Comparing heights of children

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I have a mum friend who often mentions her kids’ heights when they happen to be taller than mine at the time. Like oh is James taller than Ben now? Oh yes look he is. And with our girls as well. I don’t get it. My DD is taller than hers now I think and suddenly it’s not mentioned.

She herself is quite tall but within normal range.
My sister is 5ft10 and often mentions her height. I’m not that much smaller than her.

aibu it really doesn’t matter if kids are taller or shorter unless you think there’s an actual medical problem?!!! Not sure why she keeps mentioning it.

“Growing like a weed” tends to stop that sort of boasting in my experience 😂
my children are all very tall. People love a good discussion about how such and such is “catching up”

When I was young people used to tell me sympathetically that they didn’t think I was going to be very tall - they were right I’m only 5ft, but I never understood why people thought it was such a bad thing to be on the shorter side 🤷🏻‍♀️I like my height (or lack there of)

Totally agree. I'm "short" too (although not as short for my ethnicity), I like it 😀
It's certainly never held me back in anything (except if I need to reach something off a high shelf 🤣, but then I just ask a tall person or get a chair 🤣)

@Mamaneedsadrink we only grow til we’re perfect …just didn’t take us as long til get there 😆🥂

Cheers to that! ☺️🥂

Well I got to 5’9” at 11…when did you stop growing? 😉

@BashfulClam i think I stopped at 12 or 13, lol. You can join our club of perfection too 🥂😁

I just shout up but I stopped and just had to wait for everyone to catch up.

I reckon I stopped at about 12 or 13 too, I honestly don't know. I was always the smallest, still remember all the kids wanting to ride my bike when I was about 9 because it was such a novelty 😆

I do school runs for my 2 dgs. Dgs1's class are a tall group generally, in year 5 several of them are taller than the class teacher who is about 5'4 - height is generally not commented on. Dgs2's class seem to be more average. There are about 3 mums whose children seem to have, according to them, a growth spurt every week and are going to be so tall when they grow up - the rest of us just smile and nod politely! However with dgd I am going to have to learn to practice my smile and nodding more as everyone comments on how tiny she is - she is on the 2nd centile for both height and weight and has been since 3 months old. She is now 16 months and surely these parents realise that dd and I have noticed by now that she is short for her age! Dgd is happy, healthy, reaching her milestones appropriately and following her centile lines so I'll carry on smiling and nodding and agree that yes your 3 months younger dd is indeed taller than dgd!

I was rejoicing in this today, seeing my four strolling through town:
6'1", 6', 5'10" and 5'8".
I'm 5'10" - I live in a tall world, what can I say ???🙃

It's not completely true that there isn't anything you can do about it. There was a really interesting programme about this on Radio 4 a few weeks ago presented by one of the Operation Ouch doctors (the whole series is excellent and worth a listen TBH). We are all born with a genetically set maximum achievable height, but a large number of factors play into whether we reach it. A PP is correct that pre-puberty, many of the very tall DCs are the height they are because of overeating, but this doesn't mean they're going to still be that proportionally tall as an adult. They have essentially just used up more of their allocation early, and in fact then run the risk of the extra weight starting puberty earlier (which is known to stunt ultimate adult height, as growth tends to stop a set number of years after puberty).
The Radio 4 show had the fascinating example of identical twins who were separated and adopted to families in different countries (US and Norway IIRC). The Norwegian twin grew to be notably taller as her environment/lifestyle/diet allowed her to come closer to reaching her genetic potential.

This is fascinating, I might take a look. I find it hard to fathom though when you look at families where everyone is exactly the same height (both on my mum and dads side)

I've said it in a protective way too. My ds in particular was tall for his age and people would expect his behaviour when he was 2 to echo that of a 5 year old, my sil especially (even though she knew his actual age). I had to remind her that he wasn't being naughty having a strop but overtired because he was 2 and hence couldn't keep up with his older cousin. Funnily enough she never mentions his or my eldest child's height now they are taller than said cousin. Their dad is 6ft2 and I'm 5ft3. I was the tallest girl in my class in year 6 and probably one of the shortest in year 11. I don't know if they will be like me or shoot up more as they get oldet like their dad. I can't control it so don't give it headspace.

People who are like this woman are so tiresome. If it annoys you, ditch her.

The worst thing is when children/teenagers in the family and friendship groups are made to stand next to each other or back-to-back so that everyone gathered can compare heights. My kids absolutely hate this and get called grumpy if the refuse to do it. Me and DH are both shortish and (duh) so are the children. His brother and wife are both taller so hardly surprising that they always 'win' this little game.
DS gets endless comments at school about being less tall that many peers. DD is an amazing netballer and plays at a high level outside of school in a shooting position. In spite of that at school, she is often passed over for taller players who can barely catch/throw and who barely move on court and don't know the game. They're chosen over her simply because they're tall.

Some people are just like it. A friend of mine has a thing about height, but is also a pretty poor judge of how tall people are - recently said her youngest is now 6ft (haven't seen for a while, and is 13 so could be growing like a weed!) but I saw him and he's no taller than me (5ft 7). She's quite petite though so think anyone taller is a giant!

I am inwardly very pleased my son is tall but I never articulate it in real life

How interesting! So obese children are less likely to be tall adults even at the same height as a healthier peer? If that makes sense?

5’8 isn’t tall?

I think 5ft 8 would be tall for a woman but not a man

How interesting! So obese children are less likely to be tall adults even at the same height as a healthier peer? If that makes sense?

that's my understanding - as their height is forced through overeating and May slow due to earlier onset of puberty

Life must be so hard for you 🎻

Yikes! I think I've mentioned childrens heights in the past, other people's children, in a just something to talk about rather than standing around in silence with parents I don't have much in common with type of way, eg "oh crikey hasn't she shot up she was tiny last time i saw her bla, bla bla" I shall never do it again, need to find new chit chat.

Oh my goodness OP, I thought I was the only one who had to deal with this. My DD's friend's mum was like this for years! It's only stopped because we change schools and rarely see them now. After every single holiday, half term, long weekend, plus randomly she'd comment on the height of my DD vs her DD. After play dates and sleepover too! It was of absolutely zero interest to me. No matter how bored I sounded though, she continued. I started to avoid her because if it.

Incidentally she and I as similar heights, as are our partners - all normal range for our sexes.