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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can't get through to cancel!

260 replies

Ellessdee · 30/11/2022 16:15

Been away for work meeting. About to drive back but my car has broken down. AA can't fix it (they're unable to diagnose the issue) so need to take to local garage tomorrow. Work have put me in a hotel overnight. Have an appointment with cardiology for minor surgery at 7.45 tomorrow morning. Can't get through to hospital to cancel (just rings out) and apparently their phones open at 8. What do I do? Just not show up?

OP posts:
OldEnoughToHaveReadBunty · 30/11/2022 22:42

tootiredtobother · 30/11/2022 16:17

will your gp surgery pick up the phone ? they may have a more direct means of contact

Sorry but no they won't. I work in a GP surgery. We have the same struggles contacting hospital clinics as the patients.

OrangeKettle · 30/11/2022 22:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

OrangeKettle · 30/11/2022 22:51

p.s. When I call a hospital on behalf of a patient, I Google the department and the words “consultant ” and “secretary” and call every number I find until I get through to someone who can help. It frustrates me that patients may be anxious about things and struggle to get through. So I try to take on the chasing for them.

Kendodd · 30/11/2022 22:57

I cant believe the grief you're getting on this thread OP.
Are people really so clueless about just how little money some people have? 20% of people have no savings at all in this country.

Elvira2000 · 30/11/2022 23:04

This thread is batshit but eye-opening as to how many people do not understand the concept of living hand to mouth and not being able to just merrily put aside money for emergencies.

I totally agree with this. This is the fault of government, which is shit. It has caused a situation where someone who works can't russle up 100 quid at short notice and a health service that is in such decline. People are so angry they are venting nastiness like this.

This is what the conservatives love. The plebs turning on each other. Not understanding the difficulties that some (most?) of us are going through.

Blame the right people, not someone who's had a run of bad luck.

PurpleWisteria1 · 01/12/2022 00:00

BlooberryBiskits · 30/11/2022 21:23

^ this thread is a real eye opener to me of how many people (NOT the OP who has explained her v difficult circumstances due to an ex) think it’s ok to live that way, & also waste public funds which cost everyone in the long run

FWIW: I was born to WC immigrant parents, spent my early childhood in a council house and my early years of working life in a share house with no shower/bath or kitchen … I think I do know what it’s like to be short, the stress it causes, and would do anything to not live like that

Show quote history

Me too.
Ok the OP sounds like she’s been through a series of tough times- fair enough.
But seriously - it’s now vile to suggest that £50-£100 should be kept aside for dire emergencies as an absolute priority?
The sheer anxiety panic i would feel if I didn’t have even enough money for a long taxi ride home if I was stranded in my bank account would be worth any sacrifice I had to make - be that another job, no heating, eating 20p pasta all month. Anything just to scrape a few quid for dire emergencies.
Yes I know people are facing a tough time at the moment but the vast majority of the country could do this given time if they were honest with themselves.

been and done it. · 01/12/2022 00:25

Notanotherwindow · 30/11/2022 17:45

Also, FGS what surgery - even a MINOR one takes 10 minutes?! Confused None that I know of!

I imagine what you don't know of could fill several libraries.

Well said

custardcreme77 · 01/12/2022 05:47

Glad you got it sorted OP and best wishes to you.

WiddlinDiddlin · 01/12/2022 06:54

PurpleWisteria1 · 01/12/2022 00:00

Me too.
Ok the OP sounds like she’s been through a series of tough times- fair enough.
But seriously - it’s now vile to suggest that £50-£100 should be kept aside for dire emergencies as an absolute priority?
The sheer anxiety panic i would feel if I didn’t have even enough money for a long taxi ride home if I was stranded in my bank account would be worth any sacrifice I had to make - be that another job, no heating, eating 20p pasta all month. Anything just to scrape a few quid for dire emergencies.
Yes I know people are facing a tough time at the moment but the vast majority of the country could do this given time if they were honest with themselves.

Show quote history

It is pretty vile to make smart arse comments about what people should do after the fact, when they cannot do that thing now!

How wonderful that you'd do anything at all (really, anything, I'd bet you actually wouldn't) to have that spare £100.

Now what would you do if you had your perfectly saved emergency £100, and you had an emergency, spent it all...

And then the next day, or the day after, you had another emergency?

This happened to me - one week our boiler died. We had some spare, we got it fixed. Then the washer died.

My spare fund was gone - what do I do, go on a magical quest for a money tree?

It is nice to have an emergency fund, I always aim to have one these days but it's taken me a bloody long time to build up a couple of grand and a clear credit card, well over 10 years. I expect to see my entire emergency fund wiped out by the COL.

Then I'll be back where I was a decade ago, hand to mouth and nothing in hand for disasters. Joy. But clearly, that'll be me being foolish eh.

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/12/2022 08:52

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

You brought up that you couldn't afford the fair to get back, hence my suggestion.
No one knew how far you were allowed to 'drive home' .......

Resorting to insults when people give suggestions 🙄.

Wiccan · 01/12/2022 09:49

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/12/2022 08:52

You brought up that you couldn't afford the fair to get back, hence my suggestion.
No one knew how far you were allowed to 'drive home' .......

Resorting to insults when people give suggestions 🙄.

Show quote history

Some well deserved insults I think . I've seen some poundings on MN but never thought a working women struggling financially would be such a target for the haters ! Some people are so fucking entitled.

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/12/2022 10:29

Wiccan · 01/12/2022 09:49

Some well deserved insults I think . I've seen some poundings on MN but never thought a working women struggling financially would be such a target for the haters ! Some people are so fucking entitled.

Show quote history

Please quote where I insulted OP.

Original poster
Ellessdee · 01/12/2022 10:52

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/12/2022 10:29

Please quote where I insulted OP.

Show quote history

Passive aggressive 'drip drip' 🙄

OP posts:
Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/12/2022 11:47

Ellessdee · 01/12/2022 10:52

Passive aggressive 'drip drip' 🙄

Show quote history

Truth is truth.

Hadjab · 01/12/2022 13:09

BlooberryBiskits · 30/11/2022 18:08

This is an aside but I actually DON’T understand how anyone (who has been living somewhere a while) would not be able to access cash for an emergency: friends, family, sell something, payday loan etc … and if you can’t it’s pretty worrying.

I was stony broke in my younger years and hated the stress of it. I would literally eat baked beans and drink water to not be in that position and have done (well, weeks of bread & cheap jam). Even if you were using a food bank you would still be able to access some money

So you've experienced being broke, yet you can't understand the OP's position? Alrighty then...

ifIwerenotanandroid · 01/12/2022 13:25

WiddlinDiddlin · 01/12/2022 06:54

It is pretty vile to make smart arse comments about what people should do after the fact, when they cannot do that thing now!

How wonderful that you'd do anything at all (really, anything, I'd bet you actually wouldn't) to have that spare £100.

Now what would you do if you had your perfectly saved emergency £100, and you had an emergency, spent it all...

And then the next day, or the day after, you had another emergency?

This happened to me - one week our boiler died. We had some spare, we got it fixed. Then the washer died.

My spare fund was gone - what do I do, go on a magical quest for a money tree?

It is nice to have an emergency fund, I always aim to have one these days but it's taken me a bloody long time to build up a couple of grand and a clear credit card, well over 10 years. I expect to see my entire emergency fund wiped out by the COL.

Then I'll be back where I was a decade ago, hand to mouth and nothing in hand for disasters. Joy. But clearly, that'll be me being foolish eh.

Show quote history

Exactly. This same sort of patronising condemnation of people who were in difficulties through no fault of their own was evident in the comments on a local news report a few years ago.

An accident occurred at commuter time on a busy dual carriageway going through open countryside. Police shut the road for hours, trapping motorists on it. Drivers expecting to be home in half an hour got home e.g. 6 hours later. They wrote in the comments complaining about being left there with no loos, water, food, access to meds or stuff needed for their kids who were in the car with them.

A crazy number of other people criticised them for not taking sufficient food & water etc with them, as anyone with half a brain would apparently always make provision for any half hour journey to last 6 hours, & anyone who didn't do this was a feckless idiot.

I read it & thought, 'What if you packed enough for 6 hours & it took 13 hours? Are you still an idiot?'. Some people will criticise others for the most ridiculous things.

Wiccan · 01/12/2022 17:00

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/12/2022 10:29

Please quote where I insulted OP.

Show quote history

You stated that the OP was resorting to insults at some suggestions given .
I said some of the insults were well deserved.
I did not state that it was YOU !

TrixieMixie · 01/12/2022 17:58

That sounds very stressful. Hospitals can be incredibly difficult to contact by phone, the pressure on the NHS is intense. I’m glad you’re sorted and I hope your rescheduled procedure goes well.
💐

Solonge · 01/12/2022 18:14

There should be a bleepholder for the hospital…..hospitals don’t shut at night….you might need to play around with wording on search…out of hours bleep holder..etc….if you don’t cancel you may end up being put to the back of a very long…several years, queue.

Bekstar · 01/12/2022 18:16

Phone at 8. Your appointment may be 7:45 but that's usually a turn up time for most morning patients at most hospitals who are going in for operations. So don't worry too much they won't mark it as a no show until the morning has passed and not at all if you ring and explain at 8am

niugboo · 01/12/2022 18:31

It’s a bit late but for future reference if you keep ringing and can’t get through email PALS or complaints team with details just so you can prove you tried but also they can free up the slot if they see it.

don’t feel too bad, they overbook day surgeries because they know this happens.

CarPoor · 01/12/2022 18:52

Hernamewaslola1 · 30/11/2022 19:20

Keep trying to ring the hospital switch board. Depending on which hospital it is there will be a cardiology registrar on site if it's a tertiary hospital or off site if it's a district general. If on site, ask to speak to the on call cardiology registrar- you might get through to their bleep, state your name clearly and then wait for them to answer the bleep. If off site, you can be put through to the on call medical registrar who SHOULD be able to take a message with your details and pass it on in the morning. Alternative is to be put through the inpatient cardiology ward and leave a message with the nurse in charge

Are you taking the piss?

You would be wasting more valuable NHS time contacting the medical registrar than just not turning up tbh.

I literally cant imaging the fucking medical registrar having to deal with calls about patients cancelling minor procedures.

GingerNutMe · 01/12/2022 18:59

On a different note - please do make sure you have business use on your insurance policy. God forbid something happened and you didn't have it (hopefully you do).

People expect to pay huge premiums for this but occasional business use generally costs nothing extra or maybe just a few pounds more.

I hope all is well with the car now, and nothing too expensive. We don't want the cost setting off a heart attack now do we !!!

HappyWinter · 01/12/2022 19:07

Elvira2000 · 30/11/2022 23:04

This thread is batshit but eye-opening as to how many people do not understand the concept of living hand to mouth and not being able to just merrily put aside money for emergencies.

I totally agree with this. This is the fault of government, which is shit. It has caused a situation where someone who works can't russle up 100 quid at short notice and a health service that is in such decline. People are so angry they are venting nastiness like this.

This is what the conservatives love. The plebs turning on each other. Not understanding the difficulties that some (most?) of us are going through.

Blame the right people, not someone who's had a run of bad luck.

Quite. I'm surprised by a lot of the responses, I wouldn't be surprised if a lot are bots, has no one noticed the cost of living crisis? I can easily see how someone wouldn't have £100 spare when their monthly expenses may be £100s more a month. £100s that they do not have. If you are on a low wage, it's impossible to make ends meet at the moment. The PP who said it's difficult to have enough for a rainy day because it's fucking pouring at the moment nailed it.

Mrschristmasqueen · 01/12/2022 19:07

I rarely comment on threads but this one is batshit!
OP, I'm glad you've managed to reschedule your quadruple heart bypass 😉 just make sure to trim down that money tree in your garden when you do get home, won't you.

On a serious note, I hope your car is all sorted for you.