To think people need to stop over sharing SO MUCH on social media

[yorkshirepudsx]

People share wayyyy too much online. Particularly about their kids.

I was just sat having a scroll of Facebook and came across a post this lady made, photos of her daughter (5 or 6 years old) led in a hospital bed. Then there were selfies of herself in the post, with a filter and pouting whilst the daughter is in the background super unwell!!

I went onto her profile and had a nosey and every little bit of information was on there! Which hospital, which ward, what was wrong, etc etc.

Then I realised after having a nosey on other peoples profiles etc, so many parents do it!! And it makes me sad 😩

Albums titled with the child's full name, date of birth, then photos of their children in their school uniform showing the logo and everything.
Then they post exactly where they are and when, whenever they go the gym, supermarket, work, etc, they check in, and tell everybody exactly what they're doing.

And the worst part is half of the stuff on their Facebook is set to 'public' - and then they have tiktok, Instagram, all set to public too.

All I can think is how unsafe this could potentially be for children?
Absolutely anybody could go onto their profiles, find out all the information they need on the children, what school they go to in which town, etc, they can easily get photos of the kids too - know everything about the children's parent's, where the parents are on what days of the week, etc etc.

It just makes me feel uneasy and a bit p*ssed off on behalf of their kids too.

I barely ever post anything on Facebook, all of my social media profiles are set to private anyway, but still, people didn't know I was pregnant until they saw me in person with a massive bump/pushing a pram 🙈 but I feel as though some people take it way too far.

I'd of cringed so much and would have felt so pissed off, if now, as an adult, my mum was on Facebook with photos of me in a hospital bed suffering with sepsis whilst she posed next to me, or if she was sharing memories on Facebook of photos of me sat in the bath, etc, for the whole world to see 🤦‍♀️

Is it just me?? Am I the weird one for being super conscious of what I post online?
I just feel like there's a limit. I understand people sharing their good news, or sharing the odd photos of their children/loved ones, but I just can't understand the need to overshare so much. It's quite sad really

i find it a bit weird that you went to all that effort to scroll people’s posts and past posts on Facebook. But then I also find it odd on here when people have the time and inclination to go through posters old posts to try and catch them out. Honestly just forget about it. You do you and let them carry on posting for likes.

I kind of agree, but that's why I don't have FB, Insta or TikTok. If you're not paying to use it, you are the product. It's your private world that is being sold for someone else's benefit.

Just leave FB, it's a cesspit

Just having a nosey whilst I have 10 mins & got stuck in the Facebook hole of being too nosey lol.
But just made me think really, I guess you're right though it doesn't directly affect me as I'm not like that

I agree with you, it is all kinds of wrong. Also people on IG who make money from sharing their children over and over, the children cannot consent and the exploitation of them staggers me but then it has become so normalised we barely raise an eyebrow.

Yeah I might leave it, it's not even funny anymore (I like looking at funny stuff, memes etc) but it's all so super serious or pretentious now.

Yesss! I've seen that happen loads too, I just can't help but think it must be damaging to the child(ren) in years to come

I kind of agree, only for safety reasons. I think it's ok to share about yourself, but perhaps not so safe to share so much about your children. But it's each parent's choice.

I agree, but when it comes to MN, there are a few posters who don’t live in the UK and never have done. except for short periods decades ago, but who will post about the British and the UK in a way that makes it sound as if they do. It is sometimes merely amusing and other times plain wrong or outdated. I call them out if it’s serious because they can mislead people.

I agree, I don’t really understand Facebook / Instagram privacy settings so I never put my children in photos on social media and I never mention holidays until we’re back and the. I might put some scenery shots up. I’m a member of local groups and it always amazes me what people share - such as photos of a naked child asking if they have chicken pox etc and I think the instagrammers who make their children public are unethical to put it mildly.

True:

If you're not paying to use it, you are the product

It's even worse.

Not only you are sold to any advertiser willing to pay, but you make yourself an unwitting guinea pig in experiments in psychological manipulation. If you wander what I'm on about just do a search on "facebook psychological experiments"

Not to forgot how facebook was used for vote manipulation in the Brexit saga.

I agree to an extent, about sharing private/indentifying information that could leave children vulnerable on a public page.. especially when you know there’s people who will literally scroll through your page for an extended periods of time literally looking for said information to then parent shame them on a mumsnet forum.. and other weirdos. 🫣😅

But if your Facebook is private, and I mean private and you’re friends list are people you’ve met in person, know and trust. Then posting photos (not of uniform) is ok. I think most parents are in constant ‘risk assessment’ mode when it comes to children. - I wanted to post a photo of my DD after getting a gymnastics award, but she was wearing her gym hoodie that has the location/class that she attends. So I didn’t post that and instead just sent it privately to my family - even though my page is very private it still doesn’t feel right to post anything that could be a risk.

It's amazing how much some people share isn't it, I don't post when I'm on holiday either!
I guess you have the same mindset as me,

I do like Facebook for some things, like keeping in touch with my family that live abroad & seeing the funny videos etc, but this side of it just bugs me!

I think if the profile is set to just friends that can view the content then thats fine. I like to show friends and family our kids updates. Public profiles with kids pics and info I certainly wouldn't do, strangers looking would scare me.

I despise any parents attention seeking when their child is ill or hurt and 'checking in' to hospital or taking pics of injuries 🙄That's the lowest, yuck.

Until reading MN I never realised how seriosuly some people still took Facebook. It's such a dated mindset.

(That's not having a pop at the OP, by the way, if anything it's in agreement.)

Yeah if it's fully private then 100% go for it! I have family members who have private Instagram pages to share things on and they only have family following them, etc,

But it's just the public part that confuses me.

Somebody I know had an argument with her partner (of whom she has 4 kids with) because he didn't like her posts on Facebook lol. 👀

I agree - I'll put the odd picture of my kids on FB as I have family who live abroad and it's easier to share it on Facebook than email or WhatsApping them all separately! I also post updates on my Instagram but it's occasional and nice things like "look at the drawing my youngest did at school" etc.
I have a "friend" from the school gates who frequently posts pictures of her children's faeces online (really 💩). Her kids are older too, at primary school with my kids, and they often "do their business" on the bathroom floor or in the bath which she seems to think is hilarious. She's friends with a lot of the other mums on social media, and I feel like the whole thing makes them targets for bullies so the whole thing is just bizarre. She too would share the exact location of her children which just seems like a huge safeguarding issue imho, as well as obviously a breach of privacy.

Yeah - agree, especially about the proliferation of tiktok/instamommies sharing and pretending it's about parenting when really it's so they can vapidly pout and stick their bum out on camera. It's narcissistic, disingenuous (it's not about helping others or parenting, it's about showboating yourself and making money) and gross and makes me seriously worry about their maturity levels considering they're meant to be parents. Not to mention as previous posters have said putting the kids at risk and they are too young to give consent. How will they feel about it when they're older?

I'm more bothered by the fact that some people feel the need to keep sticking their tongue out in pictures. It looks juvenile and childish.
I have actually put some people to unfollow rather than unfriend them because of how they come across on FB. Some people feel they need to tell the world that they bought their DC 75 Christmas presents, post pictures of their meals and tell the world they are off on holiday for two weeks - just asking to be burgled. Idiots!! ............. and breathe!! lol!!

Yes! And it's always the same people that do it, I see it on my newsfeed a lot - you'd only need to search the hospital/location to see their posts too 🙈

& I know I sound weird noseying/snooping, but that first post caught my eye and seeing it was public just made me curious of how easy it is for anybody to find info on people, just have to go on their profile and see their cover photo album/album names to know too much info really.

And i apologise if this came across as 'mum shaming' as somebody mentioned??

Hopefully if people haven't realised their posts are public/how easy it is for strangers to have a nosey, this might make them check and change privacy settings? Idk it could help

Breathe rainbow!! Haha,
I get you though!! Or the trout pout hahaha

There is a lot of oversharing.. the ones that get me are constant kid photos, constant selfies, and photos of people on their deathbed.

Noooooo!! Not poo 🤣🤣

For me it's the thought of when their kids get older, it will alls till be there for people to see & what if they get bullied for it 🫢