To give a cash reward to the twin who gets the best GCSE results?

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DS and DD are both in year 11 so have their GCSEs coming up shortly. Both are bright and of very similar if not identical academic ability and are predicted very similar grades.

Both are relatively hard working (although with a tendency to coast) but DH and I would really like them to knuckle down and push themselves to get the best grades possible.

We therefore came up with the idea of an effort-based reward scheme allowing them to earn treats for completing revision- e.g. 75 hours= a meal out, 150 hours= a night away etc.

However, both twins have suggested that instead, the twin who gets the best results should receive the whole cash reward. They are both competitive with each other and have said this would give them greater incentive to work harder.

My concern is that the twin who doesn't do as well will be doubly disappointed on results day as they will also get no reward. Should I go with the twins' suggestion?

It is worth saying that they are both predicted all 8s and 9s however a number of teachers have commented that they have a tendency to coast rather than push themselves to work as hard as they can.

Thanks for all the comments- you've confirmed my concerns about this plan. Instead, we're going to go with a reward for both effort and results. We will do a set cash reward for each 9,8 or 7 grade. The DC have actually asked that they pay us money for any grade they get below this as an extra motivation! We will also do an additional reward for hours of revision completed so there is an incentive for effort too.

I appreciate that revising for long hours does not automatically mean high quality revision. However, in my view, a combination of quality and quantity is most effective and there is undeniably a link between DC who revise the most and get the best results.

Please read my comment

Do not do this. I cannot stress that enough.

i was a massive perfectionist throughout school- straight As, 100% in mocks, studied for 12+ hours a day, barely slept, I was encouraged by the fact I was getting good grades and making everyone happy (they had no idea how miserable I was). The better my grades, the happier everyone was, and the worse I treated myself.

I took an overdose at 17, ended up burnt out and exhausted and did shit in my final exams. I could have been anything I wanted result and brain wise, but I couldn’t because I had completely decayed as a person. It’s only now - a decade later - that I’m able to study and actually work without feeling like an utter failure for not getting 100%

You reward them for effort. If you start giving money for grades you’re saying that one is more worthy and better than the other. Do not do that. It’s a very slippery slope and you do not want to encourage perfectionism. Don’t equate good grades with being the end all and be all

My son got mostly nines I said well done and gave him a hug. 🤷‍♀️

Awful. Awful to pay them to revise too. It's up to them. If they get good results, by ll means reward with cash if you wish.

Great post!

I'd play the long game and aim for a healthier family dynamic. A lifetime of comparing yourself to your twin sounds shit. You know, if they worked together on revision rather than in competition with each other they may both do well.

I'm a twin. Even in my 40s I'm massively competitive with my twin about almost everything, even really stupid stuff.
But I don't think its a great idea

Both suggestions are awful.

You should absolutely not put them in competition with each other. For one, getting a 5 in a subject might be a better achievement than the other getting a 7.

I don't know how you measure effort. Staring at a book for 10 hours is not more useful than 30 minutes of detailed focussed revision. Sometimes taking a break is more valuable than slogging on regardless.

This reminds me of the school reading "incentive" in Year 2, where you got a point every time you read a book and points translated into better and better prizes. Guess how many children opted to read lots of short easy books as they realised it was valued above reading a smaller number of longer more challenging books.

The reward for hard work is getting better grades, surely?

Better to reward against hitting targets in their GCSEs?

I do have to say I don't agree with the idea that any rewards for achievement are bad. In my view, GCSE grades are inherently linked to effort and hard work.

Obviously any reward should be linked to the ability of the DC. If a DC is capable of a 9, that should be what is expected and rewarded. On the other hand, if a 5 is a great achievement, they should be rewarded for that.

@ILoveeCakes They do not have the same genetics! They are no closer genetically than any other siblings - and siblings don't necessarily have the same abilities.

As a twin, please reward them both for effort and don't encourage competition between them.

Let them coast. Let them deal with the consequences. It won't ruin them.

Exactly ,my son is in year 11_and doing his best ,if he gets a few fours I will be delighted ,but as long as he does the best he can that's all.he can do.

I also should have said- by rewarding for effort I don’t mean by hours put in, or how often they studied. I studied for 12+ hours on top of school- but I barely slept, lost a lot of friends and barely had time to do anything else. My entire life was waking up, studying before school, going to school, studying after school, studying over dinner, studying after dinner, pretending to sleep and studying some more. I was miserable as a person and just because I was studying a lot doesn’t mean I was doing a good job. The actual amount of studying doesn’t equate to effort

only you will know how much effort they’ve put in. Yeah, they’ll have to sacrifice things and occasionally miss parties and social things and that’s ok, but don’t rely on things like how long and often they study for as that’s meaningless and again a bit of a slippery slope

It really scares me as a parent that this is they way things are going. My children are years away from doing exams but the thought that parents are going to start paying them for their efforts and results is just mind boggling! I will be there to support, listen, advise and help them revise and try and achieve their very best, but it will be out of love, not for a financial reward. Back in my day you got a hug and told well done if you passed.

@wincarwoo

That's definitely not an option! We want to encourage the DC to try their hardest at everything they do and coasting won't be accepted.

Pitting your kids against each other is never, ever going to be a good idea. Why the fuck would you even entertain it?

Absolutely hate the idea of cash rewards for exam success. Know loads of people who do it here for JC and LC exams (Ireland). At some point our children have to learn the concept of intrinsic motivation (some are born with it) and rewarding their successes in life literally robs them of this. This is even more true for the more unmotivated child.
Their exam results are for them, for their futures and successes not ours.

This is a hill I'm prepared to die on + not boasting but ds1 just got 613 points (out of 625) in LC 2022!

Terrible idea
Poor twin that gives it their all and gets nothing

I hope you don't helicopter them all their lives.

Just because a DC is capable of getting a 9 doesn't meant that this should be expected. That just puts huge pressure on them. Maybe they should choose to focus their attention in a weaker subject and "only* get a 7. Maybe they should work at a more relaxed pace and not get super stressed. Maybe doing "well enough" actually is "good enough".

It's the huge pressure on getting amazing grades that is one of the contributors to mental health problems in teens today.

Both ideas are terrible. Just really awful. Pitting siblings against each other for cash rewards is particularly grim though.

One of my Y11 students who came to this country as an unaccompanied Asylum seeker was talking about this sort of thing recently. He was appalled to find out that some of his friends are getting cash bribes from their parents to revise for their exams, show up to afterschool revision sessions or achieve decent grades. He sees education as a privilege and can't believe his peers are so entitled that they have to be bribed to make an effort.

Absolute crap! I have twins, one is very clever academically, the other is incredibly artistic and creative. The academic one got good exam results in comparison to their sibling but the artistic one worked 1000x as hard to get their average results.
I was so proud of the one with lower grades and (privately) disappointed in the one with higher grades.

On another note, I think awarding kids more money for higher grades is absolutely disgusting and makes kids ill with worry.

What you're actually doing is encouraging them to win the most money. As long as you realise that I suppose.

Hard no.