To tell DH I don’t like his signature dish?

[Notsympatheticenough]

He makes beef burgers. It’s his thing, bbq with beef burgers. He’s a good cook, cooks other stuff really well. But he’s convinced his dry, stodgy, unseasoned beef burgers are the best thing he does. I’ve avoided eating them pretty much for the last 10 years of our relationship, there’s usually other stuff, people round, it’s a bbq…you know? . Tonight he said ‘as a treat, I’ll just do the burgers’.

my heart sank. And the little hungry bit of me died a bit.

Here's the solution but it will take a few goes.

1. eat the burger. Complain about heartburn
2. go to bed and then have to get up to fetch some rennies.
3. eat the burger
4. complain about worse heartburn and wonder aloud what could have caused it
5. next time he makes burger say 'oh no, i think they give me heartburn- what an absolute pain. You have one and I'll have something else.'

Oh god this is dh's roast potatoes. He refuses to parboil them or heat the oil first so they are kind of hot solid potato shapes.

Get him a fancy burger making kit for Christmas?

My DH is a brilliant cook, makes great curries and all sorts of lovely elaborate meals but he makes really really awful omelettes. Always dry and overcooked. Even though I've tried (tactfully) saying I like them less well-cooked. After 15+ years I now just jump in fast and say "I'll do it!" whenever the suggestion of an omelette comes up.

Omelette maker for Christmas for him notsinging??

Oh god, my partner does this vegetable and egg tart/quiche thing that he is always so proud of and it tastes of, somehow, both nothing and total undefinable grossness at the same time. Offered to bring some round for me the other day and I made an excuse but he spends hours on this monstrosity so I feel bad for saying anything!

DH is an amazing chef but he’s tried to copy something from a restaurant which is grated courgette, Parmesan and chilli.

Occasionally it’s lovely. Sometimes it’s horribly watery. Usually it’s a congealed mess.

The other month he text to say he’d bring home a takeaway. I got excited. He arrived back with ingredients for that shite. I told him I’d have a toastie and he got upset.

He’s not tried to cook it since though.

Tell him you've given up red meat

Lucky you that it's just burgers - every God damn dish my DH makes gives me the shivers, and no I should't just be grateful that he cooks, I LOVE food - GOOD food!! Not the over-cooked / under-cooked / burnt / forgot-about-it shizzle he dishes up. But, he does it with a zest and enthusiasm that he doesn't show elsewhere in life so it's always a big show from me of how amazing it tastes 🤗

Ah, It's ten years down the line though. If he were a shite cook and you were at the end of your tether suffering his culinary horrors it would be one thing, but seeing as he's generally a good cook I'd probably let this one go.

Alternatively make your own burgers and pull the rug from under him

high fat beef mince
salt and pepper
some brown breadcrumbs
lots of worcester sauce
mix into patties without overworking and then chill them before cooking.

Just tell him. You can soften the blow and blame peri menopause and say your taste buds have changed and stuff you once loved is now feeling bland. You still love the burgers but would love it if you added......... and i know how great you are in the kitchen... that sort of thing.
My partner makes the most disgusting carbonara. I tell him its not right. He sees it as a challenge to keep making it till i give in
I wont ha

Ewwww poor you

Just tell him. I had a similar problem with my husband and his curry. I was too tired to humour him one particular day, I just said " love, I appreciate the effort but your curry is inedible, it's wrong that food should hurt when you eat it, it's not a bit top end it's agony". He sulked for a little while. Life's to short.

Tell him you fancy a try. Then make the finest burgers in all the land. Rich, succulent, perfectly seasoned, with all the trimmings. So delicious that no other burger can compare, and he begs to learn your recipe and technique.

Caveat: he may just insist you make them forevermore.

LTB op

🤣🤣

I don’t think he needs to mix burger meat with anything – adding onions, breadcrumbs, egg etc creates meatloaf or meatballs, not burger – but he needs to barely touch the mince to shape it rather than toughening it by overworking it, undercook, and do the ice cube trick.

The difficulty of course is getting him to do all that when it’s his signature thing. Can you hobble his ankles on the way to the kitchen?

Who even has a "signature dish"?

Men who can’t cook it.

My husbands are delicious.

Into 8-12% fat beef he adds a good shake of cajun/jerk seasoning, black pepper, shake of soy, tablespoon of mango chutney.
Mixed thoroughly, make into balls, allow to chill for an hour.

Flatten and fry.

Serve with a load of caramelised onions, fried mushooms, cheese, coleslaw, tomato, lettuce piled high on the bun.

A feast.
The children's friends have always asked for the recipe.

Juicy, tasty and easy.

"They're not asgood as you usually do them, bit dry tonight"

That actually sounds delicious 🤤

@billy1966 Into 8-12% fat beef he adds a good shake of cajun/jerk seasoning, black pepper, shake of soy, tablespoon of mango chutney.

Intriguing ingredients ~ they do sound delicious!

Tell him all recipes should be revisited and experimented with over time so they can develop and get even better, and then make suggestions for how they could be made edible. It doesn't sound like they're beyond saving.