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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have covid and see family at Christmas

84 replies

namechange2000000 · 13/12/2022 22:22

I'm 99% I'm going to test positive for Covid tomorrow, I'm convincing myself I can already see an extremely faint line on an LFT. AIBU to still see family over Xmas? All jabbed to a certain extent, no clinically vulnerable. No one is made to isolate anymore are they? Last Christmas my Mum had it so Christmas was miserable and lonely and we had so much planned for this Christmas Sad

OP posts:
TiredButAlive · 14/12/2022 20:02

Well I was triple jabbed (due a booster), not clinically vulnerable but in my 50s. I had it for 2 weeks and was bloody unwell. Really don't ever want a repeat of that! I wouldn't be too impressed if I'd caught it off someone who knew they were positive. Test again next week. I tested positive for the full two weeks and I kept my distance!

x2boys · 14/12/2022 20:06

Do you have any vulnerable family members?
I wouldn't go to see My parents if I had covid or any other virus tbh,because my mum in particular is very frail,,but that's my family.

StripyHorse · 14/12/2022 20:08

DuplicateUserName · 13/12/2022 23:00

Stay at home and isolate

Most of us have jobs to hold on to🙄🙄

Show quote history

So it's OK to pass covid to someone that then looses their job, and their quality of life because they get long covid?

BCBird · 14/12/2022 20:12

Think.you have do the right thing and accept that you potentially may not be able to go. Do you really want to.pass something onto someone? Wait until you trst negative. A faint line on a LFT is a positive.

x2boys · 14/12/2022 20:14

StripyHorse · 14/12/2022 20:08

So it's OK to pass covid to someone that then looses their job, and their quality of life because they get long covid?

Show quote history

If people's places of work are not going to pay it they are off sick now are they meant to pay their bills ,?p!us there are no.rules etc.how

TurquoiseBeach · 14/12/2022 21:45

Are you asking how those isolating with covid for a short period are meant to pay the bills or how those with long covid who can't work for months are meant to pay the bills? Or both?

Nagado · 14/12/2022 22:12

If you’re going to be honest about it being Covid, then the decision is theirs, but I think you need to tell them sooner rather than later so they’ve got time to come up with a Plan B if they don’t want to risk it. If they’re happy to take the risk then everyone is happy and nobody can get annoyed with you if they come down with it.

You’d only be in the wrong if you knew it was Covid and didn’t tell them.

Chickychoccyegg · 14/12/2022 22:20

I've no idea why you'd be testing or mentioning it to anyone at this stage, maybe by this time next week if you happen to still feel ill.

Nagado · 14/12/2022 22:35

Chickychoccyegg · 14/12/2022 22:20

I've no idea why you'd be testing or mentioning it to anyone at this stage, maybe by this time next week if you happen to still feel ill.

Because if someone doesn’t want to spend the day with someone from a household with a highly contagious virus doing the rounds, they have enough time to get themselves a turkey and/or make alternative plans. It’s polite.

EasterIssland · 14/12/2022 22:43

Hope you feel good op. I tested positive back in October, my husband tested nearly 5 days after. Week and a half after me testing positive both of us weren’t testing anymore, we had a fly on that day so it was good .
If it was you I’d tell them and it’s up to them if they want to, unless they’re vulnerable or taking care of a vulnerable person most people would most likely not care anymore. Covid is not the only illness that can make you ill and give you long term effects.

PineCone74 · 14/12/2022 23:08

namechange2000000 · 13/12/2022 22:25

@Britannah This is my stance, really. No one would've tested for cold/ flu.

But covid can be considerably more problematic for anyone who has compromised immunity than a cold can be. I feel I have lost count of the number of times I have seen the ‘ cold/flu’ comment. It is just so frustrating that people refuse to grasp this.

MrsSkylerWhite · 14/12/2022 23:10

If you’re positive, tell them and let them decide. Would be pretty shitty not to.

EasterIssland · 14/12/2022 23:14

PineCone74 · 14/12/2022 23:08

But covid can be considerably more problematic for anyone who has compromised immunity than a cold can be. I feel I have lost count of the number of times I have seen the ‘ cold/flu’ comment. It is just so frustrating that people refuse to grasp this.

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Anyone that has compromised system contracting flu can also be a problem that’s why they’re given the vaccine against flu

PineCone74 · 14/12/2022 23:16

Hbh17 · 13/12/2022 22:29

Why are you even bothering to test?? Most people definitely wouldn't. It doesn't matter whether or not you have Covid, as it's not a big deal. Just crack on with whatever you have planned.

I can only assume you’re not vulnerable, know anybody vulnerable, know anybody with long covid, etc etc. Only then could it be ‘not a big deal’.

stayathomer · 14/12/2022 23:20

As people said if you test positive tomorrow you won’t be spreading it Christmas Day surely? I disagree with people saying about rules, flu etc, if you’re sick with anything that can be passed on you shouldn’t meet up with loads of people- I’m sure they don’t want to be sick over Christmas, no matter how mild (and it may not be mild anyway, people can get whacked with illnesses!)

ilovesooty · 14/12/2022 23:22

PineCone74 · 14/12/2022 23:16

I can only assume you’re not vulnerable, know anybody vulnerable, know anybody with long covid, etc etc. Only then could it be ‘not a big deal’.

Show quote history

I wouldn't bother replying to her. She says that on every covid thread.

Original poster
namechange2000000 · 14/12/2022 23:26

Read all of your replies Smile Feel a bit groggy today but took another test and looks completely negative! Obviously I will test nearer to the time but for now, I shan't bother!

OP posts:
BashfulClam · 14/12/2022 23:31

I tested positive for 16 days and thought it was never going to eff off. Others I know were clear within 10 days. I read that after day 10 you are not considered infectious any more but that was a while ago.

Superstar22 · 14/12/2022 23:31

Long covid can be really awful. I work with people with long covid. Please don’t knowing spread any covid to anyone.

PingPongMerrilyWithPie · 14/12/2022 23:34

You'll be clear by Christmas. The issue is what about your DH or kids if they come down with it in a few days' time. I'd leave it til a day or two before Christmas and test whoever is most likely to still be positive. Reckon you'll all be negative by then anyway.

Keep family informed but I would expect original plans can go ahead.

EconomyClassRockstar · 14/12/2022 23:37

I can understand you asking this in, say, a week's time but by Xmas itself, you'll be fine. I had covid last week and am already negative. The first time I had it, I tested positive for about a month and really struggled to get over it for a while, even though I was never actually that ill in the first place. It's definitely a much weaker bug than it used to be.

DumpedByText · 14/12/2022 23:41

The guidelines are now saying 'most' people are no longer contagious after 5 days, so if you do test positive you'll be fine by the 25th. Hope you get off lightly.

Nagado · 14/12/2022 23:50

stayathomer · 14/12/2022 23:20

As people said if you test positive tomorrow you won’t be spreading it Christmas Day surely? I disagree with people saying about rules, flu etc, if you’re sick with anything that can be passed on you shouldn’t meet up with loads of people- I’m sure they don’t want to be sick over Christmas, no matter how mild (and it may not be mild anyway, people can get whacked with illnesses!)

I completely agree with this. You wouldn’t go to someone’s house with mumps, or Norovirus. There are no rules against it but normal, decent people understand that it’s a rotten thing to pass on to anyone else. Covid is no different.

Tabitha888 · 14/12/2022 23:54

It's two weeks away you'd probably be ok. However, covid made me so unwell. I wouldn't want it again. It's not like a cold or flu, just let them know and go from there x

TurquoiseBeach · 15/12/2022 00:00

DumpedByText · 14/12/2022 23:41

The guidelines are now saying 'most' people are no longer contagious after 5 days, so if you do test positive you'll be fine by the 25th. Hope you get off lightly.

Has it changed v recently? I thought two thirds were still positive after five days, which is why they could use the word 'many', rather than 'most'.