To tell DH I don’t like his signature dish?

[Notsympatheticenough]

He makes beef burgers. It’s his thing, bbq with beef burgers. He’s a good cook, cooks other stuff really well. But he’s convinced his dry, stodgy, unseasoned beef burgers are the best thing he does. I’ve avoided eating them pretty much for the last 10 years of our relationship, there’s usually other stuff, people round, it’s a bbq…you know? . Tonight he said ‘as a treat, I’ll just do the burgers’.

my heart sank. And the little hungry bit of me died a bit.

DH makes curry in the slow cooker.
It's like regular curry. If regular curry tasted like tinned vegetable soup. He puts loads of ingredients in but somehow the flavour just disintegrates along with any texture it might have had.
His slow cooked stew on the other hand is top-notch. I just die a bit inside when he tells me he's batch-cooking curry in the bloody slow cooker.

This - exactly this - tbh DH is fab cook & i tell him so often but very very occasionallly when I have said I wasnt keen on something he gets a little deflated/huffy & I feel like I shot Bambi - the excuse as above is what I used for salmon dishes, smoked or grilled & I am pleased to say it works

Again, I don't see why you'd think his was part of AIBU. This should be framed as an etiquette question, a food question, or a marital relations issue - because the deeper issue is that you've been lying to him for ten years, and maybe about other things as well.

However, treating it as an etiquette question, you say: "You know, I'm finding that as I get older, I just am less interested in hamburgers the days, and they're not the treat they once were. How about something else, like your caviar souffle, which is more my idea of a treat?"

In eight years of marriage my ex NEVER cooked for me. Honestly I dont even remember a cup of coffee unless I asked. Please dont burst his bubble. My suggestions are, Buy him some speciality books saying "yours are so good these may give you EXTRA improvements" what about these, Download some masterchef episodes with burger specials. I am just suggesting ....push... him into the right direction, If he tries new things you can OPENLY criticise without causing offence, ie these are too salty/sweet/dry etc OR OH WOW, that change makes them better. It IS manipulative but what the hell !

I'd probably go with a version of the truth. For me, it would be something like: "I can't handle too much red meat at the moment - I'm digesting it for a week. So I can carry on REALLY enjoying your Special Burgers, can you loosen the meat with something else? Ground halloumi? Shallots?"

But then again, if it's only once in a while, I'd probably let it go. Well, let it go or just be completely honest and tell him, one of the two, depending on my prevailing mood

😄

LTB! (Lob The Burgers)

LOL.

In general I'm not a fan of blaming things on being "hormonal" but in this case ...

"DH, maybe it's age-related or something but my taste buds seem to have changed. I'm going to need more seasoning and less crust on burgers from now on."

Blame the mince?

"Sorry to tell you this DH but your burgers aren't the fabulous things they used to be - I'm convinced it's that the mince just isn't as tasty any more. I think a bit of seasoning might fix it though, what do you think would work best in burgers?".

Love this, there's a lot of love on this thread! 😄

Christmas is coming up @Notsympatheticenough ....
'The Burger Book: Banging burgers, sides and sauces to cook indoors and out' amzn.eu/d/e0AHoS3

😂😂😂

You have avoided eating them for 10 years - has he noticed you don't eat them? It must feel like he doesn't know you at all

There is a lot of love on this thread, and carbonara and labradors.

he noticed my slight lack of joy and did some chicken too, sweet. . But I thought, hey, try the burger, Bambi has cooked burgers, eat a burger, especially as he’d gone to an extra shop to get a burger bun I might like.

its 5.30am and I’ve got heartburn from hell, the burger was as bad as 10 years ago. The dog ate most of it, quietly under the table.

I now have an excuse but I can’t now ever eat a burger out can I?

And he doesn’t walk into the kitchen in chef’s whites and whip the top off a platter and sat ..’behold, my signature dish’. He’s proud of his burgers, his family appear to like them and it’s good we share the cooking.

he does go on about them quite a lot though….

I've known a few people thnk they've got their hummus recipe nailed and they haven't. None of them peel the chickpeas first and they think if it looks right it tastes right. Hummus may be simple to make but it isn't easy!
OP, tell him he must have changed something as suddenly they're tasteless. Suggest seasonings etc.

Well done for trying a burger, sorry about the heartburn.

I think you need to tell him. It's gone on 10 years and the burgers are still as shite as ever.

I also had to break this sort of news to both my DF and DH for both of their signature dishes. (My husband also makes bland beef burgers BTW)

The important thing is that you tell them NOT at the time when they are cooking it or thinking about cooking it and obviously that your relationship is strong enough for them to take this constructive feedback.

When you tell him, he will probably be shocked, so be aware. Say when he makes it again could you leave some mixture left over so you can season as you like - so you are not telling him to never make it again.

Also suggest that if it gives you such bad heartburn that he doesn't make this for guests as you would hate them to be come ill with it.

Good luck

🤢🤮 oh my

My husband made a butternut squash curry the other day. It was partially raw and smelt of feet. I had to turn round and tell him it was the worst thing he had ever cooked in 22 years and I would divorce him if he tried a repetition. I couldn't bear the thought of eating it.

My dh has 1 signature dish.
Spaghetti bol. He starts with burning the onions. Every time for 35 years.

Leave the bastard

Dh once said of an ex 'She never let me cook!'. After a not very long time I realised why.

His signature dish was a chicken cooked with onions and orange juice and alot of sugar. He's vegetarian now so it is a dish lost in time.

Leave the burger! 😂

My dh and children take great delight in telling me what they dislike about the food that I cook but reading some of these horrors I think they should be grateful that my crimes are things like putting onions in bolognaise, kidney beans in chilli, mash on a fish pie, fish in the fish fingers and chips...I could go on all day, there is always something one of them doesn't want to eat.

His family don't like them either op

It's time to become a veggie

He needs to salt the courgette to get the liquid out before cooking.

OP

Tell him you had an awesome burger a couple of weeks ago, better even than his and you thought it was the seasoning they had added, could he try to replicate it?