DD still believes in Father Christmas

[FooFighter99]

She's 11 on Friday....

Do I tell her he isn't real, or let her eventually find out on her own?

I'm genuinely shocked no-one at school has burst the Santa bubble yet but I think Covid and no school for a year may be partly to blame

Is she too old? She's quite a young/naïve girl tbh (not baby-ish, but not overly mature either)

My DD13 at secondary still believes. She is autistic but no learning disability and attends mainstream. She’s actually quite mature in many respect for her age. I’d assumed she would have stopped believing by now but she was adamant that the elves had to come back this year. But then she came home from school upset the other day as a teacher had told them Santa isn’t real - in the context of the teacher having a younger daughter who is just starting to disbelieve and she wasn’t sure how long it would last. My daughter came home telling this and that the teacher is obviously wrong!! My DD10 in y6 believes but I actually think she secretly doesn’t believe due to some things she says now and again. She definitely doesn’t believe in the tooth fairy as her tooth fell out and she gave it to me and asked me for the money saying ‘I know it’s you!’ I nearly died inside.

All those saying the OP should tell her before high school. I don’t think she should. But I do think all you parents of children who no longer believe at high school should have a word with their kids about not bursting the bubble at school for those still believing.

All those saying the OP should tell her before high school. I don’t think she should. But I do think all you parents of children who no longer believe at high school should have a word with their kids about not bursting the bubble at school for those still believing.

absolutely no way will I ask any of my children to pretend Santa is real at high school

Well personally I'd like not to believe in a load of nonsense and somehow I manage to stay positive...
The idea that this is a sign of great parenting... 😂

It really depends on whether she "believes" or whether she believes. Some 11 year olds really do believe genuinely and wholeheartedly, but they're definitely in a minority.

If she "believes", she can go right on "believing" for as long as she likes. All the grown adults in my family are "believers".

If she believes, then it's much kinder if it's you, someone who loves and cares for her, that helps her realise, than a thoughtless or cruel child at school. Or even just a teacher who will assume that at secondary school age, children don't believe any more.

A friend sent me this - I know it's VERY NOT Mumsnet style 😁 but I think it can be tweaked and the sentiment is kinda right. Mines are too young yet but I might use something like this when the time comes.

Dear
You have been wondering about lots of things lately and looking for answers. You asked a very good
question: "is Santa your parents?"
I know you've wanted the answer to this question for a long time, and I've had to give it careful
thought to know just what to say.
The answer is no. Your parents are not Santa. There is no one, single Santa.
They may be the ones who fill your stockings and choose and wrap the presents, the same way their
parents did for them, and their grandparents did for them.
I imagine you will someday do this for your children, and I know you will love seeing them run down
the stairs on Christmas morning. You will love seeing them sit by the tree, their small faces lit with
Christmas lights. This won't make you Santa, though.
Santa is bigger than any person, and the magic has gone on longer than any of us have lived. What
Santa does is simple, but it is powerful; teaching children how to have belief in something they can't
see or touch.
It's a big job, and it's an important one. Throughout your life, you will need this capacity to believe…
in yourself, in your friends, in your talents, and in your family.
You'll also need to believe in things you can't measure or hold in your hand – like love, family and
friendship. Amazing, magical things that will light your life even during its darkest moments.
Santa is a teacher, and your parents have been his students… and now you know the secret of how he
gets down all those chimneys on Christmas Eve: he has help from all the people whose hearts he's
filled with joy.
With full hearts, people like Mummy & Daddy, take our turns helping Santa do a job that would
otherwise be impossible.
So, no, your parents are not Santa. Santa is love and magic and hope and happiness. Mummy &
Daddy are on his team, and now you are, too.