To think colleague should have asked if I wanted Christmas off before she booked it off?

[SulkySam]

AIBU to be a bit pissed off colleague booked this Christmas off when she had last Christmas off too? Isn’t it the polite thing to alternate having it off.

I started in role in September last year and she’d already booked off for last year before I started. Absolutely fine.

For this year she mentioned in conversation she’d booked it off, told me it had been approved as if it was fait accompli. No discussion and as it had already been approved there wasn’t much I could say! Quite pissed off manager just approved it as well.

Obviously I’ve know for a few months now but it is still making me seethe! She is an older lady, no DC while I have 5 DC including two disabled children.

Of course that doesn’t mean I have priority over her having time off for Christmas (just to make that clear before someone jumps on it) but isn’t it usual etiquette to take turns?

Annoying but I don't think she's done anything wrong. It's not for her to check with you first , did she even know you wanted the the time off ?

every man for themselves

When did you try to book it?

You need to speak to your manager, really. The system is wrong and needs changing, in my opinion, so people alternate. But I'm confused why this has only just occurred - shouldn't Christmas leave have been organised months ago?

Why didn't you book it off as soon as you could? Xmas comes around every year.

it's the 6th of December. I'm guessing she's assuming that since you haven't booked it, you don't want it.
You moaned that she didn't talk to you, did you talk to her?

Why should she ask you?

If she booked it in before you and its been approved I can't see that she has done anything wrong at all.

To be fair the OP has made it clear this happened a little while ago, so the colleague would have booked it off months ago

I think first come first served is a terrible way to allocate leave. In my team we discuss it amongst ourselves and then put the leave in. If there’s an overlap we work things out and take turns to cover. That’s how it should be.

I don't think the manager is to blame.!!!! Op hadn't tried to book it off so is the manager supposed to ask everyone for permission to approve it?

Op.... is there only the 2 of you in your job? What do you do?

Oh I've had this too, OP!!!! In my last job it happened two years on the trot before I managed to get in with all my holidays first!

My three colleagues had a system and they'd all put in at once for the entire year which meant I was left not being able to take any full weeks off because no one could take leave during certain times and they had the rest sewn up between them!

Our boss was useless about it, and it only changed when we got a new boss and I happened to be working on the first day we were allowed to book leave.

First come, first served doesn’t really work for things like Christmas

Everyone needs to be told “get your Christmas requests in by x date”, and then the manager decides what is fair/ in keeping with policy.

I think it’s unreasonable to expect your colleague to negotiate her holiday requests with you. She should make her request to management (as should you) and your manager should make sure things are fair.

Ours is supposed to be first come first served but it never works that way.
I have two related colleagues who've always had Christmas week off for the last ten years. I've worked there fourteen years and had it off twice, once through illness and once annual leave.
We book leave online and can only do it 12 months in advance. They year I got it I booked it at midnight on boxing Day and I'm doing it this year for next Christmas.
What fucks me off is the excuses they give for needing "it's my dds birthday and we always go out" that'll be the 36 year old you see every single day. Or we're taking the grandkids out as if my family don't matter.
Can you tell it fucks me right off.

It obviously meant something to your colleague so she made sure to book it early. My husband does the same because I have no option but to take two weeks at Christmas. If he doesn’t then I’m left on my Todd and he needs to take 2 weeks during the year on his own. We have no kids but funnily enough we like to spend the holidays together 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️

Not a TAAT. I saw the other one but it’s nothing to do with mine.

I’d been off for a few days on emergency leave as DC rushed to hospital and subsequently diagnosed with life changing condition so not really thinking ahead at that point. It was only when we were discussing if I’d be booking any more time off that she mentioned she booked Christmas off already. At the time I was kind of WTF but got on with it.

She has a different line manager to me and I’ve raised issues (performance related) with her before with mine and hers but her manager is very defensive of her and don’t seem to want to deal with her. We alternate between two roles. Her manager knew I worked last year. I would have thought she’d have told her to run it by me first.

Your manager should be balancing Xmas. My manager asks everyone their preferences and then doles out what's fair.

For Xmas day work we either do Xmas day, boxing day or New Years and tend to discuss ourselves.

If it's first come first serve I send in requests on Jan 1.

She shouldn't have to run it past you first, but your manager and hers should get a handle on actually managing their staff.

Er yes she should! I have to cover both her role and mine when she’s off. I’m part time. She’s full time!

Unless this happened the first day your annual leave allowance reset you’re still unreasonable for not booking it off first.

On a side note this is why I’m glad to not work somewhere that people are treated like children and can’t all take Christmas off.

I don't think your colleague should have avoided booking Christmas off on the assumption you wanted to take it, no.
Believe it or not, there are many people in the UK who don't celebrate Christmas. Others who don't have their children over Christmas and prefer to work, or need any extra bonus pay for the unsociable hours, or would simply rather be away from it all, or enjoy the work atmosphere. The fact you didn't book it quickly could mean you were in one of these categories as far as she knows.
Despite what you say about her circumstances being irrelevant, it's obvious you think that as an older, child free woman her Christmas is less important than yours, which is very entitled of you.
That said, the blame for this lies with your manager. Anyone with any sense sees these issues coming and designs a fair system, or at least makes the FCFS policy clear.

You should have booked it months ago.
And no, I suspect you're not contractually obliged to cover her leave, without having extra leave yourself.

No she shouldn't. Your manager needs to manager staffing levels.

I'd be asking your mama her when they requests have to be in. She had obviously out hers in and you haven't. Also not sure why you had left it until December to request Christmas off- our Christmas roster has been decided since October to make sure there were no changes and everyone knew in advance what they were doing

In my opinion there should be a policy for Christmas leave to make it fair. I don’t think first come first served should be the approach for time off over Christmas.