to refuse to allow my DH to set up his own savings account linked to our joint account

[BlueberryBelle]

My DH has just told me that he plans to set up a savings account where he will get a large sum of money at the end of the 12-month term (due to high interest rate). The account is linked to our joint account which is how he can set it up.

I have a solo account with this bank and he banks elsewhere.

He thinks I’m being unreasonable by saying we should both benefit from the account by us both putting money into the account equally, as it is linked to our joint account. His reason is that I can set up my own savings account linked to my solo account with this bank.

My view is that we previously had a savings account linked to my solo account which we equally contributed to and benefited from at the end of the 12-month term. In the meantime, he had set up a similar savings account linked to our joint account which he and his siblings contributed to and benefited from. I wasn’t aware of this until later on and objected, as I’d had no say. This is the jarring issue with me.

For information, we both put equal amounts of money into our joint account every month and joint bills are paid from it. Our personal accounts are for our own use and are not discussed.

AIBU to think he should find his own savings account and not link his personal account to our joint account (where only he benefits).

Y - you should allow him to link his personal savings account to the joint account.

N - he should find his own separate savings account.

Ahh. I see. It matters because he gets a large interest payment at the end of the year. He sees that as a real benefit for him.

My view is that if we both contribute, we can both benefit from it. Ultimately, I see us spending it on our family.

But since you can have a savings account linked to your own current account why not keep your own to yourself to even things out. Since the money in the savings account isn't actually coming from the joint account it isn't your money.

But you can open your own version of this account, you can both have one.

Can you change the "link" for your own savings account so it instead links to the joint account and it would feel like the benefit is equal?

How much can you even save though? Is it a regular saver one where it saves a set amount from your current account each month? That’s what I’ve been assuming.

The ones I’ve done in the past the maximum you could save per month was £300, and you ended up with about £100 interest at the end of the year. Which would hardly seem worth the argument.

Is it along these lines or something different?

My view is that he wants a savings account that only HE benefits from, he should do it with his own bank, not linked to our joint account.

I know that’s your view, hence why you are being incredibly unreasonable.

It’s actually a bit pathetic

She, unlike DH, already has her own bank account with that bank in addition to the joint account so she could be benefiting from their high interest products twice. Her DH is saying she should give the benefit of the joint account-linked high interest savings to him for his sole use, so she doesn’t benefit from it.

What’s pathetic is dishing out like that over something you’ve misunderstood 😂

Has he explained why he secretly set up this account attached to your account for him and his siblings to benefit from, rather than talking to you about making one for your nuclear family to benefit from. That's unacceptable but also just bizarre.

She can benefit from her own one.

That’s why he has suggested he benefits from the joint account one.

goodness me

In the grand scheme of things it really isn’t important.

We used to use this account for our family but it was linked to my account so I never benefited from it personally.

I will take on views of you all, but it being referred to as ‘pathetic’ is not really necessary.

Who has misunderstood anything?

The Op has a personal account and therefore can open one of these high interest accounts via that

Her DH only has access to the joint account, therefore to open one of the high interest accounts would need to do so via the joint account.

Him opening this account doesn’t take the opportunity away from the OP, they could both have one. Which is fair.

He sounds like he feels very entitled to solely benefit from your joint finances. And that sounds very wrong.

He won’t discuss it, said it’s done and dusted. I think he knows it’s unreasonable, did it for a couple of years until I put my foot down.

OP are you sure that you both have the same idea about who is “ family “?

Well...if that's right, can't you open a savings account and link it to the joint account to stop him?
It's devious, but I expect you're going to fall out over this anyway.

Well yeah, so assuming you at the very least understand what the word ‘joint’ entails you can see wherein the problem lies

They have two accounts with the bank:

1. OP's solo account
2. joint between OP and her partner

Two savings accounts have been created attached to these accounts, here's who benefits from each:

1. OP and her partner jointly
2. OP's partner and his siblings

Why do you think that is fair?

He has his own account with a separate bank. Why can’t he open his own separate savings account linked to that? Not exclude me from the savings account linked to our joint account.

You might just fall into the same odd category as the OP it seems.

This is all very odd and petty behaviour. The DH opening this account doesn’t stop the OP from opening her own.

I agree with PP, this isn’t just about a savings account, as no one in their right mind would be this uptight over something this small. Holding there is a backstory

You seem so rigid in this joint account and exclusion.

I am really hoping this is a straw that broke the camels back situation, as I struggle to believe there is a grown adult in this world that is this ridiculous

I believe you have more issues than just a bank account between you both that need to be resolved first.

I definitely wouldn’t do it, as it is devious. Yet he didn’t think twice about doing that for his sole benefit.

Hard to believe, but in all other ways we get on great and do things fairly equally. This just feels wrong and deceptive.

They previously had an account linked to the OPs personal account.

That they both contributed towards.

If the Op was expected to contribute to the joint savings account I’d agree with you, but she isn’t