Scrabble, jizz and my mother

[PotteringPondering]

I spent New Year with my elderly mother. She's a huge Scrabble fan, and we played several games.

In one game I realised I could get the highest score I've ever got for a word. It would blitz the game, and triumphantly crown all my years of Scrabble playing. It included two Zs (one from a blank), and a triple word score.

But the word was JIZZ. I realised I couldn't face the ensuing conversation with my mother, so it went unplayed.

Was I unreasonable to forego the most euphoric Scrabble moment ever, because I wouldn't explain jizz to my mother?

Here you go. Safe Scrabbling to you.

How good are you at scrabble if you can't even read an opening post?

Read the OP, fill in the BLANKS

Loving all these innocents who think that elderly women won't know the word.

Ha! I had to do the same, but to a local young bloke in an African village, where for some reason, the only board game available in the lodge bar was CAH!

They had a shag on Pointless yesterday.

How smart are you if you can’t even read the full thread? Works both ways smart arse.

As a sometime birdwatcher, I'd heard that it's a phonetic version of "Giss" (General Impression of Size and Shape).

Reminds me of during the first lockdown. Ma rang and said "Just watching this comedian and he is very funny but, whats teabagging?"

Bear in mind that my mother was 73 at the time, and I know for a fact didnt have any "try before you buy" with my father, so her experience is (or so I thought) somewhat vanilla. So I explained it in as factual a way as possible. Her reaction? "Oh is that all?!"

I think I ended up more shocked than her

I rang my sister straight away and she was as gobsmacked at our (normally very prudish and puritanical) mother's total non reaction!

A few days later it occurred to me that she knew it was rude and rang me and I asked her why and why she didnt just google it. She said that she didnt want that on their internet searches and that she was sure I would know.....so I was both shocked AND insulted!

Are you not howling or spitting out your tea? This definitely happened.

Hmmmm... a head scratcher OP. Technically is Jizz a slang word though? Is it in the dictionary, and if not should you be using it? Just to give you some closure 😂

www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/jizz

Such filth from Scrabble, it's wonderful.

Thanks for voting and for all your messages. Much appreciated.

My main conclusion so far: lots of you clearly have conversations with your mothers that I could never begin to contemplate.

They had a shag on Pointless yesterday.

There was an edition of Tenable where they also had a bird-related question - asking for the most common kinds of tits and thrushes in the UK (or something like that). Warwick just kept completely losing it - especially when somebody said 'bearded tit' and the camera panned to a contestant with impressively luxuriant facial hair!

I’m 71 and have never heard of the word jizz until just now! Have I led a very sheltered life?

@Persuasion14 Another one here in awe of your punning!

I'm Irish, 63yoa and I remember that in my teens a person who was lively and fun would sometimes be said to be jizzy, or even full of jizz! Also sometimes applied to a fancy item such as a nippy little car.

I was maybe 20 when I discovered the "alternative" meaning. I used the word recently to describe a fancy car, the look on my adult son's face was priceless. I admit, I feigned complete ignorance of any alternative meaning.

I'm Irish, 63yoa and I remember that in my teens a person who was lively and fun would sometimes be said to be jizzy, or even full of jizz! Also sometimes applied to a fancy item such as a nippy little car.

"Did you advertise our Honda Jizz on Autotrader, Herbert - now that we've both decided to give up driving?"
"Yes, Beryl, the advert was published yesterday."
"Have we had any people call about it yet, Herbert?"
"Yes, Beryl - I've had 327 calls from people mentioning the advert."
"Fantastic, Herbert, I'm so glad that there's such a lot of interest in buying the car, now that we don't need it anymore - we're sure to get a good price for it."
"Oh, none of them was actually interested in buying the car, Beryl...."

bought mum one of those bats that electocute flies only to hear her keep repeating she had just twatted another fly, we were falling about laughing.loving this post.

Loving your responses. All that Irish jizz is quite a revelation.

To all the people pointing out that my mother was young in the 1960s, so she must be more knowledgeable in sexual slang than I give her credit for... er, no.

I’m 71 and just can’t work out how I have managed all these years until I read this post the other day to have never heard of the word! Is there only me?

I think you should have played the word! My mum is very elderly, she has always been shy but she will put any word down to get her the most scrabble points and does so with a giggle and it's me who blushes. She also said 'No' when staff in her sheltered accommodation asked if residents wanted a film turning off because of 'Scenes of a sexual nature' . Elderly women should never be underestimated!