined one as I thought 'if you have nothing good to say just keep quiet' but my manager is insisting that I have one saying that it's compulsory that I have one. Really? I thought you could decline one- I didn't know it was compulsory. But anyway, here are the reasons why I declined my exit interview.

1. I am a starter in my role but a lover of research and have been very contributive to my team. However, some of my comments (in regards to what research says) has not been received well by some of my managers (mainly my line manager) and since then I have been micromanaged.

1. I applied for a higher position (within my team) did not get it (obviously) but it was my manger who was conducting the interviews and I just knew I was wasting my time . But no worries, I got offered a same higher role, within another company. So that's ok.

1. Suddenly put on an informal performance management plan over, I believe , silly reasons. I received my new job offer before I know I was in an informal performance plan and my manager was querying with me if she should ask HR to inform the new employees (who I will be starting my new job with) that I am on an informal performance management plan.

1. Anyway (of course) I passed the informal management plan and my manger told me that when I leave, they had already hired someone to take my place and it wouldn't be too long. Ok- fair enough it's a business and they got to keep meaning but it did feel a bit ouch.

1. I contribute a lot to my team, way more than on my salary. Even to the point we're my colleagues, who were much more senior to me, were asking me to make a presentation on this topic and that etc. which is fine. I love it. But I don't think I was valued - more so from my line manger. But it is what it is.

Anywhoo... I was informed that I had to have an exit interview- and it could be with a line manager or another team lead. I declined because... well what's the point. I am moving on. They are moving on. I don't see a point in "lying" during an exit interview. I might as well save my face and decline al together.

So firstly, AIBU to decline an exit interview and can your job enforce you to have one.

I’d do it and tell the truth. When I had mine I sent a letter so that it was recorded officially to HR. I’d ask for Hr to be present

Just say no, it's not compulsory and they can't make you. There is nothing in employment law that states an employee must have an exit interview. There's nothing they can do to make you take one and they could be legally liable if they do or say anything to your new employer that may cause you to lose your new role.

If you absolutely have to go then my strategy would be to be very neutral and not say much at all. Let them do all the work. Whatever they ask just say you are moving for better opportunities. Don't elaborate on what they will be.

I refused to go to mine. It was with HR. I got around it by saying I was very busy wrapping up the job so please could they clarify what exactly they need to ask me - they weren’t very specific but it was to fo with my reasons for leaving, my experience of the organisation, etc. I emailed a response and said it would have to do in lieu of me not being there.

Even doing that was a mistake though. I find it very difficult to lie so I told the truth and in essence I think I burned a bridge.
I should have said nothing.

My advice is make an excuse and don’t go. It’s probably expected rather than literally compulsory. I really don’t think they can force you.

As English isn’t your first language do you think perhaps your manager got frustrated with grammatical errors in your work, particularly if it’s client facing?

And how is OP's grammar relevant in any way to her question? What a twatty comment.

If the OP has languages in addition to English it is an asset for any job. Grammar is not a problem

Write an email to HR to state you will not have an exit interview unless it is with HR because you don’t believe the feedback will be constructively taken on board by your LM or other manager.

I left a company under a cloud last year and it is written into my contract that I will complete an exit interview.

I requested mine should be with someone senior in another division and HR so I could raise my issues without it becoming nasty. I’ve burned my bridges within the team I was in because I raised a lot of issues about my line manager, but wild horses wouldn’t drag me back there anyway so I think I’m safe!

This.

OP you can't spell manager

I would refuse. I don’t see why people who leave, who may have gone through stress and angst to do so, should put themselves out to improve the company.

Managers get paid to facilitate a smooth and productive flow of work. If they don’t, those above them should deal with them. I don’t see why an exiting employee should do their job for them.

Exit interviews should normally be done by HR, as a neutral third party. Agree to one with them or just decline it.

If you do have one with your line manager maybe try a no comment type approach.

I declined to do mine as the situation had become do toxic. I offered instead to submit a written exit interview if they supplied the questions. It was so bland i am glad i did bother doing it in person.

Say you are happy to do it but only with an HR manager. This is generally taken as a strong indication that the line manager is a problem.

I left after making complaints about a colleague but nothing changed.

I was the only one that didn't get an exit interview because they didn't want to hear what I had to say.

In your case I would insist that it is with HR or you will not be attending. I would be tempted to take in a friend who could "take notes" act as a witness.

Good luck.

Well it might give a more balanced view as to why their manager obviously isn’t happy with their work. Of course having multiple languages is an asset in some roles and very admirable but if you are producing work in English and dealing with clients, it’s a pain if as a manager you have to double check and correct work all the time. JMO.

@FannyChmelar if the manager wasn't happy with OP's work she'd never have interviewed her for the next role. If she had a problem with a language barrier she'd never have given her the first role. It clearly isn't an issue.

I doubt very much they can compel you to attend. But if you do, just say something generic and bland. "I'm leaving because I'm ready for a new challenge." Etc. You're not compelled to bare your soul.

Just have it with someone else & be honest.

@FannyChmelar

English is my first language. What a racist comment.

I declined one andcthen just left thry can't force you, just politely declined, decline decline.

If they make you be neutral your leaving because you have been offered a better opportunity elsewhere that is all