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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Potential Nanny has history of drug use

138 replies

Snuggy75 · 12/01/2023 09:54

We are currently recruiting for a new wrap-around care nanny for my primary school age kids and I have been made aware that one of the candidates (who has great references, gets on great with the kids) has a history of using cocaine and has got at least one police caution for it approx 18 months ago. Her DBS has currently run out apparently so I do not have any evidence of this yet.

AIBU to still consider employing this person - I don't know if they are still using?

My heart says absolutely no to looking after my kids with any connection to drugs and if they were really young I wouldn't even be considering it, my head says we have all done stuff in the past we may not be proud of and is cocaine really that much worse than getting really really drunk (I genuinely don't know the answer to this)?

Definitely need to get updated DBS, but if that does come back showing the caution - what should I do?

YABU - do not let this person near your children
YANBU - don't rule her out until you know more

OP posts:
TellMeWhere · 12/01/2023 10:42

18 months ago is not a long time ago, at all.

Make sure you have actual facts though, not malicious gossip.

Sleepinatent · 12/01/2023 10:43

Before you rule her out though I would get the DBS or at least ask her about it as you don't actually know this information is true/accurate, at the moment it's just a rumour. If she's got good refs and you like her get the evidence before making the decision.

astronewt · 12/01/2023 10:44

I know it's hard to find a good after-school nanny. I flexed my ideal to find one. And if we were talking 10 to 15 years ago I'd have a different answer. But arrested for coke eighteen months ago? No. Way.

HoppingAndHoping · 12/01/2023 10:44

shewolfsout · 12/01/2023 10:16

She wouldn't be allowed to work with children in an education setting etc. until it's been 6 years and is eligible for filtering, which seems a reasonable amount of time. Eg. A 19 year old gets a caution for drug possession at a rave, she sees it as a wake up call and takes her life in a new direction. By the time she's 25/26 years old she has a young child and wants to start working in the nursery or running a local play group.
That seems fair to me, it gives people the opportunity to take their lives in a different direction and doesn't keep them permanently restricted for a caution, enabling them to participate as full citizens again, but also reflects that it is a serious thing to happen and there does need to be a reasonable time pass before that person can be shown to be consistently rehabilitated from that previous path they were on. There is a balance between giving people a fair chance, and keeping people safe, and I think 6 years is a reasonable amount of time, whereas 18 months is not long enough and a big gamble especially when it comes for your kids.

100% agree

oudie · 12/01/2023 10:44

I wouldn't.

I abhor drugs so wouldn't make the choice to have someone involved in mine or my children's lives knowing they had used them.

MMMarmite · 12/01/2023 10:46

Assuming it's true, it's a no from me. In the distant past, maybe, but 18 months is recent and that was just the time she got caught, it may well still be going on.

IncompleteSenten · 12/01/2023 10:46

18 months since last caught?
No fucking chance.

inloveandmarried · 12/01/2023 10:51

You can't employ her without up to date enhanced DBS. It really isn't safe to do this with someone you don't know implicitly.
You are responsible for protecting your children. They can't do this themselves.

BlueWhippets · 12/01/2023 10:53

Sounds like she just got caught. I wonder how frequent the drug use was. Realistically just because someone has a clean record doesn't mean that they don't or haven't previously used drugs. I know a lot of doctors, nurses, teachers etc who have used drugs or still do use drugs but have just never been caught out.
Can understand why you'd be uncomfortable though and it would make me feel uncomfortable but I know very few people who have never taken any illegal drug at some point in their life. Most people just don't ever get caught

liveforsummer · 12/01/2023 10:55

Historical - possibly. 18 months ago - not a chance!

Original poster
Snuggy75 · 12/01/2023 11:04

inloveandmarried · 12/01/2023 10:51

You can't employ her without up to date enhanced DBS. It really isn't safe to do this with someone you don't know implicitly.
You are responsible for protecting your children. They can't do this themselves.

From what I can understand - the caution will appear on her DBS but does that automatically mean she is not authorised to look after children? Or can you not get a DBS at all if you have a caution? Sorry I am looking all over the internet but can't seem to find the answer.

OP posts:
hollyjollychristmass · 12/01/2023 11:05

Absolutely not. I wouldn't even consider taking the risk when it comes to my children.

babsanderson · 12/01/2023 11:12

Drug use a long time ago I would have no issue with, but this is recent.
I do not use drugs though. I would not be a hypocrite though if you do use drugs.

babsanderson · 12/01/2023 11:14

Snuggy75 · 12/01/2023 11:04

From what I can understand - the caution will appear on her DBS but does that automatically mean she is not authorised to look after children? Or can you not get a DBS at all if you have a caution? Sorry I am looking all over the internet but can't seem to find the answer.

Show quote history

A DBS shows offences. Some are ones that mean the person should not be working with children at all e.g. sexual offence against a child. But others are at the employers discretion. Drug charges would be at an employers discretion. Basically you decide.

Original poster
Snuggy75 · 12/01/2023 11:22

babsanderson · 12/01/2023 11:14

A DBS shows offences. Some are ones that mean the person should not be working with children at all e.g. sexual offence against a child. But others are at the employers discretion. Drug charges would be at an employers discretion. Basically you decide.

Show quote history

Thank you. I have found a list of crimes that mean you automatically cannot work in childcare and it is not on there (only supplying to a child or intent to supply seem to be). I am now wondering whether it would prevent her from getting Ofsted registered, I think I will check that out.

OP posts:
liveforsummer · 12/01/2023 11:24

It may not stop professional registration but I'd be surprised if major employers such as local authorities would hire

Marblessolveeverything · 12/01/2023 11:28

She may have turned herself around - but my children would not be her experiment. I would want at least 3 years or more before I would consider her for older children.

fieldmouse83 · 12/01/2023 11:28

Say that you'll await her updated DBS certificate before proceeding further with the recruitment process, and then it will either arrive showing the conviction or she will keep stalling - in either case you say see you later.

It's irrelevant whether the conviction prevents her working with children- YOU decide. And the answer is no bloody way!!

pushchairprincess · 12/01/2023 11:29

Your gut instincts are right OP - stay well clear

mindutopia · 12/01/2023 11:29

I would give this one a swerve. Personally, I'm not that bothered about drinking or drug use. Dh and I drink (while our kids are in our care and while they aren't) and have used drugs in the past (NOT with children in our care). So I don't think occasional cocaine use makes someone so irresponsible that they couldn't look after a child.

BUT neither of us has ever had any police involvement due to drinking or drug use. She'd be pretty unlucky to use cocaine on the very rare occasion and just on that rare occasion ended up with a caution. My guess is that indicates that it's more regular than you might imagine. But really, if my work relied on a clean DBS, no way would I be doing something to jeopardise that. That's a pretty big risk and I think indicates there is either a bigger problem there or she is someone who is inclined to take silly risks and not think through the very serious consequences they could have - both of which would put me off hiring her to look after my children.

AnnaTortoiseshell · 12/01/2023 11:29

Absolutely no way. She would never get a job in a school or childcare setting.

Usergjdksndjsn · 12/01/2023 11:30

18 months ago is hardly a long time ago, ‘mistakes in the past’ sort of thing is it.
and it’s not just drug use, it’s drug use to the point of a police caution
and suspiciously no DBS

ProserpinaProserpina · 12/01/2023 11:37

I’m not particularly judgemental about stuff like this but it wouldn’t employ someone with such a recent past.

Plenty of people take recreational drugs but not many receive cautions. That’s a red flag for me. What kind of careless or overt behaviour led to this?

babsanderson · 12/01/2023 11:48

liveforsummer · 12/01/2023 11:24

It may not stop professional registration but I'd be surprised if major employers such as local authorities would hire

They will if it was a number of years ago

babsanderson · 12/01/2023 11:49

It is usual as an employer if someone has a caution showing in their DBS to ask about the circumstances.