My 2 eldest children have weekend visits to their dad every other weekend (unless the children decide to stop home or he has to work).
About a month and half ago my youngest daughter let slip that dad has been stealing. I asked her what he had stolen and she said shopping like what we get. I asked was it food or clothes or something else and she said some was food and some was cleaning stuff and car fresheners. I asked her how did she know he had stolen (I was unsure of when she was referring to him stealing) and she said he gave stuff to her and her older sister and told them to keep quiet and keep walking out of the shop.
A few days later I asked both kids about what they had been asked to carry and take out of the shop and they both said that he does it every time they go down and they go shopping with him. He has even taken trolleys of shopping. (I only have their word on the trolley part)
I decided to ring him and ask him what has been going on. He agreed he had asked the girls to carry things out of the shops for him a few times and he had done it because money was tight. I told him his financial situation was none of my concern or the kid's concern either. I told him not to rope the kids in. (they are 10 and 11 and looking on Internet they can be arrested etc) He agreed he wouldn't do it again with the kids. I said I would keep them home if I found he did it again.
Roll on to today kids come home and say he had them carrying bleach and milk and tissues out of sainsburys down were he lives. Not only that he filled his car with fuel and filled a petrol tank and put it in the footwell where the kids were sat. And then backed out of the petrol station. I couldn't care about the petrol as that is soley on him but yet again he is using the kids, aswell as their 4 year old sister, to steal things.
I am beyond livid. I have explained to them they can be arrested and held as they are 10 and over. I live 2 hours away from where he lives and I would be devastated if I received a phonecall to say they had been arrested with him. I don't want that for them. I want to stop them going down because he clearly isn't listening and I warned him they would stop with me if he did it again with them. He clearly has no care for them or anything that can come of this. I've said the kids I will think about whether they go down again over the next week. I think I should keep them home but I wanted other people's view, opinions and perspective of this situation. Please help because I don't know where to go from here.
Many thanks for reading.