Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I’m about to be dismissed

258 replies

Firedgirl · 08/01/2023 09:45

I’m in an unusual situation that I know that on Friday next week, I am going to be dismissed. I found out accidentally and they don’t know that I know. Everyone is behaving pretty normally and seems happy. and I’m expected to go in tomorrow and behave normally and get on with my work and hold meetings etc. I’m likely to be dismissed with immediate effect (pay in lieu of notice). I will be removed from the building immediately once they tell me due to security/information etc.

I’ve been at my company for over a year but less than 2 so it’s not really redundancy I guess. Nothing wrong with my work or performance it’s just like redundancy but since I’ve not been there two years I don’t really have those rights. I actually just got a payrise too!

anyone else been in this position? How on earth am I going to behave normally?! Any tips for what I need to ask when they “break the news” to me?

OP posts:
LadyWithLapdog · 08/01/2023 15:41

I’m appalled at the number of people suggesting calling in sick. The OP isn’t sick. She may be upset, understandably, who wouldn’t? But this is life stress, it’s not a sickness. At any rate, the first 7 days are self certified. No need for GP etc.

Goodgrief82 · 08/01/2023 15:44

LadyWithLapdog · 08/01/2023 15:41

I’m appalled at the number of people suggesting calling in sick. The OP isn’t sick. She may be upset, understandably, who wouldn’t? But this is life stress, it’s not a sickness. At any rate, the first 7 days are self certified. No need for GP etc.

Ditto

but thankfully very very little chance of OP getting an appointment in the foreseeable future so hopefully it’s advice with no meat whatsoever

JudgeRudy · 08/01/2023 15:50

Well firstly I'd consider how reliable this information is. If your vpretty confident of your source, I would go into/call work and request an emergency meeting with HR before even starting work. Put your card on the table and ask if it's true. If it is I'd request time off to manage your stress/shock. They're unlikely to say no.......
My preference would be to play it cool. Id be inclined to drop it into a meeting eg "Kathy, I'll make sure I get those figures over to you before Friday as I'm sure you'll be leading"....."I'm not sure John, pointless talking to me about stuff that's happening next month"......or maybe put in a request for some holiday the week after as you're going on a shopping trip with your visiting cousin and hoping to buy a new leather work bag/camera/laptop/scarf (insert your leaving 🎁 here) 🤭

LadyOfTheFliessssss · 08/01/2023 15:51

LadyWithLapdog · 08/01/2023 15:41

I’m appalled at the number of people suggesting calling in sick. The OP isn’t sick. She may be upset, understandably, who wouldn’t? But this is life stress, it’s not a sickness. At any rate, the first 7 days are self certified. No need for GP etc.

My logic for it was fuck them. Not because OP might actually be sick.

You wouldn't catch me doing a shift where I knew I was getting escorted off at the end of it.

Goodgrief82 · 08/01/2023 15:55

LadyOfTheFliessssss · 08/01/2023 15:51

My logic for it was fuck them. Not because OP might actually be sick.

You wouldn't catch me doing a shift where I knew I was getting escorted off at the end of it.

Some compelling reasons why that is shit advice

  1. bad reference
  2. you have broken your contract so no reason to pay you for the week you drop sticks and scarper
  3. burning bridges in the future possibly
  4. who knows who accurate the “accidentally finding out” information is
LadyWithLapdog · 08/01/2023 16:07

It’s only a week and it’s not “personal”. You go in, you do the work you’re still getting paid for. It’s not a 3 month protracted leaving. As PP mentioned, you may need these people or company in the future. We all dream of giving the finger to the job in a grand gesture but, unless you win the Lottery, this isn’t an option.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/01/2023 16:12

Why are you being fired?

If you're being 'let go', then that is redundancy and there are procedures they need to follow. Including consultation period of 3 weeks.

Are you in UK?

Any how did you find out?

lieselotte · 08/01/2023 16:17

Maybe the consultation has happened and the OP has been tipped off that she is one of the unlucky ones. Or they will just pay extra severance to deal with the lack of consultation, P&O style.

Moveoverdarlin · 08/01/2023 16:19

Just behave with professionalism. You have the advantage over everyone else in that you’ve had a heads up. Don’t be rude or burn your bridges. I was made redundant once, with a payout, and 9 months later they asked me back on more money. They’ll remember you if you respond professionally.

lieselotte · 08/01/2023 16:21

Ask if they will be paying you any severance or paying for outplacement. They don't have to, as you have less than two years' service, but that doesn't mean they won't.

RosaMoline · 08/01/2023 16:22

Forgive my ignorance, but is being ‘escorted off the premises’ a usual thing these day? It’s sounds very dramatic, and I would’ve thought it would only apply for gross misconduct or something like that.

ReiRay · 08/01/2023 16:23

Phone in sick

GloomyDarkness · 08/01/2023 16:23

I'd go in - make sure everything personal taken home discretely or with excuse making changes for new year - and then all the information and e-mails contact info you need to somewhere you can access.

Then I'd be polite and helpful to everyone - as you never know when you'll meet them again and you'll want a decent reference.

This is pretty much what DH did and as he has met them later on -he went sideways to his industry and it's helped him.

Not so sure I'd be wrapping everything up though - possibly making sure I looked as good as possible but not beyond that.

At least you have some warning - I have a relative who got none called to a meeting and turned out it was another wave of redundancies and he was escorted off and not allowed back to his desk - I don't think he got everything back either and it really did a number on his mental health as he'd been there decades.

CrunchyCarrot · 08/01/2023 16:24

Stick it out, OP. If there are also others being let go, then be there in solidarity with them even though they don't know yet.

daisychain01 · 08/01/2023 16:26

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 08/01/2023 16:12

Why are you being fired?

If you're being 'let go', then that is redundancy and there are procedures they need to follow. Including consultation period of 3 weeks.

Are you in UK?

Any how did you find out?

Redundancy only applies if the employee has 2 years' service history.

The OP has already stated they have served more than 1 year, but less than 2, which makes them ineligible, so this is just a case of letting them go with payment in lieu of their contractual notice period eg 1 month, 3 months whatever is in their employment contract. Plus payment for any accrued holiday that hasn't yet been taken.

consultation (of 30 days prior to enactment of redundancy) only applies if there will be between 20 and 99 employees affected. We don't have that level of detail but anyway it isn't relevant to the OP as this isn't technically a redundancy.

BucketofTeaMassiveCake · 08/01/2023 16:27

I'd say be professional and continue to do the job to the best of your ability - if the information is correct and they let you go then at least you haven't burned your bridges - who knows, in the future you may be able to return.

Also it should mean a good reference and maybe they'll have good reason to regret losing you, more fool them.

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 08/01/2023 16:28

RosaMoline · 08/01/2023 16:22

Forgive my ignorance, but is being ‘escorted off the premises’ a usual thing these day? It’s sounds very dramatic, and I would’ve thought it would only apply for gross misconduct or something like that.

It used to be in finance because leaving someone you've dismissed with access to sensitive info and details of your customers is an absolute no-no. It used to be that you get them off the premises before they can do any damage or scoop up any company info. No reason why it's not still like that in certain sensitive areas.

RosaMoline · 08/01/2023 16:31

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 08/01/2023 16:28

It used to be in finance because leaving someone you've dismissed with access to sensitive info and details of your customers is an absolute no-no. It used to be that you get them off the premises before they can do any damage or scoop up any company info. No reason why it's not still like that in certain sensitive areas.

Thank you for the clarification. That makes sense.

Runningfire · 08/01/2023 16:54

Get to doctors and get signed off with stress for a few months…..

Adelant · 08/01/2023 16:59

Theluggage15 · 08/01/2023 11:15

Please don’t do this. What a fucking stupid suggestion.

Why is it stupid? I know many people who do this. They’ve done the work so why can’t they save it?

IAmAlreadyRegrettingMyGreyColourScheme · 08/01/2023 17:01

Many years ago I worked for a company who often did this. If an employees contract was not renewed they'd be escorted off the premises due to sensitive information being available.
In theory it was understandable but in practice it was slightly humiliating for the person leaving. When it was my turn I asked to leave slightly early for an appointment so I avoided the escort!
I hope it goes OK OP however you chose to handle it.

Adelant · 08/01/2023 17:02

I think I would go in Monday and Tuesday and start complaining of a scratchy throat / headache. And then call in sick Wednesday and never go in again.

WinterFoxes · 08/01/2023 17:07

Don't call in sick. That could affect your references - number of sick days are one of the things employers share most frequently. You are getting pay in lieu of notice, so you can use that time to look for other work.

Either tell them you know in a calm, professional manner or go in but do the minimum. There's a chance your information source is wrong, so you dont want to do anything stupid. Do work to rule, though. Take full lunch hours and leave on time etc.

I agree with PP that you should get advice from ACAS.

PigletJohn · 08/01/2023 17:10

Spend your time going through your desk for personal belongings or private papers. There might be things you want to tidy up. Avoid extra commitments and say you'll discuss it next week.

Don't email work stuff to your home account as it can be seen.

Leave promptly at the end of whatever nominal working day is, and take a lunch break. If asked say you're feeling a bit under the weather.

MumUndone · 08/01/2023 17:14

Feelallright · 08/01/2023 10:07

You’re going to get a load of irrelevant replies because of your thread title and opening post. You are not being dismissed. You think your job is going to be made redundant. That’s different.

No it's not. Redundancy is a type of dismissal from a legal perspective, we just tend not to refer to it as such.

Swipe left for the next trending thread