AIBU to think she’s lying?

[TS45]

I have always been very close with my best friend. We went to primary and high school together, we shared uni accommodation together and studied the same course together. She’s incredibly sweet and smart, and I couldn’t imagine life without her. And that’s why I’m struggling a lot now.

Around 6 years ago, she had a simple operation she paid privately for. Whilst the operation went well, she ended up with slight nerve damage in her upper thigh. This hasn’t affected her in any way. She’s still able to work, drive, and walk. She occasionally complains of pain but this doesn’t impact her mobility in any way. Within the last three years, she has informed me that she has sued the hospital and will be receiving millions in compensation. She has been awaiting payment for the full three years which she states will be in her account ‘any time now’ .When I questioned the amount being won by her, she exclaimed that it is to cover loss of earnings. She works as a cashier in a supermarket and only took 2 weeks off for the duration. She also has not had any additional treatments, ramps, special cars, etc. She continues to live normally with zero adjustments ever having been needed.

She has begun spending excessive amounts on credit cards and always states her ‘compo will cover it’, despite it never arriving. I’m getting very concerned about her. She is thousands in debt and shows zero anxiety as she claims she’s days away from becoming a multi-millionaire anyway, despite saying this for years. I believe her behaviour is becoming reckless. Her house is currently on the market ready for when she can purchase her mansion.

I want to seek help for her but I don’t know whether she is being truthful about the amount being won or not. If she is being truthful then I risk our friendship. If she’s not being truthful, she’s going to be in very serious financial trouble. Has anyone ever won compensation before or knows anything about it to give me some insights?

Thank you

For goodness sake, this is a good friend walking into disaster. OP is perfectly entitled to be concerned.

I'd be worried too OP, if she was my friend. Worrying about something like bi polar, and is she having manic episodes

He is elderly and it was realistically getting to the stage that he wouldn't live to see a settlement if it dragged on much longer. He is happy with the figure (and still has his foot(!)), the stress of the claim, having to travel for assessments and meetings etc was having a negative effect on his health and that of his partner. There was a point at which this was the best decision for him, I've no doubt that the insurance company were playing the long game. Obviously I don't want to say too much, as it is potentially outing.

Your friend is either lying, she's mentally unwell or she's been scammed.

I don't think you have anything to lose by being firm with her and asking her out right. You care about her but you need to know the truth yourself for the sake of your friendship so you can figure out if she needs your support or whether you should walk away. I had a friend who was a liar and an alcoholic. Sometimes you have to put yourself first, you can't keep giving.

If she's been scammed the sooner she stops spending the better and your probing could help with that.

have you asked her what the compensation was for?

So he decided to take a lower figure to settle now. That makes sense. It is a stressful process and claimants often have to chose whether the extra money they might get is worth another year of their life being wrapped up in this

It doesn’t matter whether the friend’s claim was against the NHS or a private medical practitioner. Both would be handled as personal injury/medical negligence claims. The court would treat them the same, it’s not that private companies are liable to pay out more in compensation. It’s equally as unrealistic for OP’s friend to be paid out millions here by a private company!

The people sharing stories of NHS compensation are just giving an indication of what level of injury attracts what level of compensation. Again, the same compensation guidelines would be used with private companies. It’s all about placing the person back in the same position had the incident not occurred - not betterment