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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask which Bennett sister you are?

147 replies

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 22:58

I hate to say it but when I was 18 I would have been a total Lydia. Thought myself excellent, liked to party and get attention from boys. I’d definitely have done something fucking stupid like run away with a handsome but twattish commander who didn’t know when to put his little solider away.

These days I’m far more Lizzie. A bit cynical, attracted to men with nice houses and like a to wind up arrogant obnoxious men.

Could never be a Jane. I’m not nearly nice enough Grin

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Needhelp101 · 04/01/2023 23:30

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:29

I feel like I could write a book about what a total nobber Mr Bennet is. Marries a stupid woman because she’s pretty, sits about doing fuck all about the fact that his DD’s and wife will end up destitute when he dies, shits himself in his study and doesn’t check his daughters when they make total tits of themselves thus ruining the marriage prospects of his lovely older daughter who is very deserving of love.

I did read a parody version of 50shades/P&P once called 50 Shades of Mr Darcy where Mr Bennet “ retired to his study and waited for the television to be invented”. There’s also a part where “Lizzie coloured” (taking the piss out of the over use of ‘coloured’ to mean the woman in 50 shades was blushing) and Mr Darcy said “For goodness sake will you put the crayons away” 😂😂

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🤣🤣🤣🤣

Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:31

FortunaMajor · 04/01/2023 23:28

I loved The Other Bennet Sister.

There's also Charlotte by Helen Moffett which tells the story from Charlotte Lucas's perspective.

Mrs Wickham by Sarah Page (on Audible) is really good fun.

I wasn't that keen on Longbourn by Jo Baker, which tells it from the servant's perspective, but I know others really rate it.

Haven’t read Longbourn as I heard it was depressing. Hated Death Comes to Pemberley. The TV version was ok though.

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Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:32

I should have said Mr Bennet ‘SHUTS himself in his study’, not shits. Although you ever know, the toilet facilities weren’t much to be desired in those days.

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Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:32

BrightYellowDaffodil · 04/01/2023 23:27

Was Mr Collins really that bad though?

Oh, he was. All those carefully studied graces, his piety and his obsequious veneration of anyone above him in the social pecking order, not to mention being a crashing bore who was completely indifferent to the notion of Elizabeth not wanting to marry him.

But I quite agree with a@hopelessbusiness that Charlotte played a duff hand very well.

As for me, I’m a hefty dollop of Lizzie. Too much time spent getting my hems dirty in muddy puddles Grin

Yeah, he’s a bit embarrassing and quite socially inept. But to me he was really no worse than someone like Henry Tilney or indeed Mr Bennet. He wasn’t cruel or unkind. A bit class obsessed, but that could be applied to literally everyone in Austen land! I don’t think he’d ever actively upset or annoy Charlotte - she could basically just live a life as the mistress of her own little house.

Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:33

What’s wrong with Henry Tilney?! He’s lovely!

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Needhelp101 · 04/01/2023 23:33

It sounds ridiculous, but the film of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is a hoot.

Bubbleteahoe · 04/01/2023 23:33

I've been reliably informed by a Buzz feed quiz that I completed 5 seconds ago, that I am most like Jane!

Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:34

@Bubbleteahoe ooh link please!

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Deadringer · 04/01/2023 23:35

I would like to be Lizzy, but I am probably more of a Kitty. No way am I Mary, dull, pedantic, conceited and sanctimonious, and even if I was I wouldn't admit it.
Charlotte wasn't really too old to find a husband at 27, if she was rich and pretty her age wouldn't have been an issue. Elizabeth Elliott wasn't short of admirers, and she was close to 30.

CarPoor · 04/01/2023 23:36

As a teenager I could easily have been seduced by Mr Wickham. But I wasn't as vain as Lydia so maybe a bit more Kittie.

As an adult I'm much more Lizzie, with perhaps a hint of Charlotte. Tbf possibly more Mr Darcy than anyone.

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:36

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:33

What’s wrong with Henry Tilney?! He’s lovely!

I fucking hate Henry Tilney. When I did my Jane Austen module I had to entirely avoid writing on NA because I wasn’t confident I could write about him in an unbiased fashion. I’ve always hated him, I had like a visceral reaction to his snotty patronising attitude. I actually think the hero of that novel is John Thorpe, because it’s his bizarre unpleasantness that shows Henry in a much better light than he deserves.

I did have a big soft spot for Willoughby in S&S though… so maybe it’s the Lydia in me looking for the bad boy and rejecting the safe option!

Bubbleteahoe · 04/01/2023 23:37

www.buzzfeed.com/phoebeodonnell11/what-bennet-sister-are-you-from-pride-and-prejudic-901aowzjgt

I hope this link works! And can I just say, your user name wins @LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet 🏆

LadyIsabellaWrotham · 04/01/2023 23:37

CherrySocks · 04/01/2023 23:06

Mrs Bennet didn't have sex before marriage or run off unmarried with a man, as far as we know, even if she was as silly as Lydia about officers in redcoats.

I suspect that the credit for that goes to her parents, the Gardiners, who would have kept her on a tight leash in the way that Mr and Mrs B so signally failed to do with Lydia, and not allowed her the opportunity to compromise herself more seriously than silly flirtations with any man in scarlet. Grandpa Gardiner was a lawyer and probably had his head screwed on

I see myself as a Lizzy, clever and lively but not always the kindest, and with occasional honking great errors of judgement.

GetThatHelmetOn · 04/01/2023 23:37

I was Mary, turned into Lizzie in my late 20s and now I am evolving into Jane. Not for the looks though…

Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:41

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:36

I fucking hate Henry Tilney. When I did my Jane Austen module I had to entirely avoid writing on NA because I wasn’t confident I could write about him in an unbiased fashion. I’ve always hated him, I had like a visceral reaction to his snotty patronising attitude. I actually think the hero of that novel is John Thorpe, because it’s his bizarre unpleasantness that shows Henry in a much better light than he deserves.

I did have a big soft spot for Willoughby in S&S though… so maybe it’s the Lydia in me looking for the bad boy and rejecting the safe option!

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I’m a Willoughby fan too. He was in an impossible situation and he did love Marianne so couldn’t marry for as they’d be even more impoverished than before.

I also love Greg Wise as Willoughby. He is just the perfect man to play him! If only I could bleach my brain from the other adaptation a few years ago that had Dominic Cooper playing him

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Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:42

Bubbleteahoe · 04/01/2023 23:37

www.buzzfeed.com/phoebeodonnell11/what-bennet-sister-are-you-from-pride-and-prejudic-901aowzjgt

I hope this link works! And can I just say, your user name wins @LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet 🏆

Thank you! Apparently I’m Lizzie. I bet it never tells anyone they’re a Mary

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PerkingFaintly · 04/01/2023 23:46

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:32

Yeah, he’s a bit embarrassing and quite socially inept. But to me he was really no worse than someone like Henry Tilney or indeed Mr Bennet. He wasn’t cruel or unkind. A bit class obsessed, but that could be applied to literally everyone in Austen land! I don’t think he’d ever actively upset or annoy Charlotte - she could basically just live a life as the mistress of her own little house.

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Mr Collins wrote to Longbourn to crow when he heard about Lydia running off.

He said her death would have been a blessing in comparison, advised them to sever all connection and leave her to her fate, and mused in his letter about whether she was naturally bad or whether they were just shit parents.

Cruel and unkind are exactly what he is.

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:46

I never saw that version with Dominic Cooper. I often find I’m not keen on the movie adaptations of books I know well - I’m too picky!

But yes, I just thought Willoughby was so well written. S&S was the first Jane Austen I really ‘got.’ I had always struggled with them before. And I think it was that writing of Marianne meeting the perfect boy and their whirlwind romance followed by the crashing awfulness of it going wrong that drew me in.

PerkingFaintly · 04/01/2023 23:47

I'd love to be a Lizzie, but alas have a fair dollop of Mary.

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:48

PerkingFaintly · 04/01/2023 23:46

Mr Collins wrote to Longbourn to crow when he heard about Lydia running off.

He said her death would have been a blessing in comparison, advised them to sever all connection and leave her to her fate, and mused in his letter about whether she was naturally bad or whether they were just shit parents.

Cruel and unkind are exactly what he is.

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I guess we’ll have to disagree. I don’t really see him as inherently worse than Mr Bennet. He was socially inappropriate and a bit smug, but I still think he (in those times) was a sensible choice for a husband for Charlotte.

And to be honest I don’t disagree with his musings about them being shit parents - they sort of were!

IReallyLikeCrows · 04/01/2023 23:49

That stupid quiz told me I'm a Lydia so it can bloody do one! Then again I was probably a bit of a Lydia when I was younger but more intelligent so enough Lizzie to stop me from being a total disaster. Plus, we could sleep around and not be ruined so that helped.

These days I think I'm a little Lizzie, sharp-tongued and quite witty, a little Jane because sometimes I'm very kind - when I'm not being sharp-tongued - and a bit of Mary too because I do like to get lost in a book.

I went in search of The Other Bennet Sister and discovered that I'd bought it on Kindle. It must have been a 99p offer at some point last year. It's now on my list of "FFS, get around to reading it you arsehole."

Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:50

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:46

I never saw that version with Dominic Cooper. I often find I’m not keen on the movie adaptations of books I know well - I’m too picky!

But yes, I just thought Willoughby was so well written. S&S was the first Jane Austen I really ‘got.’ I had always struggled with them before. And I think it was that writing of Marianne meeting the perfect boy and their whirlwind romance followed by the crashing awfulness of it going wrong that drew me in.

Yes it speaks to women so well.

It’s almost like Austen knew her books would stand the test of time they were written in such a way. When you read about how actually commercially unsuccessful she was at the time and, in her later years, something of an impoverished nomad due to circumstances not dissimilar to her heroines, it’s hard to believe the impact she continues to make 200 years later

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IReallyLikeCrows · 04/01/2023 23:50

Also, great thread, thank you and an even better username!

Deadringer · 04/01/2023 23:51

It's true that Collins was cruel about Lydia's predicament, but he was expressing a view that was the norm for society at the time, (and probably parroting dear old Lady Catherine) he didn't have an original thought in his head.

Original poster
LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 04/01/2023 23:52

Kanaloa · 04/01/2023 23:48

I guess we’ll have to disagree. I don’t really see him as inherently worse than Mr Bennet. He was socially inappropriate and a bit smug, but I still think he (in those times) was a sensible choice for a husband for Charlotte.

And to be honest I don’t disagree with his musings about them being shit parents - they sort of were!

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If you look at it through an early 19th century lens, Lydia came VERY close to destroying marriage prospects for her sisters. That’s how it worked then - whole families would be tarred with the brush of such a scandal. Meaning if none of them married men there’d be six poor homeless women after Mr B died. I think Collins was mostly using this to rub it in because he was welcomed into his future home with revulsion and sneers

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