The Lady Hussey racism thing

[Tiiiiiiiiiiired]

I am really conflicted about this.

If went to live in Japan (I did live there for 3 years several years ago) I would be expected to be asked about where I'm from because I don't look Japanese (and in fact I was asked many times! I didn't mind at all, it was my choice to be in Japan and I knew I didn't look japanese). If I chose to stay in that country and have children, I'd expect my children would be asked the same, and their children and that although they would be Japanese by birth, I would hope they would be happy to talk about their heritage and where they are from and not mind being asked why they don't look Japanese and what the history is. I wouldnt think it racist and wouldn't want such questions to be stopped because we only learn from others, and about others, by talking and feeling safe to ask questions.

So why in the UK does everyone have to be sooo careful with what they say? This woman has a non English name, was wearing some non western clothing, as was asked about her heritage. Why is this abuse?

We need to stop being so sensitive and allow dialogue.

Was the tweet based on an actual transcript, ie recording, of the conversation?

I am white (and haven't RTFT) so forgive me but in my view it's really very simple.

To repeatedly ask somebody where they are from as if you don't believe the answer is fucking rude and offensive.

She was not asking "ah you're British, where are your ancestors from", she used the phrase "where are you really from". And she asked this repeatedly.

It is impolite. It is offensive. It is lacking any sense or sensitivity. It's bloody entitled and shows how you believe somebody is beneath you to not accept their answer to a simple question.

Nothing to be conflicted about really.

Lots of people who have (like me) grown up as part of the ethnic majority (i.e. White British in the UK) are struggling to imagine how it would feel to be an ethnic minority and to face this type of questioning. So how about instead of "If it were me I imagine I would be happy to answer the questions" or "If my children grew up as an ethnic minority I expect they would get asked about it all the time" - we go with the attitude of "I know I can't truly imagine how it feels to be regularly made to feel like an outsider in my own country, but what we can we all do to try and prevent people feeling that way?"

And someone’s version of a conversation can NOT be regarded as a “transcript”!!

I thought that too.

Racism thing is so throwaway and ugly.

There is a whole lot of wrong in this episode…. You moved her hair to see her badge.. why?? Then you refuse to accept she is English. If you asked a question, accept the answer given. Don’t keep poking because you don’t like the answer. ‘What part of Africa do you come from?’ is not a polite question to begin with.

Stop putting the blame on the victim. She didn't 'deliberately misunderstand' anything. She was probably assuming that she would be asked about her charity. Which she should have been, as that was why she had been invited.

I live in Scotland and am very very obviously English and very much in a minority I'm repeatedly asked where I'm "from" in shops, at work, people I meet when I'm walking my dog etc. Most people are just genuinely curious and just want to know why and how I ended up here there is nothing unpleasant about the question. I'm also teased by my colleagues about my pronunciation of some Scottish words, my inability to always understand what the hell they are saying or what some of the words they use mean. Im not offended there is nothing malicious about any of it.
Lets face it the poor women at these kind of functions has to make endless small talk with people she doesn't know pressing the flesh of loads of people and trying to make them feel welcome and at ease, ok yes maybe she shouldn't have kept going on and on but she is only human and made a mistake. As Pope so correctly says "to err is human". She's now being hounded in the press, her Godson apparently has "condemned" her, personally I think assuming she's had an impeccable record over the last 6o years then I think a simple apology along the lines of "I really didn't mean to cause offence I'm so sorry" should be sufficient.

I was stereotyping ! I said woman as we rarely see men here

Of course it's normal thought processes at the palace, and in lots of other aristocratic households.

It comes from a long history of British colonialism, with British people thinking they were superior to the inhabitants of countries such as India when it was under British rule.

Most members of the royal family are aware of this and I'm sure they try hard to keep any racist views under wraps (excepting Princess Michael of Kent who made her views very clear).

Just because they can smile and accept flowers from little brown children doesn't change their inherent propensity to believe themselves superior.

The tweet was from N.

and it was simply her version of the conversation

but she’s been referring to it as a transcript

nope. It is NOT a “transcript”

it is N’s recollection

Given Hussey apologised and resigned, that’s acceptance of the transcript.

This, Once the question has been answered, it is rude to repeat it because you don't like the answer.

My DH is white british but has olive skin and could pass as Spanish easily. Quite a few people have questioned him a la Lady Hussey and what it means is "you are too dark to belong here, go back to where your family came from" which in his case is still Basingstoke no matter how many times the question is asked.

It wasn't good what she did, but the amount of nedia attention being devoted to it is amounting to bullying this elderly lady now

This.
And thankfully there are a lot of people like you around.

Why are posters going on about english? The term used was british.

While I don't agree with the tone of the questioning and agree it was rude not to leave it, I do think dress plays a role.

If I wore full highland dress I'd expect to be asked if I'm Scottish. If I said 'no: then the follow up question would likely be 'are your family from there',?

Also, when does it become cultural appropriation when you don't in any way identify with that region? Is it possible to have it both ways? I genuinely don't know the answer so just curious.

I am mixed race and live in a place my accent doesn't fit but I find it a really useful ice breaker. Others feel differently

Exactly.

And no people don't have to be okay with this and dismiss it as "ignorance". It's a bloody interrogation not a conversation.

I think the Queen's death was the time to diplomatically retire some of the less contemporary-minded of the 'court' or whatever they're called. Aside from the obvious racism, this conversation was very rude and undiplomatic, and not conducive to promoting the subject of the event. The Royals need best foot forward if they're going to be relevant now and in the future.

I agree with this

I think her mannerisms and aggressive questioning style made the questions more toxic. Having been questioned myself about where I'm really from, I can tell by the style of questioning whether the person is being malicious or not. There's no need to be rude, there are more diplomatic ways of finding out someone's background. Racists tend to be rude, aggressive and threatening in their manner.

*musingsinmidlife *Why do you constantly refer to Lady Susan Hussey as "royal" in your post at 11.25? She isn't royal. She was a lady-in-waiting to the late Queen. That doesn't make her a member of the royal family!

Cute that you think anyone cares about your opinion.