To think that by and large, most successful women are generally academic but successful men are a mixture of academic, lucky or average?

[HammergoHammer]

I don't quite know how to talk about this. When I had my daughter I hoped she would be academic more than anything. She really struggles with school and I don't think deep down that she will go to university. She wants to work with children, and has been obsessed with babies since she was a toddler. I am aware that things change, and she is only eight but school are concerned about her being so behind and she has a learning support plan.
I so wish that it was my son who struggled because well patriarchy. Out of my friends, all of my successful female friends have degrees, some have degrees and aren't successful (like me) but I know very few who aren't 'clever' be that emotional, academic or know a skill or trade. Even then, as a woman, we are paid so much less for our skills (compare a plumbers salary to a hairdressers or vet assistant). Yet I know plenty of men who are of average intelligence or below, no charisma or connections who just have ended up on 40k a year.
I just worry she's going to struggle financially, even doing something she loves, or be dependent on someone else.

Its a difficult conversation to have because in the age of equality women and men can do any job they like are there are no male/female jobs.

However I think there are more opportunities in traditionally male jobs to earn more than minimum wage, with zero qualifications and a criminal record and rubbish personal skills (like getting drunk and fighting, being a bit flakey with timings) than there are traditional female roles where you can do that.

" women and men can do any job they like are there are no male/female jobs."

I don't 100% agree. There are still some jobs that require physical strength that the average woman doesn't have.

@Gwenhwyfar

I do kind of agree. I mean my niece went into construction. She grafts. But she’s strong and sporty and also quite masculine overall. I can’t imagine my DD being able to do it. She would moan like fuck about the cold weather, but then so again so would my son 🤣.

I dont agree with it myself! And i wrote it. But i always get told that women can do any job, its just the industry needs to change. Eg smaller pack sizes, or different tools ...

@Spendonsend

All sorts of factors really. I mean my niece is still a rarity working as a young builder but so far she has been treated absolutely wonderfully by her male colleagues who have taken her under their wing. The one difference is she receives gifts from customers like beer, flowers, chocolate etc to say thanks. The males don’t get the gifts.

If I had a female to converse with during the time my kitchen got done I would have loved it to be honest. She’s very personable and chatty too. I would have thought bloody good for you and I think a lot of people do, hence the gifts she receives. But it is a lot physically, she gets very tired. Her muscles are now massive but long term you do think, how sustainable is that career. I don’t know much about it.

absurd fucking thread

Yeah, I know what you mean.

Women generally need to be exceptional in some way to be really successful. But lots of very average men end up in great positions. Then the exceptional women are held up as proof that the organisation is inclusive and sexism doesn’t exist.

You see it even in children’s TV and books. There’s one female character and she’s incredibly clever, while the male characters are all average. It’s supposed to be inclusive but it’s really not.

I've always said that a penis and a posh voice will get you anywhere in this country, including no. 10.
I spent most of my working life in banking and the succession of well spoken idiots who ascended rapidly was still a thing up until I left in 2008.

While I take your larger point about financial ‘success’- finishing a PhD involves a great deal of work, stamina, problem solving and creative thinking.