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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think life is just so much nicer with a bit of money

134 replies

Idontwantaworldfullofrobots · 14/12/2022 13:20

I’m not talking loads necessarily but just not constantly watching what you spend.
We’ve had times where we’ve had to watch every penny (currently sort of like this but grateful to have nice Christmas dinner & presents for Dd) and times in the past where we could go for mini breaks at Christmas or nice meals out and activities, maybe treat each other, not huge things. Life is just so much more enjoyable with a bit of money and really quite crap without, isn’t it

OP posts:
Sidking · 14/12/2022 14:47

Absolutely I would be happier if I had more money, I'm happy now without much disposable income, but having the money to live more comfortably/with more luxuries would definitely make me happier.

We recently had access to some money, not loads but enough to do things like fix the car, buy some things we'd done without (like a TV, a proper winter coat for me, things like that), do a food shop and pick up extras without worrying at the till etc. Being able to do those things definitely made me more relaxed overall and being able to say yes to my kids requests in the supermarket/b&m definitely made them (and in turn me) happy!

Having that opportunity has given me a bit of a shake to get my arse in gear and increase my earnings (self employed) so our lives can be like that on the regular

Thefriendlyone · 14/12/2022 14:58

Museya15 · 14/12/2022 13:59

Last year I was on universal credit, couldn't afford to eat, just made sure my children did and I ate the scraps. Now I am back to work and earn a good salary, I can sit here and say that mykids were happier when we had nothing, we lived by the sea, had nice weather so we're able to do picnics, parks etc. We have now moved nearer family but to a much colder, wetter climate, they are mainly indoors and cry to go back to where we were last year. So, no, money hasn't made us happier as I now stress they are unhappy.

But that’s not money making them unhappy that’s the fact you moved and you all don’t like it. If you were back where you were but with money you’d be even happier than when you were there as you’d not be eating scraps etc . It’s not having more money that’s made them unhappy , I’m surprised you think it is

Lilavanblue · 14/12/2022 15:01

Fully agree. Like you, we‘ve been in both situations over the last years - there were times where we were perfectly comfortable (not loaded) and times where we had to be very careful with money.
I really don’t mind being sensible when there is no urgent need, but when you’re really struggling and have got no choice it can really affect your mental health.

hattie43 · 14/12/2022 15:04

Having money is great . It doesn't take away life stresses but it certainly gives peace of mind knowing that whatever bill or emergency arises it can be paid for .

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 14/12/2022 15:26

Santacrazy · 14/12/2022 13:46

Of course you’re right, but I have found that outlook counts for a lot: when I have enough money I just find other things to worry about.

This is me. When I was worried about money it was all I worried about, it filled the ‘worry hole’ in my brain. Since we have money and that worry has evaporated the ‘worry hole’ has been filled with many other worries instead. Having the one worry was much simpler. (Obviously not talking about money worries if nearing destitution, that’s different, haven’t had that and must be horrendous)

GerbilsForever24 · 14/12/2022 15:37

I've thought about this a lot. Money can't buy happiness.. but it's a hell of a lot easier to be happier with money than without. That's just a fact. It removes a lot of stresses (that negatively impact happiness), and can create the kind of environment that is easier to be happier in.

We were never in truly dire straights but we had a couple of really skint years. And my god. The constant pressure and stress - worrying about where the money was going to come from for whatever came up next. Plus the complete inability to DO anything or GO anywhere. Things broke and there was little we could do. We were lucky that we never had to worry about the mortgage or day to day stuff and it was still hard.

Like a PP, being able to take a couple of holidays the last year or two has been transformational for us. Doing Christmas this year without panicking about the cost has made the whole thing so much more fun. I got a new car last year and I actively enjoy getting into it every single day. I took DD away for a ridiculous OTT weekend in London over the summer and we had the best time. DS and I are planning a weekend trip next summer. These things DO make me happy and are only possible because we have money.

Having money would not make having a sick child less scary and there are things that can ruin happiness that have nothing to do with money - bad relationships, mental health problems, bereavement and lots more. But many things are positively impacted by having money and I people who deny it are delusional.

SnitterBug · 14/12/2022 15:46

Yes it is . Money is freedom and comfort . It not about the stuff it gets you . It's about the choices it gives you . It empowers you .

SeveruslyFrazzled · 14/12/2022 15:49

Yes it certainly helps

Coffeepot72 · 14/12/2022 15:53

I was skint when I was younger and I hated it. I'm now fairly comfortable and whilst I would never say that money makes you happy, its nice not to have to worry about it. I'm sure most people would rather be rich and miserable, than poor and miserable!

blebbleb · 14/12/2022 15:53

Money definitely buy happiness!

NumberTheory · 14/12/2022 15:55

Not having to stress about how you are going to pay for necessities is a huge privilege. I think the not buying you happiness thing is because most people increase their standard outgoing apace with any increase in income and so they are still worrying about paying for their basics even when they have more money.

greenwoodpecker101 · 14/12/2022 15:58

LikeAStar1994 · 14/12/2022 13:24

Yep, I'm with you. I have never agreed with the term "Money can't buy happiness"

It can and does in many ways.

1000 per cent this.

Having money is like going through life with a force field around you. Protects you from so much, and makes it easier to get out of or minimize the bad stuff that does still happen.

And makes everything easier, easier to make new friends, find a partner, train for a decent job, escape a crap husband, get decent medical care ( now the NHS has got to shit).

As well as being able to buy the stuff that makes life fun and interesting.

Backstreetsbackalrightdadada · 14/12/2022 16:01

God I’d love some money! Money gives you time, opportunities, security, frivolity!! No guarantee on happiness, particularly depending on where it came from (eg lost youth working, or horrid family and inheritance that’s a trap)… but god I’d love
some money, really to treat some very kind people I know and maybe to go on a holiday!!

JackieDaws · 14/12/2022 16:02

Museya15 · 14/12/2022 14:16

I can afford all the clubs, days out etc but they still cry to go back to our old home. I'm so stressed over it, I made a massive mistake but we would've been homeless in the long run

Show quote history

Well, tell them that and so they know they'd be crying even harder in a bedbug infested council B&B.

Sunnysideup999 · 14/12/2022 16:51

I’ve known some very unhappy wealthy people. And some very happy people who have relatively little.
its all relative.
sadly mental health doesn’t discriminate - depression, anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, suicide - they happen to wealthy people too.

Fifthtimelucky · 14/12/2022 17:00

“Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen pounds nineteen and six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery.”
Mr Micawber, in David Copperfield.

WaddleAway · 14/12/2022 17:11

Sunnysideup999 · 14/12/2022 16:51

I’ve known some very unhappy wealthy people. And some very happy people who have relatively little.
its all relative.
sadly mental health doesn’t discriminate - depression, anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, suicide - they happen to wealthy people too.

They do. But as a general principle, those things are easier to deal with if you’re not also worrying about paying your bills at the same time.
Of course there are unhappy rich people, and happy poor people. But if you have enough money, it’s one less thing to worry about on top of life’s other stresses.

Thefriendlyone · 14/12/2022 17:36

Sunnysideup999 · 14/12/2022 16:51

I’ve known some very unhappy wealthy people. And some very happy people who have relatively little.
its all relative.
sadly mental health doesn’t discriminate - depression, anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, suicide - they happen to wealthy people too.

No but those problems are a fuck ton worse if you’re also worrying about paying your bills or heating your house, or what the kids will eat tonight,

Ipigglemustdie · 14/12/2022 17:39

Can't buy happiness, but you can rent it for like 90 odd years 😃

Mercurial123 · 15/12/2022 06:29

Sunnysideup999 · 14/12/2022 16:51

I’ve known some very unhappy wealthy people. And some very happy people who have relatively little.
its all relative.
sadly mental health doesn’t discriminate - depression, anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, suicide - they happen to wealthy people too.

Everyone struggles and goes through bad times. When you are living with no money it's all consuming. Having money helps and makes life easier. It definitely makes me happier.

Judgyjudgy · 15/12/2022 06:35

Absolutely. I'd rather cry in a Ferrari Grin

FurryDandelionSeekingMissile · 15/12/2022 06:54

Sunnysideup999 · 14/12/2022 16:51

I’ve known some very unhappy wealthy people. And some very happy people who have relatively little.
its all relative.
sadly mental health doesn’t discriminate - depression, anxiety, addiction, eating disorders, suicide - they happen to wealthy people too.

Mental illness does discriminate. www.mentalhealth.org.uk/explore-mental-health/mental-health-statistics/poverty-statistics

Admittedly, it also works the other way round, with mental illness causing reduced ability to earn a good income (ask me how I know!), but most people working in the area seem to be of the opinion that the evidence suggests being poor is bad for your mental health.

Pointless2 · 15/12/2022 06:57

Definitely agree OP.

maddiemookins16mum · 15/12/2022 06:58

Money does not always buy happiness, it does however always give you choice.
Choosing to put the heating on without flinching.
Choosing to eat better food.
etc etc

lollipoprainbow · 15/12/2022 07:03

I also disagree with the money doesn't make you happy nonsense. Of course it does! It makes for a much easier life not having to watch every penny. It's like when people get an inheritance and then say yes but we lost a loved one to get it. Better then losing a loved one and getting nothing !