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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shocked at how my friend responded to her daughter?

147 replies

dorindasinger · 31/12/2022 15:09

Was over visiting my friend today as I hadn't seen her since October. Was having a nice visit and her 9 year old daughter was telling me about the gifts she got. She then came down the stairs with a massive, oversized teddy she got. I said, 'oh wow, he's big, what's his name?' To which her daughter replied, 'non binary'.

My friend then laughed and said, 'where did you hear that?' The daughter replied saying she didn't know. Her mum then replied, 'well don't be silly, that's not a real thing', her daughter replied, 'some people are non binary', and mum responded, 'I know but it's still silly and it's still made up'. And that was that.

I didn't say anything, but was quite taken aback. Regardless of opinions and thoughts on the whole gender thing, surely we should be teaching our children to respect it. I would be worried now that she goes to school voicing those opinions too. For instance, 'my mum said non binary is silly and not real'. That wouldn't be great.

AIBU?

OP posts:
ofwarren · 31/12/2022 15:29

Did they look like this OP?
But bigger, obviously

To be shocked at how my friend responded to her daughter?
pigonalipstick · 31/12/2022 15:30

Oh right, never heard of that myself. It's a shame everyone on Mumsnet is so distrustful. I see this stuff a lot on mumnset where a pile on and nastiness takes place. Why even comment then? Just report and leave it up to MNHQ to determine if I'm real or not?

Will do!

SlashBeef · 31/12/2022 15:30

ofwarren · 31/12/2022 15:19

You reckon? Grin

Show quote history

Beautiful! Mx C Reckon

Original poster
dorindasinger · 31/12/2022 15:30

EarringsandLipstick · 31/12/2022 15:28

Yet another one of these threads. OP go & sit by the fire & have a relaxing NYE instead of posting this goady nonsense.

We're not that stupid 🙄

It would appear that you are as I'm not whatever or whoever you are accusing me of being. Hey ho can't argue with stupid so won't bother.

OP posts:
Highlyflavouredgravy · 31/12/2022 15:31

dorindasinger · 31/12/2022 15:26

Oh right, never heard of that myself. It's a shame everyone on Mumsnet is so distrustful. I see this stuff a lot on mumnset where a pile on and nastiness takes place. Why even comment then? Just report and leave it up to MNHQ to determine if I'm real or not?

Show quote history

I haven't seen any nastiness.

DuplicateUserName · 31/12/2022 15:32

FOJN · 31/12/2022 15:28

It would obviously be 'they're big'

How many bears were there?

3 (of varying sizes) and one blonde girl who likes to steal porridge.

ofwarren · 31/12/2022 15:32

They could always use neopronouns, like bear/bearself Bear

GCAcademic · 31/12/2022 15:32

It’s lovely to see how progressive children are now. I was so inspired recently to see my niece playing with her dolls (which, fyi, is how I know she’s my niece and not my nephew) and telling one of them to “die in a grease fire, TERF bitch!”. This generation is so much more open-minded than their parents.

Gunner1510 · 31/12/2022 15:33

Did your friend put the huge teddy in the bin

VickyEadieofThigh · 31/12/2022 15:33

We got to bingo with the deployment of the word 'bigot' pretty fast, mind.

brusselspout · 31/12/2022 15:33

But.... the kid is stupid because non-binary isn't actually a name. Gosh I'd be embarrassed by such an idiotic child

Highlyflavouredgravy · 31/12/2022 15:33

GCAcademic · 31/12/2022 15:32

It’s lovely to see how progressive children are now. I was so inspired recently to see my niece playing with her dolls (which, fyi, is how I know she’s my niece and not my nephew) and telling one of them to “die in a grease fire, TERF bitch!”. This generation is so much more open-minded than their parents.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

jays · 31/12/2022 15:34

😂 ii say this all the time and I read it in the voice!

Millytante · 31/12/2022 15:34

GCAcademic · 31/12/2022 15:32

It’s lovely to see how progressive children are now. I was so inspired recently to see my niece playing with her dolls (which, fyi, is how I know she’s my niece and not my nephew) and telling one of them to “die in a grease fire, TERF bitch!”. This generation is so much more open-minded than their parents.

🤣🧙🏼‍♀️🧹✊🏼

PaterPower · 31/12/2022 15:34

They could always use neopronouns, like bear/bearself

growl/growlself?
fur/fur-real?

Original poster
dorindasinger · 31/12/2022 15:34

brusselspout · 31/12/2022 15:33

But.... the kid is stupid because non-binary isn't actually a name. Gosh I'd be embarrassed by such an idiotic child

You're lovely.

OP posts:
MarysGirlChildWasLate4ChristmasDay · 31/12/2022 15:35

This is bearly plausible.

The faux naivety is unbearable.

The screenshot cupboard is still bear.

SolitaryMind · 31/12/2022 15:36

Gunner1510 · 31/12/2022 15:33

Did your friend put the huge teddy in the bin

I’d put my bairn in the bin

DuplicateUserName · 31/12/2022 15:36

dorindasinger · 31/12/2022 15:30

It would appear that you are as I'm not whatever or whoever you are accusing me of being. Hey ho can't argue with stupid so won't bother.

Show quote history

That's a bear-faced lie.

LeavesOnTrees · 31/12/2022 15:36

I'd say 'shocked' is a bit of an overreaction.
Children come out with all sorts of random things.

ofwarren · 31/12/2022 15:37

MarysGirlChildWasLate4ChristmasDay · 31/12/2022 15:35

This is bearly plausible.

The faux naivety is unbearable.

The screenshot cupboard is still bear.

Exactly
No such thing as non bearnary

MarysGirlChildWasLate4ChristmasDay · 31/12/2022 15:37

DuplicateUserName · 31/12/2022 15:36

That's a bear-faced lie.

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🤣

Hawkins001 · 31/12/2022 15:37

as I understand the science, genetically you are male or female, then psychologically wise, people choose what to identify as.

But if a car decides it wants to identify as a motorcycle then fair enough, but at its core it is still a car until it's had its parts changed?

Millytante · 31/12/2022 15:38

SolitaryMind · 31/12/2022 15:36

I’d put my bairn in the bin

Show quote history

👏🏼😹

TheMightyOak · 31/12/2022 15:38

Ok it's time for this...

To be shocked at how my friend responded to her daughter?