To HATE phone calls

[PolarBlair]

Family member just phoned me. I missed the call. I phoned back. They missed my call. They phoned back. I picked up. They couldn't hear me. Cue "can you hear me? Hello? Hello? Are you there?"
Me "yes. I can hear you. Yes I can hear you. Yes I can hear you".
They hung up. Tried again. They could hear me.
Told me they'd see me at X time tomorrow. That was all.

I find that so stressful. My blood pressure hasn't come down. I'm actually tense

That could have been a text. JUST SEND ME A TEXT. "See you tomorrow at 2"

Yabu: OP you are so grumpy
yanbu: indeed a text would have sufficed

I think I love you 😂

I used to hate making phone calls in the office. Being overheard and listened to gave me so much anxiety. Now I work from home and I'd rather make a phone call than send an email any day!

I hate them too. Because my phone is on silent- and I’m normally busy - working, driving etc then I will always miss the call. Then the pressure is on me to call back which I procrastinate/ forget and it becomes a massive thing. Hate it.

I just don’t have time for a 5-10 min call when a quick text will suffice.

The only person I speak to on the phone is my Mum.

I do everything by email as I have audio processing disorder. I cannot abide phone calls. With an email I can reply at a time that suits me, keep a record of all information exchanged (appointment times and dates etc) and not have to panic about not being able to hear someone.

😄

This!

Phone calls are such an unsatisfactory and outdated way to communicate. They had their day in the Sun and now they are over. There are so many better options than a phone call.

But you see it wasn't just a phone call. It was 4 rounds of phone tag and two rounds of can you hear me now. For a 5 word message.

So you're absolutely fine with a phone call that functions ok, where there are no missed calls and people can hear each other then? Doesn't sound like it from your other posts.

I’m not keen on phone calls either and I’m another who used to spend hours on the phone as a teen!
The only people I call now are my mum (usually a quick call), MIL (she’s not great with tech) and my clinical supervisor (plannned work calls)

Most phone calls feel a bit…intrusive now. Maybe now that we have alternative and more efficient means of contact

Haha I'm with you OP. While I'm not like the average mumsnetter who refuses to answer the phone, it's phone calls with people that I know (who like a phone call) that I find stressful. The others are done in 30 seconds.

I have a friend who calls the second I send a message. He views it as an invitation to call. On the odd occasion that I answer, we talk for an hour before I try to get off the call (to get on with other things, I can't multitask) and he just starts a new story.

I find phone calls draining and I have to stop what I'm doing to focus.

See also: voice notes. I have a friend who communicates mostly in voice notes and it gives me the rage. No I don't have time to listen to your 5 minute message if you walking around and unlocking doors and sighing with maybe 10 seconds of pertinent information. That could have been a message.

Also, for me, phone calls over the past few years have often brought bad news, so I wonder whether this has something to do with it - an anxiety response

These include notices of family deaths and being called into hospital when Dad was dying and more recently, into ITU when mum was v poorly (thankfully she’s now ok)

How old are you? I think this could be millennial thing. I'm 34 and bloody hates phone calls, especially unexpected ones. Just send me a message!

I chose my hairdresser on the basis I can book online and would never order a takeaway from somewhere that doesn't take online orders.

I can't see how that's stressful tbh, especially if it's someone you know and are seeing soon anyway, so not like you were worried about what they were going to say? I can't see how that's more stressful than seeing the person face to face. I don't have any anxiety around social situations though. I'd be happy if a friend phoned out of the blue, though we usually prearrange phone calls now.

You are so not being unreasonable.

I hate the bloody phone. Face to face I am amazing 😀. On the phone, I talk over the other person, or leave too long a gap to speak, everything is so awkward. Really really awkward. Thank the lord for texting.

I am not a speaking in the phone fan.

It’s just talking to someone. Just talking. There are so many strung-out odd-bods on this site.

And a lot of weird dislike of anyone a bit different - why do you and others have to assert your perceived superiority over something that in the end is quite trivial?

We're going to lose the ability to communicate with anyone other than by messaging at this rate . I find messaging annoying when you're trying to plan things - ping pong back and forth when a quick phone call would sort it.

Yes, i schedule a time to have a phone call so that I can give it all of my time. When I just come home from a long day of work I just want to lie in bed and watch mindless stuff on TV, I need to be prepared to have a long chat!

Fellow millennial phone-call-hater here! 🙋🏽‍♀️

Answering calls is my job. And making them (local government). I love nothing more than an irate person calling and i will be super fake and nice to them.

i answer calls at home like im in the office

I really can't be bothered with messaging back and forth. A quick phone chat is vastly more efficient.

I actually love talking on the phone but I absolutely hate making phone calls. So if people call me I'm fine but if I have to call someone it stirs up some anxiety in me for some reason.

God, the amount of people saying they hate talking on the telephone fills me with utter despair. Let's all just communicate via text and social media instead of, you know, actually engaging with another human being.

I mean I spend a lot of my time chatting to my friends in person! I just don’t want to talk on the phone. Especially if it’s arranging something that can be done very quickly over a text. MIL used to spend half an hour chatting to us on the phone when we were seeing her that evening.

I really don’t think my powers of communication have suffered. I’m very sociable (in person!)

So just don't answer the phone!
What's the issue?

Because I knew it was about timing for tomorrow so they would be trying again. Or waiting for me to call so there's pressure to just do it. I would have liked to send a message saying "yes? You called?" But that might be taken as a slight