To think that allowances should be made for mental health conditions and neurodiversity in the workplace?

[FromTheSoul]

I have complex mental health problems and am ND. These things are known about at my place of work but I don't think allowances or considerations are made in the same way they would for a physical illness perhaps. Even though many mental health conditions can also present physically.

I feel like when you say to someone that you suffer with anxiety, SOME people will not take it seriously or will be dismissive. At my workplace I've told a couple of trusted people how bad my mental health can be. For example, recently it's been very bad. I've lost weight, had to increase my meds, seen a private psychiatrist. I have a mix of health anxiety, ocd, ptsd, pnd and a history of panic attacks. As well as that I'm neurodiverse. These things have been clinically assessed which my medical notes will show. So it's not just anxiety at a lower level, mine can be severe.

Up until the last couple of years, post having my children, I've masked these problems at work but it's become harder to do that. I feel that I can do my job, I want to do my job but every so often, I might need allowances to be made. But does this mean I have to let everyone know? I don't really feel comfortable with that. As it is, I have about 5 people at work that know. I also don't want management thinking I'm not up to doing my job because I can do it.

I don't want to say what the type of workplace this is as it could be outing. But the pressure is on in the type of work.

But I just wonder if mental health and ND was better known about (still!... in 2023) and considered in the workplace generally, then things would be different.

Allowances should be made for every kind of disabilities including physical.

Your employers are the problem.

We are getting more and more student nurses coming on placement with action plans for anxiety etc. it's really tricky to make allowances for it to support them. The ward is busy and patients need to be cared for properly. There just isn't time for taking time out for anxiety attacks. I'm not unsympathetic at all. But we have a job to do.

Similar with trainee teachers. They only want to teach one or two lessons occasionally and don't want constructive criticism of their lessons. If they get honest feedback, they don't feel supported. They often don't want to plan their own lessons. This has been a pattern over a few years now. And we have a few mentors, so it's not like it's one arsey mentor.

Obviously the sink or swim approach to pgces probably wasn't brilliant, but fuck me, if you survived that and your probationary year, nothing was ever as bad again.

I possibly am a little unsympathetic. But kids whose teachers have long periods of absence have a shit deal.

If you can't handle a stressful job, then don't have a stressful job. Do something more menial. That's what happens with people I know in RL.
Some of the examples here sound like people basically want to be spoon-fed and hand-held, which ultimately means someone else will have to pick up the slack

I agree. It's one thing asking for reasonable adjustments (unsure what OP is expecting herer) but sometimes the adjustments or 'leeway' people want isn't reasonable and the jobs not for them. Hopefully this isn't the case here and OP will be able to discuss with OH/HR/managent what would help her manage her condition so she can fulfil the role

www.ambitiousaboutautism.org.uk/what-we-do/employment

Ambitious about Autism has lots of resources for neurodiverse people in education and employment.

If you can't handle a stressful job, then don't have a stressful job. Do something more menial. That's what happens with people I know in RL.

I think a part of the problem is that ‘progressing’ at work is presented as the norm and as something we should all aspire to. When actually for a lot of people’s mental health, and general quality of life, sticking with a lower-paid lower-stress job would be best.

But we’re all fed this line that once you’re good at a job the next obvious step is to try and get a promotion to the next level, rather than carry on at your current level. And yes I know it’s bound up with issues of pay and income, but we as a society need to stop idolising progressing at work, and stop to think about the links with stress this causes.

I don't understand this at all, why pick these jobs. It sounds more that they want part time jobs for full time pay? Or someone to do the 'hard bits', or the idea of the job but not the actual job.
What happens in these situations, do they eventually leave? Sounds very difficult having people like this in your 'team'.

That's what the world is becoming it seems!

No resilience at all.

I agree with this. Some people with disabilities will thrive in a stressful job. Others won't.

Although I wouldn't say menial, just something suited to the way that person's disability manifests.

As in if you get anxious speaking on the phone, don't go for a call centre job.

Sometimes, no allowances can be made. In my last job, nothing could be done, and I had to soldier on like everyone else.

The crux of this is “reasonable” adjustments. And tne problem is that sometimes there are very widely different ideas about what is reasonable.

I used to work with someone with a chronic and serious mental illness and it could be very difficult at times because they would not engage with Occupational Health. They thought they could do the job, but would inevitability have a relapse and just drop everything. We used to have to pick up the work (not the kind of work place where you could leave stuff not done). We were all under pressure and distressed by the situation at times - seeing a colleague have a psychotic episode in a meeting but them completely denying that there was anything wrong - it’s not a sustainable situation.

I know that trying to manage this colleague drove my then boss into ill-health themselves. The problem was intransigent - this colleague was not capable of holding down the job full-time but proved very evasive in engaging with support. It became a disciplinary matter unfortunately. It was awful all round.

Yes this is better, menial is probably the wrong word. I just meant "low stress"

@jessieminto what you describe is dreadful. So sorry to read your experiences

I’ve also been in this position. I was the manager. It impacted me greatly and of course the rest of my team.

How can you expect people to make allowances and be more understanding if you don’t feel ‘comfortable’ telling them? people aren’t mind readers. Bit baffled by your whole post tbh

I hear you!

Some workplaces are over reliant on those of us with robust mental and physical health - or maybe we’re just good copers!

They are and they should be.

However, there needs to be a proper occupational health assessment and what adjustments are appropriate and necessary.

What reasonable adjustments have you requested?

Commiserations, @StClare101 - I left that particular work place. I think it’s really tough on managers who often have NO resources for this sort of thing.

And sometimes, a mental illness is trickier and more difficult to manage than a physical illness, because there’s a whole denial thing going on.

In the situation with the student teachers, I wouldn't have the nerve to come right out with it and say i only wanted to work x amount of lessons and I didn't want to plan the lessons myself.

How do they say it with a straight face?!

It's incredibly entitled and the (so-called) adult equivalent of getting their mum to write a note to excuse them from PE.

There's a woman i work with, who has been on sick leave for about 3 months, or thereabouts.

She's now come back to work, but is constantly asking for more time off and asking to leave early.
I heard one of her close colleagues on the phone to his manager complaining about her unreliability, because they can't trust her to actually complete a task.
So someone else has to routinely also her job as well as their own.
It also begs the question of what she is actually doing at work.

It's an untenable situation, really, and something's gotta give. Especially because of the bad feeling it's stirred up. People get resentful.

I wonder if OP will be back let us know we have helped with her situation.

This is one of the main reasons I don't disclose having a serious disability. I don't want to be lumped in with people like this.

Generally I've found that they are. But YABU to expect that allowances should be made without sharing it with management, just as with a physical condition.