AIBU to rearrange midwife appointment?

[Tiredallofthetime]

Unfortunately, I’ve had to have more time off than anticipated this year. I am pregnant (8 weeks) and was due to see my midwife for the booking in appointment next week. We are supposed to give a form to our managers to sign for planned absence, and this must be done no later than two weeks in advance. Unfortunately I wasn’t in on Monday so have missed the ‘deadline’ as it were.

So quick question - I don’t remember covering anything vital in the first one, although it was during covid and so over the phone. The main concern is delaying the midwife appointment could delay my 12 week scan - does anyone know if this is the case? Sorry for shameless abuse of AIBU.

Could you ask the midwife on the phone about wether or not itl delay your appointment when you phone to rearrange? Maybe bringing it to their attention will prompt them to submit the form for it anyway. I think it varies by area how the first scans are booked to be honest.

Yes it generally does delay first scan, I'm 37 weeks pregnant currently and with this pregnancy there has been a shortage of community midwives in my area. I didn't get my booking appt until 11 weeks due to appt availability and it delayed my scan until 14 weeks. Had to get the harmony test for screening.

I work in maternity. In my trust, yes delaying your booking delays your scan. Your request for scan isn’t sent to ultrasound until 48 hours after you’ve had your booking appointment. Then there’s the actual availability of both a new midwife appointment and a scan. You should really attend the booking appointment.

That’s a pain for you @Nursemumma92 - I’ll be 10 + 2 at my booking in, so hope it doesn’t delay things too much. I was planning on the harmony test anyway but it is a worry that things may go unnoticed.

I never requested time off for ante natal appointments like I did for annual leave. I just told my manager I wouldn't be there, say, 3-5pm on Thursday because of a midwife appointment

They can't say no so you're just informing them as a courtesy not asking for permission

Why do you have to argue anything

just say I have an appt on x date at y time so will not be in.

You haven’t even mentioned this to them and are already making a drama out of it.

Like a pp said...I wouldn't ask them. I'd inform them I had an appointment so wouldn't be in.

Yes. It will. Is the simple answer.

Your booking appointment is actually really important. So much is covered in terms of medical, social and obstetric history and care planning. In most Trusts they only have a set number of available appointments as it is a longer one so more difficult to reschedule and yes it is likely to delay your scan; most mothers aren't put on the system until after the booking appointment.

There are also some medications that may need to be prescribed/consultant appointments planned etc.

Ultimately my advice would be to prioritise this appointment

Delaying your booking in appointment with delay your scan yes. It's called the 'booking in' appointment because that's when you're added to the system and from there they will then generate a scan appointment. If you don't have your booking in until you're say 11/12 weeks pregnant (by the time you have rearranged and got appropriate notice into work) then there's pretty much no chance of you having your 12 week scan on time. I suppose there's no major hurry if you're not bothered about the screening but overall I think you should be prioritising your antenatal appointments and not worrying what work think!

I realise that @Blondlashes and thank you. I think the devil in the detail here is ‘reasonable.’ I work three days a week and they will argue that I should rearrange the appointment so that it falls in one of my days off and that since I did not give the required notice and follow the correct procedure my request for time off will be denied.

They can’t do either of those things, it’s illegal - if they do, by all means get them to put these ‘shoulds’ in writing and watch the proverbial shit hit the fan for them.

You should have rearranged for your day off. You still can. Simply phone and ask to rearrange for one of your days off. It might well be the next week but if you explain your midwife will try to fit you in. In my area the midwife normally books your 12 week during your booking in appointment and they try to get up close to 12 weeks as possible but sometimes it might be 13 weeks.

If you speak to your employer they are unlikely to say no (pregnancy discrimination and all that)but like you said could affect goodwill.

Call into the surgery, sure they could rearrange it. Main thing is to get booked in for the scan. Explain to the receptionist what the issue is. Good luck

Any nonsense and you get 'legal' with them... it never turns out well for employers regarding pregnancy..

Give these folks a call first so that you know how to proceed if they so much as murmur decent from the law

pregnantthenscrewed.com/help/

Stand you ground . The rights are All on your side .

Well they can't book your scan until you go - then there is Christmas, New Year plus the NHS strikes plus all of the sickness at this time of year that will reduce the number of appointments

Personally I think you are crazy to delay

I’m not refusing to acknowledge it at all, @Grabyourcoats , if you read my posts you can see that I have said I will argue with them. But I know what they are like and I know an argument it will be; I would just have preferred to avoid that at the moment if I could.

I get that you might have an unhelpful employer but they literally can't refuse. You don't ask them / fill in a form. You tell them that you are going.

If they do anything remotely suspect (disciplinary etc) on the back of that you speak to Pregnant and Screwed who will signpost free legal advice and you take them to court.

I bet they don't do anything though!!!

Your posts on this thread are actually really getting on my nerves now. Sit down in front of your laptop this evening and write an email to your manager saying you have an antenatal appoint next week on (specify date and time) so you anticipate being back at work at approximately X time. End of.

In my first pregnancy I had to go to an appointment at 9am and there were various screw ups in the hospital which meant i didn't leave until 4pm. I had anticipated being out for an hour or two! I messaged my manager from the waiting room to let them know but that was it. Nobody questioned because that's just one of those things

You should have rearranged for your day off

No she shouldn't. She is entitled to time off for antenatal appointments

@Clouds3898 , why?

I don’t particularly care, to be honest, but I’ve said that I will be going to the appointment but that work are going to make it difficult for me. It isn’t my manager who will make the decision, by the way.

I can’t rearrange for my days off anyway unfortunately. My days off are mid week and the midwife only works Monday.